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2020.08.28 18:09 HaulA28Augl Top Ten G-ay S-ex Da-ting New

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2020.08.24 13:06 Megan_Dawn R/FANTASY'S 2020 TOP LGBTQA+ BOOKS VOTING RESULTS

The 2020 top LGBTQA+ voting results post is never late, nor is it early. It arrives precisely when it means to. Which is now, apparently. I do appreciate the patience everyone, and next year I promise not to hold the voting at the height of a pandemic and the same week I get a copy of animal crossing (hit me up if you wanna visit my island!).
The voting post can be found here, and the database of collated votes is here. Please note that I can only vouch for the books that actually made it into this post; there could be books in the database that don't fit at all.
So here we have it! Our sub's favourite books featuring a main POV character who lands somewhere on the LGBTQA+ spectrum. Like any good mother I couldn't possibly play favourites (The Tarot Sequence. The Tarot Sequence is my favourite), I'm just so pleased to see so many fantastic books in one place, and even more excited to dive into the ones that are new to me! Weep for our TBRs, friends. Weep for them.
29 votes
This Is How You Lose The Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone Lesbian
When two elite warriors— standing on opposing sides of a war stretching across space and time— become penpals, the rivalry between them starts to shift into something else.
27 votes
Wayfarers by Becky Chambers Lesbian
A young woman hiding one or two secrets takes a job on an old spaceship, and discovers that sometimes families aren’t made; they’re found.
25 votes
The Locked Tomb by Tamsyn Muir Lesbian
The Emperor needs a necromancer, and Harrowhark , Reverend Daughter of the Ninth House and bone witch extraordinaire, would super like to be that necromancer. But without Gideon, she’ll fail. And Gideon... is currently packing up her dirty magazines and planning an escape…
21 votes
The Masquerade by Seth Dickinson Lesbian
When you’re as crazy smart as Baru Cormorant the issue is not will you be able to rise to the top of the society that colonised your people and take them down from the inside, it’s will you be able to do without becoming a monster yourself? (No. The answer is no).
20 votes
The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller Gay
A retelling Achilles’ ill-fated destiny with Troy, told from Patroclus’ pov. Very beautiful. Much heartbreak.
17 votes
The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon Lesbian
An absolute honking chonker of a book full of wonderfully detailed worldbuilding, if that’s your thing. And also an unwed queen beset on all sides by assassins, and the forbidden-magic wielding lady-in-waiting who’s keeping her alive. You know. If that’s your thing.
Machineries of Empire by Yoon Ha Lee Gay, Lesbian & Trans
Look, I know it’s not great that one of your space fortresses is rebelling, I’m just saying that taking a promising soldier and forcing her to share her body with the resurrected spirit of the brilliant and genocidal general you’ve had locked away for a few centuries is maybe - maybe - not your best plan.
16 votes
The Tarot Sequence by KD Edwards Gay
Where is Addam, missing scion of the Judgement Court? This is a mystery Rune St. John, last scion of Sun Court, has been paid to solve. Other mysteries are too big for money; like who killed Rune’s father and destroyed Sun Court all those years ago? And also, why is Addam so handsome? How did he become so charming? Mysteries, mysteries.
14 votes
A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine Lesbian
An ambassador to a sprawling empire must solve the murder of her predecessor before she meets the same fate. Thankfully a version of the murdered man has been reconstructed from his memories and implanted in her mind. Helpful! Unfortunately the memories used were very outdated. Less helpful!
Kushiel’s Legacy by Jacqueline Carey Bi
A courtesan-spy cursed/blessed by her god to find pleasure in pain and a prudish warrior-priest go through all kinds of hell to save their homeland from traitors, but the real battle is the one against their feelings for each other. (And also the persistent idea that this trilogy is all sex when really it’s mostly politics with a little sex, and even then it’s still mostly politics).
Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo Gay
Did somebody say… heist?? Kaz Brekker is putting together a team for a job that could set them all up for life, if all the tragic backstories and shocking betrayals and sexual tensions could maybe stop getting in the way for just five minutes.
The Craft Sequence by Max Gladstone Lesbian & Trans
This is the series with necromancer attorneys. I mean, I don’t know what else you want from me here. Necromancer. Attorneys.
13 votes
The Shadow Campaigns by Django Wexler Lesbian
We have Marcus, an experienced but tired Captain of a foreign outpost. We have Winter, a green but gifted soldier with some field promotions in his ( well, hers, but shhhh, that’s a secret) future. And last comes Janus, the brilliant but maybe a little mad Colonel who is above sharing his true agenda, but not above maybe getting all them killed in the name of it.
Wayward Children by Seanan McGuire Asexual and trans
This one goes out to all you kids that were transported to fantasy words, and then spat back out on earth once the adventuring was done.
12 votes
The Raven Tower by Ann Leckie Trans
There’s a rock, and there’s the God of that rock, and the endless time that stretches behind and before them, and the tangled feuds the other Gods are constantly mired in that they stay clear of. Or at least, that’s what they’ve always done. Until now.
The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater Gay and Bi
Four teens in rural Virginia search for a buried Welsh king, but maybe the real Welsh king is the friends we make along the way.
The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune Gay
A Case Worker at the Department in Charge Of Magical Youth must travel to an island orphanage and determine if the handful of misfit children there (gnome, a sprite, a wyvern, an unidentifiable green blob, a were-Pomeranian, and the Antichrist) are likely to bring about the end of days or not. He must also determine what it is he feels for their charming caretaker.
11 votes
Arcane Ascension by Andrew Rowe Asexual
If you can reach the top of the colossal Serpent Spire— which is to say, if you can survive all the traps and monsters and shifting rooms — you get magical powers and the boon of a Goddess and all sorts of neat shit. Five years ago Corin’s brother entered the tower and didn’t come out again. Now Corin is heading inside to bring him back.
Tensorate by JY Yang Gay, trans and non-binary
A prophet stands on one side of a rebellion and on the other; her brother, who maybe can’t know the future like she does, but who knows that what matters more is changing the right now.
The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K Le Guin Non-binary
A human emissary travels to an alien world — where the inhabitants can choose and change their gender at will— in order to convince them to join an intergalactic civilisation.
10 votes
The Kingston Cycle by CL Polk Gay and Lesbian
One good thing about war is that it’s easy enough to fake your own death and start a new life back home where your powerful family can’t use you for your magic. Of course in order for this to be a successful endeavour it helps to keep your head down and not start investigating a murder. If you absolutely must investigate a murder for the love of god don’t do with a mysterious and charming and attention-drawing man by your side. But ok I get it he really is very good looking. Just no high-speed bicycle chases, ok? …Ok?!
The Riverside Books by Ellen Kushner Bi
The nobles of Riverside are so witty and polite, but manners can only take one so far. If you find your tongue just isn’t cutting enough it might be time to head into the slums and find yourself a swordsman to dual on your behalf. Richard St. Vier is the very best of them, but it’s not his swordfighting prowess that has young nobleman Alec attached to his side…
9 votes
A Charm of Magpies by KJ Charles Gay
It takes the deaths of his father and brother to bring Lucien back to England after twenty years, and imagine his disquiet to learn he’s not just inherited his father’s wealth, but his enemies too. He requires magical protection, and it’s just bad luck really that the man he hires has more reason than anyone else to hate Lucien’s family.
The Books of Raksura by Martha Wells Bi
Moon grows up believing he is the last of his kind, until he stumbles upon others and finds out he’s basically royalty. He also finds out his people are super matriarchal, and he’s expected to be a bit more wilting flower and a bit less… feral loner who’s well-used to gutting monsters with his bare claws? Still, If he can let go of his bone-deep abandonment issues for even just one second he might realise he’s found the family he always wanted.
