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Hello! My mother is having to move to Miami for work within the next couple of months. Her place of work is located in Coral Gables, and while I would love for her to live there I understand it's pretty expensive. I've looked at places nearby like Coconut Grove, and have found some decent places to live for 1300+. Is that too much to pay for a 1 bedroom apartment? I would like her not to have to drive too far, or pay too much, and for the area she stays to be safe.
I've used realtor.com and craigslist. Please let me know other websites or different areas I should be looking at, I don't live in Florida so I'm trying to help her with what I can gather from information on this sub, and what I can find online.
Tired of seeing posts on here shitting all over Tinder. If you do it right there is no easier way to meet women in my opinion. The ones shitting on it are the ones not having any success. I've been successful at Tinder(and Bumble) for the past couple of years and let me show you how I do it. I know a lot of Tinder guides have been posted here before, but here is my take on how to have success.
Step 0 - Understand The Ultimate Maxim of Tinder
IF YOU ARE NOT GETTING MATCHES, ITS BECAUSE YOUR PICTURES SUCK. 100% of the time this is the case. It's not Tinder screwing you, its not Tinder trying to get you to pay for its Plus/Gold features, its not shallow women, its not women only on there for validation, its not a glitch, its not anything but the fact that your pictures are ass. Keep this in mind when you inevitably see someone shit on Tinder in the comments of this post or elsewhere on TRP.
Step 1 - Understand The Tinder ELO System and how it works
Basically Tinder uses an ELO rating system to "rate" each account to judge how attractive the account is based on their swiping and how they get swiped. Obviously, if your profile gets swiped right a lot, you'll have a higher rating, and vice versa. It's not just how people swipe you that determines your rating, but also how picky you are. If you are swiping right on everything, your rating will go down because when you do that you are swiping right on low rated profiles. If you are pickier and only swipe right on higher rated profiles, you'll have a chance for a better score, assuming you are getting swiped right a lot as well. To learn more about how the ELO rating system works mathematically, check out http://archive.is/O07Ad
TLDR, your Tinder ELO score is determined on the rating/quality of profiles swiping right on you, and the rating/quality of profiles you are swiping right on.
Step 2 - Know your competition
One thing I recommend doing, if you have the time, is creating a burner Facebook account as a woman. Use it to make a Tinder account and select that you are interested in men. This way you can scroll through the profiles to see the men you will be competing with in your area.
A general theory of Tinder is that for brand new accounts, you get a "noob boost", which means they are going to show you the higher ELO rated Tinder accounts first, and your profile will also be put toward the top of other user's stacks so they don't have to scroll through many profiles before seeing yours. This doesn't mean every single Tinder account in your stack that you scroll through will be high rated, because remember, there will also be new accounts in your initial stack who are also being boosted, many of which will suck.
Why am I mentioning this noob boost? Because you can use this to scout your competition. The profiles you will be seeing when you do this are generally the profiles the attractive women will be seeing. That way you know what you need to do to beat the competition.
For the sake of this post I went ahead and did this for my area(medium sized city in the Southern United States). I scrolled through the first 100 male profiles and gave each profile a rating on picture quality(1 being shit, 5 being top tier) and attractiveness(1 being ugly, 5 being top tier) and then I flagged an account if they were not lean.
Settings: Age 18-32, 30 mile radius.
Of the 100 profiles, only 3 of them had what I considered top tier pictures. Most were shitty selfies, bad quality pictures that had grainy or fuzziness in them, bad lighting, or bad poses. Lots of crappy gym selfies and mirror selfies. The average picture quality rating was 1.866 out of 5. That's bad, and shows you don't really need to do much to have better pictures than the rest.
The average attractiveness rating was a 2.1, not much higher than the picture quality number. And this is supposedly contains the best profiles? I think a lot of the profiles I saw were "noob boost" profiles, no way they would be high rated. Either way, I only handed out a "5" to 4 profiles, that's 4%, and only handed out a 4 to 3 profiles. That means out of 100, only 7 were what I considered attractive enough profiles a woman would swipe right on.
65 of the 100 profiles were not lean, 51 were overweight, and 32 were obese. Once again, shows how much impact being lean has.
Average age was 20.9, but the average age of the profiles I gave a 3 or higher to was 24.6. Older guys seem to have a better grasp on this.
Moral of this story? You really don't have a high bar to clear when it comes to having a top tier Tinder profile. Most guys Tinder profiles suck ass. All you need are good quality photos and to be lean to beat most Tinder profiles out there. Unless Tinder only shows the highest rated accounts to accounts who already have a proven high ELO score and still hides them even from noob boost accounts.
Step 3 - Yes, being attractive matters
This is an app where people judge you on apperance. You think looks don't matter? They absolutely do. I am not saying this app is worthless for you if you are below a 7/10 in looks, but you have to reel in your expectations. Women on these apps are pickier than they are in real life, so if you are a 5/10, don't go in expecting to match with 8s or higher.
Before dismissing Tinder and other apps all together, try to max out your looks first. Lose weight, get lean, lift, dress well, wear the right accessories, sport a good haircut/hairstyle, have a good facial care/skin care routine, and all of that. Doing all of this + taking good pictures will go a long way and can add points to your attractiveness.
Step 4 - Pictures are 90% of the battle
I repeat the Ultimate Tinder Maxim: IF YOU ARE NOT GETTING MATCHES, YOU HAVE BAD PICTURES. PERIOD.
You are going to sink or swim by your pictures, specifically, the quality of your pictures. Period. I consider myself an attractive man, but I failed at Tinder at first because my pictures sucked. Even if you are attractive, if you have shitty pictures, you are doomed. When I finally put some good pictures on my profile, it was night and day the number of matches and interest I was getting. It became like shooting fish in a barrel. I even got reported to Tinder as a catfish because women thought I was ripping my pictures from models and wasn't who I was in the pictures.
Now the term "good pictures" can mean so many different things. From my experience, here are the elements that make up good quality pictures:
Picture quality - There is a difference between a shitty cell phone front camera picture and a picture coming from a DSLR or expensive camera. This does matter. Front facing cell phone cameras generally have bad quality, bad apertures, bad lenses, and distort your face. The clearer and less grainy the picture, the better.
Lighting - Lighting matters. Pictures taken in the dark will suck because they will have high ISO settings, meaning more grainy. Pictures taken using indoor lighting often cast unnatural shadows with harsher lighting. Pictures taken with a camera flash add 7 years to your face and create all kinds of bad shadows and unappealing flashback. The best lighting is outdoors. The problem with outdoor photos is that generally the sun will be too bright, causing too many harsh shadows, overexposure and your eyes to squint. One solution is to take pictures when its cloudy. Or you can take pictures in the shade(but beware of surrounding glare that causes you to squint). The best time to take outdoor pictures is an hour after sunrise or before sunset, known as the golden hour. You can google "Golden Hour Calculator" to determine what time exactly this is for your location. During the golden hour you can take good pictures with soft, golden lighting and yet its not bright enough to cast bad shadows or make you squint. If you are wearing sunglasses it doesn't matter what time of day you take outdoor pics, but generally you don't want to have more than 1 or 2 pics in your Tinder picture album with sunglasses.