In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan Bi
Eliot is only a child when he is recruited to a magical military academy. One problem though — well, ok, more than one problem. For example, a quill and ink is hideously impractical and there’s only so many pens one carry back from summer break, especially when you’re also trying to smuggle a coffee machine… But aside from all that, there’s the fact that this is an military academy and Eliot is a pacifist. And unfortunately for the war effort he’s also a stubborn little shit.
8 votes
The Deeds of Paksenarrion by Elizabeth Moon Asexual
Paks is eighteen and headstrong when she flees a marriage arranged by her father and joins a mercenary company, and in the amidst all the obstacles and hardships she must overcome she discovers she is also a paladin.
Starless by Jacqueline Carey Non-binary
During a moon-on-moon eclipse two babies are born. One is a princess of the Sun-blessed, and the other her “shadow;” her god-chosen protector. Khai’s whole life is spent training for the moment where he will meet the princess and take on this role, but of course when that time comes he realises that shit’s just barely getting started.
A Taste of Honey by Kai Ashante Wilson Bi
Prose gorgeous enough to make you weep and a story that— Actually, best to go into this one blind. You won’t regret it.
The Montague Siblings by Mackenzi Lee Bi and asexual/aromantic
Don’t you hate it when your European holiday turns into a manhunt, and also your sister is along for the ride so you can’t even hit on your best friend in peace? Smh.
Simon Snow by Rainbow Rowell Maybe gay, maybe bi (protagonist still figuring shit out)
Who needs Harry Potter when you can have Carry On. All the no artificial colour or flavourings magical school deliciousness you love paired with an artisanal magic system and a truly decadent enemies-to-lovers romance.
7 votes
To be Taught, If Fortunate by Becky Chambers Pan
A space explorer and her crew sleep for decades between planets. Earth dramatically changes each time they wake, but they don’t let it get in the way of sending their findings home.
Captive Prince by CS Pacat Bi
Following a violent coup a Prince is disguised as a slave and delivered into the court of his enemies, and the only way save his homeland lies in aiding the worst of them. (A note from me, your friendly OP: A lot of things in the first book of this trilogy will seem very problematic on first read, so this is me promising you that the rest of the trilogy does address it all. Things are not what they seem!)
Silver in the Wood by Emily Tesh Gay
Grumpy woods hermit is repeatedly bothered by wide-eyed scholar.
Bel Dame Apocrypha by Kameron Hurley Bi
Nyx used to be part of an elite bounty-hunter sect, tasked with collecting the heads of boys foolish enough to desert a never-ending war. But now she’s been cast out and all that matters is making money with her motley mercenary crew, no matter how dangerous the job.
The Amberlough Dossier by Lara Elena Donnelly Gay
This is a book about the insidious encroach of fascism, and about two not exactly good men who are not elevated by the love they feel for one another but rather drag it down into their selfish, self-preserving, ruthless world. Also cabaret.
The Last Herald Mage by Mercedes Lackey Gay
Vanyal just really wants to be a bard, but his dad is all ‘like fuck you will, go learn to be a warier.’ Of course then then it turns out he’ll be neither because he is a super powerful mage. I believe there are also psychic horses involved.
Inda by Sherwood Smith Gay and bi
Young Inda is something of a prodigy when it comes to strategy and tactics, so it’s especially awkward when he’s expelled from military academy and turns to a life of piracy.
6 votes
The Band by Nicholas Eames Lesbian
Clay thought his mercenary days were well behind him, but then an old band-mate shows up needing help to rescue his daughter and it looks like there’s one more tour left in him after all. (Note: this blurb applies to book one of The Band, but it's book two,The Bloody Rose, with the lesbian protagonist).
The Winged Histories by Sofia Samatar Lesbian
Four woman, a rebellion, and some stunningly poetic prose.
5 votes
In The Vanishers' Palace by Aliette de Bodard Lesbian
Beauty and the beast but one hundred percent more dragon.