Setting - Where you take your pictures matter. A computer selfie at your desk in your room = shit. A picture of you outdoors somewhere interesting = good. The key here is variety. When I was doing the burner account competition check earlier, most guys are bad when it comes to variety of their settings. Find unique outdoor places to go to. One of my favorite is the roof of a parking garage downtown on weekends. There is no one up there, I don't have to pay to get in, and you get a badass view of the downtown skyline in the background. Parks, hiking trails, mountains, lakes, beaches, rivers, etc. all work. You can also be creative and get shots on the sidewalks, streets, etc.
Pose and Posture - You want your poses to be natural based on the setting your picture is taken. If you are taking a picture on a sidewalk, you obviously don't want your pose to be as if you are posing for the camera, you want your pose to be as if you were walking down the sidewalk. Go to YouTube and look up modeling poses for inspiration. And make sure to have good posture whatever pose you use.
Facial Expression - The key here is variety. You don't want all your photos to be of you smiling into the camera. You don't want all of your photos to be of you looking away from the camera with your mouth closed and a serious expression. I go with the rule of halves here. You want half of your pictures to be smiling, half not smiling. Then half of your pictures looking into the camera, and half looking away.
Composition - Where you are placed in the frame matters a lot. You see a lot of guys fail at this when checking out the competition. In my opinion there are only 2 acceptable compositions: Half body shots, and full body shots. Half body shots are generally shots from the waist or upper thigh up, full body has your entire body in the frame. But that is only half the battle - you don't want much open space between the top and bottom of the frame. Use the entire frame. This is a good example of what I mean in a full body shot, the concept for a half body shot is the same. Notice how the whole frame is used, not much gap above his head or below his shoes. Now here is an example of a bad full body shot - notice how much empty space there is above his head and below his feet. You want to avoid face only shots because they just aren't flattering and will hide your body, which you want to show off if you are lean, and also hides your fashion, which leads me to:
Fashion/Style - Your clothing choices matter and can greatly enhance your overall look if done right. You want your pictures to show off a diverse variety of well fitting stylish clothes. FIT is the key, more than style. They both greatly matter, but bad fit will ruin any style. A good style can't overcome bad fit. Go shopping to stores like J Crew and wear the smallest size you can that still fits, in a slim style cut if you can find it. Some good ideas for clothes to wear: Dark Wash Slim Jeans, Slim Chino Pants(Khaki is my favorite color), Flat Front Chino Shorts at 9 inch inseam or less, Slim Fit Casual Button Down Shirts, Polos, Well Fitting T-Shirts, Denim Button Downs, Denim Jackets, Bomber Jackets, Leather Jackets, Slim Dress Shirts, Nice Sweaters, Watches(you need to wear one in every photo), boots, dress shoes, loafers, nice sneakers, necklaces, pendants, and bracelets. NO - Cargo Shorts, Cargo Pants, tennis shoes, basketball shoes, "skater" shoes, flip flops/sandals, baggy clothes, hats, sweats, hoodies, logo or graphic shirts. You need to be wearing a wristwatch in all your pictures.
Hair - Make sure you put some effort into it, whatever you do. Find a good haircut/hairstyle for your face shape.
Pets - If you have a dog, probably a good idea to have a dog pic.
Motorcycle - If you have one, probably a good idea to have a pic of you on your bike
Step 5 - How to actually go about taking good pictures So I stated what makes a good picture. But how do you actually do it? There are 3 ways I recommend, all of which are viable and have their pros and cons.
The Friend With a Camera Approach
Find a friend to go along with you with a camera and have him/her take pictures of you in various places or settings. Ideally you'll want a friend with a good camera who knows a thing or two about how to take good pictures. Or you could go on Craigslist or something and hire a professional photographer but that can be a bit pricey.
Pros: Lots of possibilities, someone else controlling the camera means you don't have to set and forget the photo settings or placement, good for getting shots at busy places with lots of people without creating a distraction or scene(think downtown locations), cheapest approach
Cons: Less creative control over the pictures, can only be done when friend is available and in that certain time frame, not everyone has a friend who is available or willing to do this.
The Tripod Approach
This is where you buy a tripod to go with whatever camera you are using, set up the tripod and take pictures. I do have a nice camera and a tripod, and have used this approach, but it can be difficult to get right even though I have a remote controller for it because with nicer cameras, it's most ideal to have someone behind the camera to fine tune the controls for every shot.
Pros: Don't need someone else, can do everything on your own time, allows for unique locations to be shot
Cons: Can be expensive, not ideal for high traffic places, tripod can be unstable and knocked over by things like wind, some locations there isn't an ideal place to put the tripod, even with a timer or remote controller it can be difficult to get the right photo settings in terms of shutter speed, aperture and focus
The Drone Approach
This is personally the approach I have used over the past year to amazing results. Obviously, drones aren't cheap, but they are worth the investment. Not only can you get some good photos from some unique angles and take them anywhere, but it also gives you a fun hobby as well on the side. I've used both the DJI Spark and DJI Mavic Air drone for this. Both have good cameras, and even better, they have an interval setting meaning it will take a picture every 2 seconds. Meaning 30 pictures a minute. DJI Spark battery lasts about 12 minutes, and DJI Mavic Air lasts about 16-18 minutes. That means you can get 360-480 pictures per battery. Tell me you can't find at least one good picture? You can find a DJI Spark new for $350-$400 in stores or on eBay used for cheaper. Just make sure you get a quality drone, DJI is a good brand. The cheap $50-$100 drones you can get at Wal-Mart won't cut it.
Pros: Don't need another person, can get all kinds of unique angles/settings/locations you can't get with a tripod, can be controlled remotely, good picture quality once you get the settings right
Cons: Loud, not ideal at all for use amongst places with a lot of traffic/people so you have to find more isolated places, some locations are restricted for drone use, takes a while to learn how to dial in the photo settings like ISO, shutter speed and exposure value that flatter you the most, expensive
All 3 of these approaches are viable. But one of these 3 approaches have to be used if you want to have top tier photos. Getting your cell phone camera, leaning it up against something, setting the timer and running into place isn't going to cut it. Outstretched arm selfies won't cut it. Cropped group pics won't cut it. Mirror pics won't cut it. Yes, it takes time and effort, and for some of the approaches, investment, but it pays off. Do you want to succeed or not?
Step 6 - To shirtless ab pic or not to shirtless ab pic? From my experience, you can go either way. If you have a shitty body, are skinny or fat, and have no defined abs and vascularity, it won't work. If you have a good body with defined muscles, vein vascularity and a 6 pack, it won't hurt to have a shirtless picture in there. It's not always ideal, though. There are girls who will swipe left when they see a shirtless picture no matter what. I've found that shirtless pics work better when you are looking for hookups, not so much when you are looking for dating/something longer term.
If you want to use a shirtless pic, there is one rule: IT HAS TO LOOK CANDID. Shirtless mirror bathroom pic = NO. Shirtless gym selfie = NO. If it looks like you are posing for the picture, and therefore it was planned, its not going to work. It has to look like it was taken candidly, unplanned, as if you were doing something, and someone happened to take a picture of you. The shirtless picture I had the most success with was one of me at the park holding a football, I made it look like I was playing football, even though I was there by myself and used my drone to take the picture. However, I made it come across as extremely candid, even though my 6 pack and vein vascularity and muscles were showing off. Shirtless pics at the beach or pool also work.
Step 7 - Post Processing/Editing You don't want to just use the pictures as they are. You want to find your best ones and then edit them. Use editing software(Adobe Lightroom is good, the stock Windows photo software is good, I am sure iPhoto is good) to mess around with the pictures. Apply filters, change the brightness/contrast/clarity/saturation, and all of that. The key is to not go overboard with the filters and everything. You still want it to look natural. The editing will add to your photo, not make your photo. Women will know if your picture is edited too much. Edit it in a way where it looks a lot better than the original, but at the same time you can't tell it was actually edited.
Step 8 - Selecting Which Pictures to Use The generally key, as I have already stated, is variety. You want your 6 pictures to give a well rounded perspective of who you are. Variety in terms of poses, facial expressions, outfits, and locations.
Obviously you want to pick your 6 most flattering pictures. The best approach to use is to pick 6 locations and outfits and take a shit ton of pictures at all 6. Then pick the best from each group and there are your 6.
Your lead picture needs to be your best one. It needs to clearly show your face and your body, uncovered eyes(no sunglasses) with clothes on(no shirtless pics as your lead), by yourself(no group pics). Your last picture also needs to be a good one, as if a girl is swiping through your pics, will be her last impression before she decides to swipe right or left on you. Remember, she will judge you by your worst pic.
I'm not going to post my profile, but here is a breakdown of my pictures:
4 of 6 I am smiling
3 of 6 I am looking at the camera
2 of 6 I am wearing sunglasses
5 of 6 are full body shots, head to toe
All are taken outside
No shirtless pics that I am currently using
2 of 6 I am wearing flat front chino shorts, 2 of 6 I am wearing jeans, 1 of 6 I am wearing khaki chinos, 1 of 6 I am wearing dress pants
2 of 6 I am wearing a v neck t-shirt, 3 of 6 I am wearing a casual button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, 1 of 6 I am wearing a dress shirt with a tie
2 of 6 were taken in broad daylight(both sunglasses pics), 3 of 6 taken at sunset in the golden hour, 1 of 6 taken in broad daylight but in the shade
Locations Used: Beach Sand, Downtown Sidewalk, Work(Outside), Top Level of Downtown Parking Garage, Football Field, Side of Building
Poses Used: Sitting on Cooler, Leaning Against Pole, Leaning Against Wall, Walking With Football in Hand, Standing Straight Up Smiling Into the Camera, Looking Over Shoulder
No Group Pics or pics with others. Group pics are overrated. Yes, it shows you having fun with friends, but generally they are not flattering and the cropping you have to do ruins the quality. I'd rather have 100% control over my pictures from start to finish. If your pictures are good enough she won't give a shit if you are alone in all of them.
Step 9 - Your bio. Does it even matter? In general, your bio doesn't matter. She really only looks at your pictures which are all that matter. If your pictures are good enough, then she might glance at your profile just to make sure you are a real person.
Your bio will not help you at all. It can only hurt you. Since you have all to lose and nothing to gain, you need to keep your bio short and to the point. If you are over 6 feet tall, list your height. If you are 5'10, say you are 6 feet. Put where you are from, what part of town you live in, and about 3 or 4 things you like to do. Put the college you graduated from if you have graduated. If you have a cool job, put it in there, otherwise be either really vague with it or don't put it in there at all.
Example Profile that works: "6'1, from New York, living here in Florida in West Miami. Ohio State '13. Fishing, traveling, fitness, and more."
There. That's all you really need. Nothing in there that will scare anyone away or devalue you, but makes you look like a real person. Don't try to put anything witty or funny or out there. Just keep it simple.
Step 10 - Deploying your Profile and Using Tinder Don't set up your profile until you are absolutely ready to start with your full profile because once you set up your profile you are put in others stacks. If you already have an account, delete it so you can start over. Upload your pictures, write your bio, and where you go from here is up to you.
Be picky. Only swipe right on girls that you are certain are who they are in their profile. If she only has face shots, chances are she is fat. Remember the rule: "If you got it, flaunt it". Girls live by this. If they have a good body, they will show it off. If they have good tits or ass, it will be shown off. If it looks like they are hiding something, they are. Read her profile, don't just look at her pics. Chances are you might like her pics, but then you look at her profile and it will state she is a single mom. Generally, if you have been swiping a while and have reached the point of the stack where all the girls are ugly, and then you come across one that is hot, chances are she is either a bot or single mom. Because legit hot girls who aren't single moms or don't have major red flags will never be that far down the stack.
Being picky also helps your ELO score, which increases your chances of being shown at the top of the stacks of the more attractive women.
There are two trains of thought on Super Likes. One train is that its good, it will make her think longer about you. The other train is that its creepy and too much and shows her you are already too interested.
My take? Use them. I've had more good than bad from super likes. Not only that, but using a Super Like automatically puts you at the top of her stack, so you know you will be seen next time she logs on. Unless you have Tinder Gold, you only get one per day so use wisely.
I am a fan. I only recommend, however, using this on a month by month basis. I think its a good investment to use your first month. The queue which shows who has liked you is helpful and will help you gauge how good your pictures are. If its not filling up you have shitty pictures. Also the quality of girls liking you will also help you see what type of women is finding you attractive. Lastly it helps because it helps you ground yourself to reality. A lot of girls don't log into Tinder that much, so by seeing who has already liked you, you won't get your hopes up for girls in the stack who may or may not be active(Tinder hides profiles inactive more than 2 weeks).
If you are successful at Tinder I think its worth it to stay on Gold after your first month. I do. The passport feature is useful for traveling, as you can arrange meetups with girls before you even get there. This is just my opinion though. If you aren't successful, paying for Gold won't make you successful. The best way I can describe Tinder Gold is that its a valet for an already successful Tinder user, it just makes it easier. Seeing who has already liked you might sound like something you don't really need or need to pay for, and while I agree, its actually been more beneficial than I realized.
Regardless of whether or not you subscribe to Gold, I think everyone needs to try a boost at least once. A boost puts you at the top of the stack for everyone in your area for 30 minutes. This means you will be seen by everyone who logs on during that time. I get matches regardless but each time I boost it seems like I get a lot more. Boosts help because after a while, unless your ELO score is good, you fall farther and farther down the stacks of other girls Tinder stacks, and you won't be seen. Instead all she will see are high ELO accounts and new accounts getting their noob boost. Women swipe a lot less profiles than men do(since the attractive ones will match with almost everyone they swipe right on) so its vital to make sure you are showing up at the top of stacks.
Timing is important with boosts. From my experience, Wednesday at 7:15pm is the best time to use it. This is ideal because its before the weekend before plans are set. If you use it on Friday or Saturday girls already have plans.