Nemisis by April Daniels Trans
Hiding the fact she’s trans gets a lot harder for Danny when the superhero Dreadnought dies right in front her. Now she’s got his powers, powers which magically transform her body to the shape she’s always known it should be. And now she’s also got a dad desperate to change her back, a best friend who wants to date her, and a whole cabal of superheroes who think she doesn’t belong.
Karen Memory by Elizabeth Bear Lesbian
Prostitutes in an alternate wild-west face of against a bad buy with a streampunk mind control machine.
Santa Olivia by Jacqueline Carey Lesbian
Loup Garron’s father was a genetically engineered soldier on the run from the government, and from him she inherited some cool skills like super strength, speed, and an inability to feel fear. Naturally she uses these skills to become a vigilante superhero and win boxing matches.
Nightrunner by Lynn Flewelling Bi
Painfully sweet young Alec is plucked from a dungeon by the mysterious and dashing elf, Seragol. He’s basically a spy for the queen and he’s all, ‘hey you’re cute wanna come be my spy apprentice?’ Adventures ensue.
China Mountain Zhang by Maureen F Mchugh Gay
It’s the twenty-second century and following an economic collapse and socialist revolution in America, China has become the dominate world-power. We are following Zhang through a decade of his life; sometimes focusing directly on him and sometimes not. Sometimes we are on mars, and sometimes we are not.
Catfishing on CatNet by Naomi Kritzer Lesbian
Living a life constantly on the run from her abusive father really sucks for Steph, but it sucks slightly less with her group of close internet friends on the cat-pic sharing social media site, CatNet. And when he father does finally find her it’s the CatNet, and the sentient AI behind it, who might be her only hope.
An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon Intersex
The HSS Matilda has been carrying tens of thousands of people across space for generations; from a ruined Earth to a supposed promised land. The populace of the ship are separated across highly-segregated racial lines, but when a link is found between the deaths of the ship’s Monarch and Aster’s own mother she won’t let them stand in the way of uncovering the truth.
The Founders trilogy by Robert Jackson Bennett Lesbian
The trouble with being an excellent thief is eventually someone’s gonna pay you to steal the kind of thing that people would kill for. In Sancia’s case it’s a powerful artifact that some bad guys want to use to re-write the world.
Dr. Greta Helsing by Vivian Shaw Gay
Greta Helsing, doctor to the undead, must stop of a group of murderous monks before they kill all of her clients.
4 votes
The Drowning Girl by Caitlín R. Kiernan Lesbian
A masterclass in what a skilled author can do with an unreliable narrator, The Drowning Call follows India Morgan Phelps (Imp to her friends) as she attempts to write a ghost story. Or, well. A “ghost story.”
The Winnowing Flame by Jen Williams Lesbian
There’s nothing more depressing than spending your days in a city in decline, watching your life slowly pass you by. So who can blame Tormalin the Oathless for instead taking up with an eccentric explorer and a fugitive witch, for leaving the city behind and heading off to fight monsters and unearth artifacts.
Elemental Logic by Laurie J Marks Lesbian (at least? I get the impression this is an everyone is queer kind of book. You love to see it).
The Earth Witch is dead and heirless, the elements are out of balance, and the land of Shaftal is slowly, painfully, dying. Its fate now lies in the hands of a scholar turned reluctant warrior; the sole survivor of a slaughtered tribe, and a drug-addicted half-blood giant.
The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley Gay
When Thaniel finds a gold pocket watch on his pillow he’s like, hey cool. Free watch. It’s not until it saves his life that he figures he should maybe find where it came from. A journey that leads him to Japanese immigrant Keita Mori, from Victorian London to civil war Japan, and even further beyond.
Seven Blades in Black by Sam Sykes Lesbian
Among humans, none have power like mages. And among mages, none have will like Sal the Cacophony. Once revered, now vagrant, she walks a wasteland scarred by generations of magical warfare.