You get a free boost every month if you have gold, otherwise its $4 each.
Obvious bot accounts are obvious. Their pictures are often cropped and low quality but of really attractive women in generic poses/settings. Their bios are often empty or extremely generic. And they often only have either 1, 3 or 4 pictures exactly. They are pretty easy to spot.
Instagram/Snapchat Follower Farmers, Sugar Daddy Seekers and Venmo Scams
You'll see girls on here who are clearly only doing it to rope in instagram/snapchat followers, or find a sugar daddy, or get money sent to them via Venmo.
Here is my take on them. Yes, that is what they are doing. However, for the right guy, they will throw that away. Use the Brad Pitt test here. If she saw Brad Pitt had matched with her on Tinder, you think she would just try to use him for Venmo money or to get an Instagram follow out of him? No way.
If you think you are attractive enough, go for it anyway. Generally these girls obviously fishing for Instagram Followers or Venmo money should be massive red flags automatically disqualifying them from anything above plate material, but its possible to bust through the massive shit test. I've done it multiple times.
Step 11 - You've matched, now what? So you have matched. Ideally with multiple women.
As successful as I am at this, I would still say only about 10% of women message me first(and many women who message you first will be bots if you were unable to detect them prior to swiping). You are going to have to do the initiation.
Fuck that shit about message timing, when to message her, etc. "If I message her too soon after matching she will think I am desperate!" No. Just message her when you feel like it.
The key to an opener is to be different, set the frame, use her name, and play on her emotions. I've watched girls use tinder before and pretty much every guy either opens them with a boring "Hey" or "Hi", or uses some really stupid cheesy pick up or sexual opener that is just awkward. None of that is different, none of it sets the frame in the guy's court, and none of it plays on her emotions in a positive way.
It has to be organic. Review her profile and pictures, and try to craft a message based on that. Don't compliment her physically(i.e. you're hot or you're cute), don't get sexual in the first message, or use a dumb pick up line.
Here is an example I used recently that worked. It was a profile of a nurse who said she worked the overnight shift and lets say her name was Anna.
"Anna, are you a Waffle House or IHOP kind of girl? Since I am guessing those are the 2 places I would have to choose from to take you with that schedule..."
See what I did here? I did a lot of things. I set the frame as one that I will be taking her out(not necessarily to Waffle House or IHOP). I crafted the message organically based on her profile, and I made her laugh with the Waffle House/IHOP reference since those places are pretty sketchy in the AM hours, but people secretly love those places. I also gave her a reason to respond.
Here is another example of a girl who had a picture of her bowling, lets say her name was Tina:
"Tina, if we go on a bowling date, I am not letting you use the bumpers, so you better learn how to bowl without them"
Again, I set the frame from the first message to one that I would be taking her out without asking her out. I teased her about her bowling skills and gave her a reason to respond(to defend her bowling skills). We did go on a bowling date when all was said and done.
It's a numbers game
You are going to have girls who don't respond. You are going to have girls who unmatch. You are going to have girls who take forever to respond. You are going to have girls who are just not into it even if they respond. It's really a numbers game. The more girls you open, the better chances you have at least one who goes through with it all. Don't get hung up on any one girl. Assume every girl you match with will ghost you. Assume every girl you talk to will eventually stop. Assume every girl who gives you her number and you set up a date/meet with will flake. Don't get invested. Persistence is the key.
I think this is where most guys get discouraged and come here to write their OMG TINDER IS SHIT posts. They have shitty pics, and only match with 1 or 2 girls, have no abundance, and when it doesn't work out with those 1 or 2 girls whether they don't respond, stop responding, flake, etc. they act like Tinder is shit and all women on there are shit. You have to remain persistent. Keep in mind the better you look, the better your pics are, the more attractive you are and better your text game is, the less likely she will flake, and the more likely she will respond and follow through. I can attest to that. Remember that girls have dozens of matches and are only going to bother with their best ones.
Step 12 - When to ask for her numbeask her out? So you have had a successful opener and started a conversation. When do you escalate to get her number or arrange a date/meet up?
Every girl is different, from what I have learned, so there is no one size fits all plan. Some girls want more rapport and chit chat before they are comfortable giving you their number or setting up a date. Others require less. Regardless, you need to at least try to get a number or set up a date in 5-6 messages or less. Remember, she has dozens of matches, with guys who are farther along the process than you probably are, so you have to shit or get off the pot eventually. Plus she will get bored if you don't go after what you want.
The best way to do it is to have the conversation naturally flow into you asking for her number or asking her out. Here is an example that I used, of a girl who actually messaged me first:
Her: Hey! How was your weekend?
Me: Pretty good. You?
Her: Nothing too exciting lol. Lots of work.
Me: Well we need to fix the nothing too exciting part. Let's go get some drinks, when are you free
See how I took her response and turned it into escalation. You already have the IOI, otherwise you wouldn't have matched, so why waste time? I did it on message #2. You need to look for the opening to make it flow naturally to asking for her number or asking her out. Sometimes that takes longer than 2 messages, but you get the idea. You don't want to go too early though, then you just come across as a playeneedy/desperate.
The worst thing you can do is just make her your pen pal and ask dozens of interview style questions without escalating. She is not an idiot, she knows what you are there for. If after 5-6 messages or so you still haven't found the opening to ask for her number or ask her out, just do it.
Step 13 - So you've got her number and set up a date, now what? Try to set up a date within 1-3 days of getting her numbeasking her out. Anything longer she will probably flake. The only times I have successfully set up dates longer in advance is when she was out of town.
From there you need to shut the fuck up and not contact her until the day of the date, where you confirm plans. Don't text her, don't become her penpal. All you can do at this point is hurt yourself.
If she initiates with you and texts you, respond to be polite, but space out your responses. I'm talking, take 12+ hours to respond. I had a girl who was all over me from the time we set up a date to the time we met up, always texting me. I didn't want to be rude so I would respond, and I thought that since she was the one initiating, I was fine. Wrong. We go out and then after the date she says she "wasn't feeling a connection". You'll never live up to the standard you set by texting her. You have nothing to gain and everything to lose. Resist the urge to text her until you meet up.
If she flakes, she flakes. It happens. Don't become invested. If she is truly interested she will propose a counter time. Just because she cancels doesn't mean she isn't interested. I had one cancel on me and I thought it was over and I needed to move on but she rescheduled with me.
Does this approach also work with Bumble? Yes. The difference is that she will open you, so you can take her opener and play with it. That doesn't mean its any easier or harder.
My problem with Bumble is that the userbase is smaller, and there are so many inactive profiles on there. Unlike Tinder, Bumble doesn't remove/hide profiles that are inactive. I was using Bumble and saw the profile of a girl I work with who was married a year ago. She said she hasn't logged on there since 2015.
Also you will match with girls on Bumble and they still won't message you. Again, girls get tons of matches so they will only message the cream of the crop. Become the cream.
The upside to Bumble is that the quality of girls are higher.
Conclusion and Final Thoughts
TindeBumble/Online Dating is 99% pictures. They have to be outstanding. Not good. Not great. Oustanding. How much you want to invest in getting outstanding pictures is ultimately up to you because it takes effort and time and in some cases money. Just remember. If you aren't getting matches, its your pictures. End of discussion. It's not Tinder screwing you over, its not shallow women only looking for validation, its not women having you outside of their Tinder preference settings, its not anything but your shitty ass pictures.
Your approach if you are looking for hookups and your approach if you are looking for something more long term has to be different.
It really is a numbers game. I know this sounds cliche but the more matches you get the more your odds are in favor of at least one working out. You get more matches by having good pictures and utilizing features like boost. Tinder might seem like a lost cause if you only get 5 matches and none of them work out. But if you have 50 or 500 matches you're going to have matches that work out, its the law of averages.
Don't get your hopes up on any one individual girl until you actually meet up with her in person. From there you apply TRP to prevent the onset of oneitis.
Don't match with a girl unless you are 100% certain she is who she is in her pictures. Read her entire bio and look at all her pics before matching to find red flags.
Tinder Gold in my opinion is useful if you are already successful at Tinder, but it won't turn you from unsuccessful to successful.
I've seen false advice given around TRP that the opener doesn't matter, if she is attracted to you she is attracted. While attraction does matter the most, you still have to give her a reason to engage with you, invoke her emotions and set the frame.
Shit or get off the pot. She has dozens of matches and dozens of guys doing the same thing you are doing. If you don't make a move, another guy will. Build some short rapport and then find an opening to ask for her numbeask her out.
There is inevitably going to be someone in the comment section saying you don't need Tinder or dating apps, all you need is day/night game, Tinder is shit. What if I told you, you could do both? mindblown.gif
Alright, this is the case as I watched it unfold. There's a lot of rumors, so I'll keep to facts and any commentary in parenthesis. I want to state like many of you, my interest in true crime revolves around criminal psychology, police tactics, the court system, and forensics. I did not and do not participate in speculation in when a child is missing, which was a painful aspect of this case to the Stauch family.
Background info; Al Stauch has two children (Gannon, 11 and Laina aged 8) with his previous wife, Landen. Al is in the military. In the divorce Al was awarded full custody and in 2015 married Leticia, who has one 17 year old daughter, Harley. Leticia goes by Tee, and Gannon sometimes goes by G. The Stauch family was previously stationed in South Carolina, where Landen stayed after the divorce.
Al, Tee, Harley, Gannon and Laila all live in a middle to upper class suburban development of Colorado springs.
There are rumors Al and Tee had been talking divorce in mid January. Tee applied for flight stewardess positions out of Colorado springs and Miami. She also applied for a teaching job that she was offered, but the offer was rescended after some of her qualifications and previous work experience were inconsistent.
Al was out of state early into a temporary deployment for his job in January. The deployment was supposed to be for a few months which is not uncommon for his job.
Tee reported on the weekend of January 25th & 26th she went hiking with Gannon solo to a very popular trail head, Garden of the Gods. She reported on Monday he didn't feel well so she kept him home. She also reported that she went to go look at a bike being sold off of Craiglist in an isolated area of Douglas county and did not take her phone that weekend. She had her apple watch on that did record her Geo data. She reported she did not purchase the bike.
On Monday Tee reported Gannon went to a friend's house between 330 and 4. She said she did not know the exact time as she was working out and did not hear the door. He was reported missing to the police at about 6:45pm.
Al Stauch takes emergency leave and flies home. Landen, Gannons biological mother, also flies into Colorado springs as well. He invites his ex wife, landen, to stay at his house while they search for their son. Tee has an issue with this and they have a fight. Tee goes to stay in a hotel room with her daughteAl kicks her out.
Colorado springs has a very active search and rescue community as hikers go missing quite often in the extensive wilderness of the Rocky mountains. Hundreds of volunteers assemble. Drones with heat and infared capabilities, search dogs are used.
A Facebook group is created to coordinate search efforts and keep sightings (if any) posted in one area. Over 200 people gather and search the neighborhoods. Posters are put up and word spread quickly. Local small businesses begin raising money for search efforts as well.
Al notes to police a brown suitcase is missing. One of the last things searched in Gannons phone was something along the lines of 'can my parents track my phone if it is off' (I don't recall exact wording, this was in an early report. I can't find the link).
Police find blood in the garage and in the trunk of Leticias red truck. She explains Gannon cut his foot on some woodworking tools in the garage and she set him on the trunk to bandage it earlier that weekend. Police also find a 'saucer sized' pool of blood in Gannons room. Tee cannot explain this. Police confiscate her truck for forensics. Leticia immediately rents a car. the rental car is returned a day later with 955 miles on it.
As search efforts intensify, Leticias absence in the search parties are pointedly noticed. The Facebook group becomes a source of rumors and misinformation. People are extremely suspicious of Tee. Several YouTubers pick up the story. One of them edits a video of Tee disciplining Gannon that Tee had posted to Facebook previously, adding the audio 'I'm bleeding' in a voice similar to Gannons at the end.
Gannons disappearance is escalated to a missing and endangered person.
Rumors intensify about Tee's involvement. She is not seen anywhere around Colorado springs for a few days. Her absence is pointedly noticed.
As searches intensify, a wood 2x4 and sock soaked with Gannons blood are found along isolated roads in Douglas county. Leticia explains they flew out of the back of her truck via the wind on their own while she was going to look at the Craigslist bike.
Leticia urges people on Facebook to look out for strange cars that shouldn't be in the area and is vocal of her belief that Gannon was trafficked. Police immediately issue a statement they have no reason to believe the public is in danger of kidnappers.
Leticia gives an interview with local channel 11 to address 'rumors' in the Facebook group. Link (here) https://youtu.be/9Um2pinuI0c
she addresses the 'people on the internet'.
Neighbors search their ring cameras and find a video of Leticia getting into her truck with Gannon at 10:13am on Monday Feb 27th. Gannon is walking slowly. Leticia returns just after 2pm alone. There is no video of Gannon leaving the house to walk to a friend's in the timeline Tee gives.
Tee's Facebook has a post about a trump rally in Florida which was later deleted.
Tee changed her Facebook profile to a picture of Gannon waving goodbye. Landen found this hurtful and distasteful, many demand she take it down. In a leaked phone call posted to YouTube Tee states it is her right to post anything she likes to her Facebook and speculates why people don't assume he is waving hello instead of goodbye.
Reference: https://www.websleuths.com/forums/threads/co-gannon-stauch-11-colorado-springs-lorson-ranch-el-paso-county-27-jan-2020-endangered-22.509096/page-27 https://www.crimeonline.com/2020/02/29/ganoon-stauch-stepmom-explains-rental-car-as-search-for-missing-colorado-boy-continues-exclusive-part-2/
Landen, Al and Laina make a video urging Gannon to come home. Landen makes a statement that she and Al are back together, one of Gannon's strongest desires.*
*Edit, some have interpreted Landen's statement of being 'together' not to mean romantically but in that they are working together to bring Gannon home. Watch the video to make your own assessment: https://youtu.be/nOMIS33bGBU
A local reservoir is searched that was previously frozen. Gannon is not found.