Los Nefilim by T Frohock Gay
There’s a war between angels and demons being fought in 1930s Spain, but Diago Alvarez is staying out of it. He’s half-angel, half-demon, wholly not giving a fuck. But when Diago’s lover Miquel and his son are threatened Diago realises he does have some fucks to give after all.
Shades of Magic by VE Schwab Bisexual, Gay
Antari are magicians with the ability to travel between alternate Londonds, and Kell is one of the last of them. Officially he’s a diplomat for the royal family that adopted him; carrying letters to the different Londons on behalf of his royal parents. Less officially he’s a smuggler. Guess which of those is about to get him into a whole mess of trouble?
Tales from Verania by TJ Klune Gay
This book is ridiculous and fun and will make your face hurt from all the grinning and then when you least suspect it BAM it punches you in the heart. So sneaky. When Prince Justin becomes King, Sam will be his wizard. Even though Justin is a jerk and is dating Knight Commander Ryan, who is a dreamboat and anyone can see should be with Sam. When Justin gets kidnapped by a dragon, Sam and Ryan (and Gary the sassy unicorn) have to go save him.
Did you think I was kidding when I said pour one out for the TBRs?
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2020.07.27 13:18 adopt27JJul Birmingham G-ay Speed Da-ting

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2020.07.27 13:04 blind27JJul P-of Da-ting but Nothing Serious

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2020.07.15 18:04 daprice82 Wrestling Observer Rewind ★ Jul. 1, 2002

Going through old issues of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter and posting highlights in my own words. For anyone interested, I highly recommend signing up for the actual site at f4wonline and checking out the full archives.
PREVIOUSLY:
1-7-2002 1-14-2002 1-21-2002 1-28-2002
2-4-2002 2-11-2002 2-18-2002 2-25-2002
3-4-2002 3-11-2002 3-18-2002 3-25-2002
4-1-2002 4-8-2002 4-15-2002 4-22-2002
4-29-2002 5-6-2002 5-13-2002 5-20-2002
5-27-2002 6-3-2002 6-10-2002 6-17-2002
6-24-2002
  • Bret Hart was seriously injured in a bicycle accident in Calgary last week. As of press time, Dave has very little info. Hart was thrown off the bike and flipped over the handlebars going at a high speed and landed on his back and hit the back of his head. Over the next couple of days, he's undergone a number of tests due to issues he's had since the accident. Bret was forced to retire 2 years ago after he suffered a serious concussion during the Starrcade 99 match with Goldberg and it's believed the fall may have aggravated the issues he's had since then. Hart is expected to be hospitalized for at least a week and has little movement on the left side of his body and can't see out of his right eye. He's also suffering severe back pain, though x-rays and scans haven't shown any physical damage to his back. That's all Dave knows right now. (Much more on this next week, obviously).
  • After a year of questionable decision-making, Vince McMahon made his most questionable decision yet when he announced the surprise re-hiring of Vince Russo. It's a shocking decision for lots of obvious reasons, not the least of which is most of the wrestlers either outright don't like him or at the very least, don't respect him. And many front office employees feel even more strongly about him. Not even Stephanie McMahon, who is the head of creative, knew Russo was coming back and she was just as blindsided by the news as everyone else. It's believed the deal has been in the works for a few weeks. Russo had owned a CD store in Marietta, GA but he sold the store recently. He also stopped submitting ideas to the Jarretts for TNA a couple of weeks ago. There's also the fact that Russo's lawsuit against Hulk Hogan over the Bash at the Beach 2000 incident is still pending and now they're in the same company again, although Dave suspects the legal issues must be wrapped up for Russo to take the job (Turner was still paying his legal fees so long as he didn't work for any other wrestling company, which is why everyone was denying his involvement with TNA). Another rumor going around is that Russo is planning to write a tell-all book about his time in WWF and when word about that got out, the company rehired him in an effort to squash the book. Dave thinks that might be believable if Russo was just hired and stuck in a closet somewhere. But he was brought back in a key position in the creative department, which means that likely wasn't the reason (or not a big part of it). Most likely, it's exactly what it appears on the surface: Vince McMahon is getting desperate and he's going back to what worked in the past.