Colorado has had a snow storm and some severe temperatures. 80+ volunteers are still gathering regularly to look for Gannon. In the organizesearch Facebook group things get catty. There was a 'fake' (?) profile attacking people suspicious of Tee/while also defending Tee. the identity of the owner of the profile was not verified.
Leticia Stauch releases this statement;
"First and foremost, I would like to thank all agencies, volunteers, and community members who are working diligently and praying endlessly to bring Gannon home safe. Thank you to my husband who has stayed strong through this and protected our family to the best of his ability and our immediate & extended family members throughout the east coast. To Gannon, please come home soon because your daddy is waiting to watch the new Sonic movie that comes out this week and the cool shirt I got you to wear to the theatre is in your closet.
Social Media has been devastating from the harsh comments, speculations, threats, cyber bullying, etc. It has been a challenge when people are trying to run you off the road, waiting outside your hotel, threatening to kill you, etc. I encourage the Sheriff’s Office to take down those pages that promote negative behavior and violence. Let’s Do what Gannon would do. Be Kind to one another! We all have engaged in something crazy online at some point but Gannon would want everyone to get along and to focus on finding him. I know that many people have kids and are invested in this because it hits close to home for them. I would like to think that overall most people are genuine and want to do everything in their power to find G. With that being sad, Please take a step back for a moment and let me explain to you a few details that were not released. For example, just like the video that was leaked, there are additional details that were hidden due to 1) the department doing its job 2) the effects of social media and how some individuals would criticize or hinder the investigation. I chose to listen, I didn’t leak videos or information. But at this time it’s getting later in the process and we just want Gannon home. I feel the need to fill in some gaps. Now let me stress this, POLICE have known this since the first interview. Saturday Night, G was helping me unload in the garage and cut his foot because there are a lot of tools because Albert does woodworking. He sat on the edge of the car and we bandaged it up. He was good to go. He always loves helping his dad in the garage build things like his LEGO tables and the flower pot they built for me as a gift. After this, I noticed G kept going to the side of the house. He told me he was checking to see if the gate was locked because he was the only one with a gate key. It made him proud to be the man of the house while Albert was away. Fast forward, we did a hike on Sunday (cleared), and shopping on Monday ( cleared as well for him getting out of the other side). Please don’t think for a second that there isn’t enough of technology to determine shadows and movement around the truck. There was also proof from my phone that we had taken a selfie in the truck in our driveway that was time stamped. We always send pictures to Albert when we are out and about or when he is away. That can be scanned for actual time verification. Last, from day one the Sheriff's office has known a description of the person/friend whom Gannon left with. I explained to them and provided evidence. They had information about G having the key to go out the side gate. Last they have more in-depth details that go along with this pointing to who sent the person or why he may have come. Again, I repeat they have had this Initially and I was asked to keep quiet about it so they could have the best shot at doing their job and bringing G home. The last thing that they needed was a hindrance to their investigation. I encourage you to think of any suspicious cars that may have been in the area watching a few days prior and keep praying for G! Tecia Stauch"
February 16th (ish)
Al and Landen request Tee stop making statements to media.
Somewhere around this time Tee leaves to go be with family Myrtle Beach. Harley flies solo, and Tee drives an extended route along the southern portion of the United States that adds several hours to her drive (28hr drive total, most direct route is 24hrs)
Search for Gannon is officially called off. Many volunteers continue searching unofficially.
An arrest warrant is issued for Leticia Stauch.
El paso county sheriff releases statement of Tee's arrest charges of first degree murder, tampering with a body, and child abuse that results in the death of a child hunger the age of 12.
There is a sealed affidavit on the specfics of the case.
Several YouTubers try to monetize their assessment of the case and in doing so spread rumors without fact checking. Police and Al both allude to their disapproval of this in various statements.
Landen and Al release an emotional statement. (Link) https://youtu.be/GOw6EVMILHo
Tee is extradited from South Carolina to Colorado springs. She allegedly attacks the deputy escorting her and is held in Kansas for 12 hours.
An unidentified body in a brown suitcase is found beneath a bridge in Florida just outside Pensacola.
The body is tentatively identified as Gannon Stauch. Additional charges of first degree murder with a deadly weapon (gun, knife and blunt object are all added to the charges separately). Police request sightings of Leticia Stauch February 2-3rd in Florida.
A YouTuber tries to call the youngest Stauch daughter to get more information on the case. Al Stauch responds to this vaguely in a statement to leave his 'innocent, broken hearted daughter alone'.
Landen Stauch releases a statement.
( What I think happened; Sunday January 26th Leticia hit Gannon with a 2x4 in the garage in a fit of rage and did more damage than she intended. Possibly a head wound which bleeds a lot. It didn't clot well and he continued to bleed in his room. I believe she want through the side gate to get a hose to clean up the garage. She immediately realized she couldn't cover up the damage to Gannon without medical attention. So she kept Gannon home from school Monday and came up with a plan overnight. I believe Harley witnessed this event.
I believe Tee probably lied to Gannon about getting medical attention to get him willingly into the car. I believe she took him to an isolated area in Douglas county and shot him. I believe she either dismembered him to make him fit in a suitcase, or used the knife to bleed him out. This would explain the lack of excessive blood. I believe she stashed him nearby and then dumped evidence along the rural roads.
She didn't anticipate the reaction from the community. Within a day or two I believe she moved him away from the searches, possibly in New Mexico with the rental car.
I believe on her trip February 2-3rd she moved him a second time to Florida on her way up to South Carolina to play into the human trafficking theory.
I believe Harley came forward about witnessing the initial attack, which explains the extremely specfic charges. It also explains why the DA would pursue a no body case. This case is very similar to the Susan Powell case which they couldn't confidently pursue without a body).
Other details worth interest/noting:
Some have stated Tee Stauch was a member of a Chris Watts support group on Facebook. Tee's Facebook profile has been disabled so this can't be substantiated.
the-sun.com reported Leticia had a criminal history of theft and domestic violence.
It was soon after [Leticia] graduated high school in 2001 that she was arrested for stealing a car in North Carolina.
The Robesonian reported at the time that she "was found guilty of felony larceny which was reduced to misdemeanor unauthorized use of a vehicle." For that offense, Letecia was sentenced to 45 days in jail but given credit for time served. She was also put on probation for 18 months and order to pay just over $1,000. That same year she was also charged with communicating threats and simple assault, but those counts seemed to be dropped as part of her deal with prosecutors in the felony larceny case, court docs show. It was also traffic offenses that got Letecia picked up in Virginia a few years later, but she was able to get off after paying a fine for these minor offenses, according to court records. Her next arrest was in 2010, by which time she was going by Letecia Hunt. The newly-married teacher, who had graduated from Liberty University by then, was cited for domestic violence and domestic abuse in Horry County, South Carolina, court docs show."
There are a few dates I was mistaken on, I had trouble nailing them down as publishing dates varied from site to site. I've encouraged anyone who sees a mistake to give an edit, as apparently a news source wants to pick up this timeline for their website. I requested they wait a couple days so anyone here who sees a mistake can give correction.
My main references were https://abcnews.go.com/US/disappearance-gannon-stauch-timeline-case/story?id=69052881 https://www.koaa.com/news/covering-colorado/timeline-from-gannons-disappearance-to-an-arrest https://www.crimeonline.com/2020/02/18/gannon-stauch-timeline-of-missing-colorado-boy-who-mysteriously-vanished-over-20-days-ago/ https://www.kktv.com/content/news/Sheriffs-Office-searching-for-missing-11-year-old-boy-567360661.html
I posted a computer for sale on craigslist and then someone sent me a text saying that they want it. However, when they sent me the money, the mail confirmation went into my spam folder. And the address that came with the confirmation email was also similar to the one that apparently scammed tons of people?(in is in Miami Florida). And here is the most suspicious part. I priced the computer for $570, but the guy offered $870 for overnight shipping, claiming to be a Christmas present. I thought all this was very suspicious so I rejected the offer. But now the guy keeps telling me how he already sent the money and I am required to get the package shipped out and give paypal the tracking number? I am a new user to paypal but I didn't know that that was required. What do you guys think, is this legit or a scam? Should I accept his offer?
I am 35 have 10+ years of experience working in Film in Florida and own my own lighting and camera. Is the job prospects good for me if I come to New York. All of my work is freelance work meaning its all cash jobs. Under the table type work but I am looking to go above table. I have two certificates, one in Cinema Production and the other in Media Communications, (Social Media Strategy Public Relations documents, newsletters, etc)
Are the prospects of getting hired any good in NYC. And do the certificates hold any wait what so ever for actually being hired on. I even interned at a small studio here in New Port Richey so I have studio experience as a Production Assistant and I know that the media world is cut throat, its like that in Clearwater and St. Pete, especially in Miami and Orlando Florida. Any tips and or recommendations would be appreciated on how to go about gaining an entry level job in a studio. I already know that I will be looking for independent film projects through Craigslist to try and make a daily or weekly cash value as I have found several independent projects looking for people to DP or CO and some ask for people who own their own equipment although these I am cautious on because of thieves. Someone tried to steal my gear here in Florida while I was going to the set.
Also, is it a viable option to stay with my cousin as long as I agree to pay some rent and utilities? I do not know if this is allowed or not it would be like an AirBnb but shes family so I don't think its restricted?
Hi, first time ever posting on reddit and jumping straight in. I'm assuming that it would be okay to post here looking for possible comrades here in the Central Florida area around Polk, Tampa and Orlando.
For the past few years, Polk County has been seeing some political opposition popping up in the region against both Fed and local governments. I and my roommate have been participating in political activities, and the people we get involved with are good people, but we've found that everybody else thus far seems to - unfortunately - still have too much faith in the system. We can't really talk to them about more radical subjects and many are much older than us so we can't really hang out like we'd like to either.
In an attempt to remedy this, I've been previously posting on Craigslist and you can guess how well that went. Now I'm here.
So brass tax, our interests:
- Listening to music groups [like Rage Against the Machine, System of a Down, Ghostmane, Prophets of Rage, Mushroomhead, Clawfinger, Dead Kennedys, Public Enemy, Death Grips, Mastadon, Flobots, etc...]
- Watching movies and shows [like Defiance, Spartacus: Blood and Sand, Cloverfield, Inglorious Basterds, Miami Connection, The Last Castle, Dear White People, Sorry to Bother You, Deliverance, The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, Get Out, etc...]
- Self-defense Training
- Studying and Sharing Political Philosophy, Strategy and Tactics
- Studying and Practicing Survivalism
- Studying and Practicing Sustainability
- Environmentalism (Whenever we can)
If you are interested, we would like to meet up in person to talk first. Not all too sure how to safely share contact info on reddit though. If anyone knows let me know, otherwise I'll find out myself.
When my fiancé and I got engaged, we wanted to have a giant party with all of our friends, but somehow not break the bank doing it. We worked really hard to keep the cost low (even though we didn't make it under 10K), and hopefully some of these tips are useful to you.
A few notes.
This wedding took place in a small town in Florida.
We did not personally pay for some of these things, but I put them all together because what do you care that someone covered the appetizers for us? Everything is listed as if we paid for it.
This budget includes no substantial gifts or favors (we don’t have a florist cousin or a photographer aunt)- I guess other than a friend officiating.
Also, this may be tacky to say but the reminder might be helpful - the more guests you invite the more gifts you get. By having a big but cheap wedding, we got most of our costs back as registry items or cash.
Ceremony location- $700. We had our ceremony at a public park on the river. We asked a friend to officiate, which was a great call (he did SUCH a good job!). The location included amphitheater seating, so we didn’t have to provide anything extra, and it made a great place for pictures. Photo
Venue- $4,000 We wanted somewhere HUGE, so we could fit as many guests as we wanted. We used a seaplane hanger! It was amazing, but included absolutely nothing, so $800 for the hanger quickly became $1800 after we had to get a restroom trailer, and then $3,200 after renting all furniture, and finally $4,000 after paying for massive instillation of string lighting (definitely a place where the fat could have been cut on the budget, but I just LOVED them). Photo
Invitations- $210 (including stamps). I used invitation templates
I found in this group, printed them at staples, and cut them myself for both the invitations (invite, details card and RSVP card- which asked for an online RSVP) and save the dates. Admittedly it was really time consuming, so it wouldn’t be the worst thing to spend a couple more dollars and get them from Vistaprint or minted or something.
Appetizers- $900. A local wine and cheese shop made and arranged a huge charcuterie spread!
Dinner- $1400. This was one of our biggest savings. We had three giant paellas which fed all 175 of our guests very inexpensively and super deliciously. This also included salad and bread. We got it from Don Paella
in Miami, but there are paella caterers all over. Photo
Drinks- $1200. This was a big area of savings for us because we weren’t required to have a bar tender. We bought inexpensive wine (like super cheap, and wine snobs were happy- no one can tell the difference) and decent craft beer from Sams and ABC, plus 2 big bottles of liquor from ABC. The beer was served in the cans, with personalized cozies (150 for $60 on black Friday), and the wine was plastic cups from Sams. I also got plastic shot glasses from Amazon for $15. The beer was displayed in a boat my family owned, using coolers (which we returned…admittedly a bit sketchy, but we made sure they were really clean when we returned them and even offered to out them back ourselves).
Waitstaff- $600. We had three boys my husband had coached help out the day of the wedding. They helped set up, pour wine, and clear, and clean up.
Tableware- $120 We bought plastic plates and silverware from Sams. They looked great and saved us having to worry about anyone breaking a plate on the way to the buffet.
Flowers- $350. I tried several things to make it cheaper, but ultimately didn’t love any. You can get silk flowers at www.somethingborrowedblooms.com
, but I wanted bright flowers and didn’t love their options. You can get bouquets from Sams
or Costco, but it wasn’t much cheaper. I ended up going with a florist, just shopping around to find a good deal.