  • When word got out about Russo's hiring, needless to say, everyone was shocked and, as you'd expect, it was an overwhelmingly negative reaction. The plan for Russo on day one was for him to be in control of the creative team, answering only to Stephanie McMahon. The next day, those plans changed after McMahon, Russo, Stephanie, and the rest of the writing team had a big meeting. There's been multiple stories about what happened during the meeting. One version of the story is that Russo's ideas were so bad that he pretty much buried himself with everyone immediately. Another version is that Stephanie pretty much buried all his ideas and shut him down. And yet another version is that Russo obviously hadn't kept up with the product and was unfamiliar and out of touch with many of the characters and ongoing storylines, and that soured Vince McMahon on him. Regardless, the result was the same: the very next day, Russo was no longer part of the creative team. Word is he has already been sent home and will be brought back if/when they need ideas, as sort of a consultant on retainer. Officially, his role now is to critique the TV shows and report back to Vince McMahon what he thinks. So he's basically paid to be a critic and tell McMahon how he would do it better. Anyway, that's the story for now. Dave runs down Russo's history in the business, how he came into power in WWF, jumping ship to WCW with no notice, where he proceeded to help kill the company and all the drama that happened there (can't wait for that one Vince Russo superfan that always accuses me of lying about him to chime in on this one).
  • For the record, one of Russo's big ideas for TNA's debut was taking the Shane Twins and dressing them up as giant penises and calling them the Big Johnsons. Thankfully, when the show aired, the announcers downplayed the "penis" aspect of it a lot, leading Russo to tell friends that the idea flopped because the commentators didn't sell it hard enough. Just in case you're wondering what Vince Russo is bringing to the table in 2002.
  • WWE's King of the Ring is in the books. For the first time since Wrestlemania, it was a legit sellout on PPV. And sucks for them because this was a pretty blah show. Undertaker retained the WWE title over Triple H in a bad match that was hampered because Undertaker is banged up in general and Triple H came into the match with an elbow injury. 2 days after the show, he underwent elbow surgery to remove bone chips, one of which was embedded in cartilage and had caused his arm to lock up. He was nowhere near 100% during the match, but if he had been, Dave suspects they probably would have put the belt back on him. But for now, they stuck with Undertaker. They did a post match angle to set up Rock vs. Undertaker vs. Triple H at Vengeance, assuming Triple H is ready by then (he was not).
  • The biggest story of the PPV, in Dave's opinion anyway, is the Kurt Angle/Hulk Hogan match, in which Angle beat Hogan clean as a sheet by submission. Dave gives Hogan credit: he didn't treat this like Kidman. Hogan put Angle over as strong as he possibly could. Dave believes it's the first time in Hogan's entire career that he lost via submission as a babyface. He did have a few submission losses as a heel (once to Inoki in NJPW in 1981 and a handful in WCW during the NWO era) but that's it. If he had any as a babyface, it would have been before 1979, before he was a national name. Whether this ultimately springboards Angle into a certified top guy that fans take seriously remains to be seen, but Hogan did everything he could. Probably didn't help that, as soon as the match was over, Angle put his goofy wig back on, at a moment that should have been used to turn him into a serious threat. But regardless, nobody can fault Hogan here if it doesn't get over.
  • Other notes from the PPV: Jericho vs. RVD in the opening match was easily the best match on the show. Lesnar got loud "Goldberg" chants and Dave thinks he sold way too much for Test, especially since the rumor is Lesnar is being groomed for a Summerslam main event with Rock. Nidia in her hillbilly gimmick with Jamie Noble was great and Dave thinks they might have something with Nidia and this gimmick. Ric Flair vs. Eddie Guerrero was.....not what you'd think. Dave has seen Flair drag talentless hacks to great matches for 20 years but somehow, Flair vs. Guerrero was a drag and should have been better than it was considering the two men involved. Two all-time greats just had a misfire somehow. Molly won the women's title from Trish and Dave thinks this whole storyline where they claim Molly is fat is insulting to probably every single female viewer they have and a lot of the males too. A backstage segment with Rock, Goldust, and Booker T was the most entertaining thing on the show. Lesnar won the King of the Ring tournament by beating RVD in a nothing match. And of course, the main event, which was an overbooked mess with two guys who probably didn't have any business wrestling that night anyway.