Dress- $340 (will resell, hopefully for close to the total price). I went to a bridal appointment to get an idea of what I liked, then found it on craigslist for $250. I got a “petticoat” (poofy thing for underneath?) on facebook marketplace for $20, a belt for $15 on Amazon, and got it hemmed for $55. I borrowed my veil (they are the easiest thing to borrow!) and wore shoes I already owned. Picture
Suit- $150 (I think…) from the Black tux. Both bridesmaids and groomsmen paid for their own outfits, but we made sure to pick inexpensive options (my dresses were $60).
Hair and make-up- $150. I paid for my own hair and make-up, and my bridesmaids paid for their own. We had an option for a $40 blow-out and $50 make-up for them, so it wasn’t outrageous for those who wanted it, and I felt ok about it since the dresses had been so inexpensive. I found thumbtack.com really useful, but ended up option for a local girl.
Table décor- $90 (plan to resell). We made runners entirely from leaves and flowers in my neighbors’ yards! We used $2 a strand fairy lights from Sams, table numbers from my wedding coordinator, and votives from facebook marketplace. So with 16 tables, this was less than 6 bucks a table. Lots of pictures
Other DIY’s $20- I made signs for the wedding by modifying the invitation template, DIYed our seating chart, and made a DIY map for people to pin where they came from.
Cake- $200. We got 8 flavors of cakes from TooJays (a deli chain) that our guests LOVED for $160!! I also DIYed (what I thought were) really cute flavor cards. We bought and then returned to Target cakestands (again, slightly sketchy, I know). We also got a $40 2 tier cake from Sams for cutting, and I DIYed our toppers (my husband and I met in high school when we both won a race and mixed up the male and female trophy! Its my favorite story) Photo
Wedding coordinator- $1200. This felt like a crazy splurge to me, but there were so many moving pieces I just couldn’t have done it without her. She was worth her weight in gold.
DJ- $700- We shopped around and got a DJ as cheaply as we could. I was very VERY specific with him about what we wanted, so there wasn’t much room for him to mess things up. For coordinating the evening, I really felt like he was necessary.
Photographer- $800. We shopped around a lot for an inexpensive photographer who could still work a full 8 hours and were really happy with our choice. A family friend volunteered to take video, so we had that, otherwise we wouldn’t have paid for a videographer.
Nursery Rentals- $300. For decoration, we were able to rent plants from a nearby nursery for super cheap! We got tons of palm trees.
Transportation- $200. We had a 12 passenger van we rented for the day taking people around, with my mom’s boyfriend driving before the wedding, and one of the paid helpers driving after. Everything was within a 1 mile radium (hotel, ceremony, hanger) so it was easy to make multiple trips).
Morning after breakfast- $300. The Hampton Inn where everyone was staying included the meeting room where the breakfast was held, and tables and chairs (we had 30 rooms booked, so they sorta owed us). We got $200 worth of pastries from a local bakery (I said I was ok with day old stuff, so we got an INSANE amount of pastries; we were eating them for a week after), and $100 worth of bagels with lox and cream cheese. The hotel had free breakfast for the guests, which they said it was fine for everyone to enjoy as well.
Ok. Now that we are here I guess I’ll explain. I am a 13 year old kid who as of late has been rather interested in modeling.
I am rather confident in my appearance, not gonna lie about that. Obviously I have some flaws, but I think I’d be able to deal with them.
Currently living in Plantation, Florida. Not far from Miami (maybe half an hour). But I may be moving within the year. (Skip this part if you don’t care about location.) We haven’t decided quite yet but there is a high chance we move to Maryland. It’s either there or we stay here.
I know a photographer that could help us make a portfolio, and my mom has actually talked about trying to go to an open call the next time we get a chance. Although I’m fairly certain she was joking, the idea is in her head.
I wanna say I’m 5’6 if I remember correctly, that might be off a little bit though. Last time I checked I weighed around 120lbs. I like to think of myself as a little different when it comes to my looks. I’m mixed (White/Black) with long and curly hair. My eyes are brown and I think my body is built ok. I’m not like super buff or anything but I’m in shape.
Problem is I’m not entirely sure how to approach an agency, or if I should at all. Should I try reaching out to local fashion stores to see if they need someone? Or could I go to Craigslist and try to find an ad looking for models? All advice is appreciated.
I haven’t told my mom this is something that I’m genuinely interested in, I made it seem like this was something I wanted to do when she joked about it but I’d guess she thought I was joking too. I’d like to do my research before actually approaching her with it.
I’m not sure what else I’d put in a post like this, just ask a question and you’ll (hopefully) get a decent answer.
I’m not really expecting many (or any) response, but if you do, thank you!
Hello fellow ravers! I hope you are as excited for March as I am. I just wanted to put together a few tips for those who are trying to do this Ultra trip smart, safe and cheap. This may not be for everyone, but there are many ways to save money and have just as good of an experience.
Tickets: The safest way to get a ticket is through Ultra directly. That being said, it's not always the cheapest option. There are plenty of platforms that you can get under retail value tickets sold by people that can no longer attend the festival. With that also comes scammers so you really need to be careful. If you decide to buy a ticket from Craigslist or on-site at the festival, make sure you know what you are looking at. Try to have a known legit ticket with you so you can compare. If you buy the ticket on the streets of Miami, ask for that person to walk to the front of the gate with you until your ticket gets scanned.
Flight: I strongly suggest booking a flight as early as possible. The longer you wait the more you will pay. Also, for people coming from the north, plan on getting to Florida at least a day early. I'm from the New England area, and last year we had a winter storm that was delaying flights left and right. Give yourself some leeway and get there (at least) a day early in case something happens. Also its a good idea to look into flights into Ft. Lauderdale, it's only a 40 minute or so drive to Miami and you will most likely save yourself a couple hundred bucks on flights. I personally will be flying in Jacksonville and driving down with a friend, and this should save me a good amount of money.
Hotel/Air BnB: There are cheap options on hotels. I just booked a two bedroom hotel for three nights for under 400 total the entire three nights. If you have 4 people that you are going to Ultra with, that's under $100 per person for hotel, which is a really good deal. We are staying near the airport and its really not worth paying hundreds more to be closer to downtown. A buddy of mine is from Florida so we have the luxury of having a car to drive downtown. The drive is only about 20 or so minutes from the airport. Having a sober man daily, and splitting the costs of parking the car in a garage, we end up saving a ton of money on our hotel and Uber fees. As for Air BnB, I have had nothing but horror stories come of these. A lot of the time, the people renting out these houses are not aware of which weekend Ultra is until last minute. At that point they are prone to canceling on you, relisting the Air BnB and then skyrocketing the price. So if you are looking into Air BnB's and the price seems too good to be true, don't be surprised if you get cancelled on a week or two before Ultra.
In Festival Expenses: My best advice here is to set a budget and stick with it. It can definitely get pricey inside between food, beer and Ultra gear. Bring cash and try your best to stick to your planned budget. If you plan to just eat a meal or two and shy away from the beer, you can definitely get away with under 30 dollars a day inside.