WATCH: Goldust/Booker T/Rock backstage segment at WWE King of the Ring 2002
  • NWA-TNA's debut show is in the books! Actually, so is their second show because it was a double-taping. And buckle in because we have a metric fuck-ton of TNA news to cover. Overall, it was a well-received debut. A lot of the young wrestlers were hungry and some of the old guys worked like they had something to prove. Guys like Konnan and Buff Bagwell looked the best they have in years and many of the people who worked the show said this felt like the real deal (many of those same people had worked the recent WWA shows and saw those as paid vacations, nobody took it seriously). Scott Hall, said to be the highest paid wrestler in the company ($3,500 per week) didn't do anything special but he got by far the biggest reaction and, according to all accounts, was sober and professional. There were about 3,000 fans in the building, but only 400-500 were paid. More than 10,000 freebies were given away around Birmingham the week of the show, but the crowd they got was actually a good, active audience, so it worked. Mike Tenay on commentary was great and full of knowledge, though Ed Ferrara playing heel announcer was useless. Don West was enthusiastic as hell, but knew nothing about the product. Regardless, he knows how to work a camera and he took charge of the commentary booth and Dave thinks he did fine in the role and will only get better. Ricky Steamboat was there, giving an emotional interview and putting over the NWA title. Ken Shamrock won the gauntlet battle royal (basically the same thing as a Royal Rumble match) to win the title, beating Malice (former WCW wrestler The Wall) in the final match after they were the last 2 left in the battle royal. There's been talk of doing a Shamrock vs. Don Frye match to try to catch some of that crossover UFC/PRIDE audience, but Dave is doubtful it'll be a draw here like it is in Japan.
  • What else? Country music star Toby Keith did a series of angles with Jeff Jarrett and Keith was by far the biggest star to the live fans. Keith got involved in the battle royal and eliminated Jarrett. NASCAR drivers Hermie Sadler and Sterling Martin got involved in a racial angle with K-Krush (R-Truth) using a bunch of "your kind" and "my kind" talk and Dave thinks that was pretty pathetic. The company was hoping all this celebrity involvement would get them some mainstream publicity but it got practically none. They brought in a bunch of women, most of whom were total unknowns except for ECW's Francine, Electra, and former WCW valet Daffney under the name Shannon, and their battle royal on the second show was said to be awful. The whole event definitely had a southern/regional feel to it. The opening match of Jerry Lynn, AJ Styles, and Low-Ki vs. Jorge Estra, Sonny Siaki, and Jimmy Yang was the show-stealer and was better than most of the matches in WWE this year.
  • Now the bad news: TNA was under the impression they had Dish Network cleared to air their show, but no dice. They don't have Cablevision in the U.S. either. For a company that needs to draw 50,000 buys a week to break even without a corporate sponsor, that's extremely bad news. They're also losing their Canadian PPV after the response to the debut show was said to be lackluster. At press time, InDemand has allegedly told TNA that their debut show did 80,000 buys but preliminary numbers are always drastically higher than the final result, so it'll almost certainly be less than that (for example, InDemand's number for WWA's first PPV was originally 40,000 but later got revised to 15,000). In WWE, they don't take any PPV numbers seriously at first because the thought is any numbers you hear within the first 2 months of the show are always wrong, the final tallies take time to come in. Regardless, even if this show did well, the more important question is how will they be doing in 4-5 weeks when the new has worn off?
  • Despite TNA claiming they aren't even interested in TV and are 100% committed to running exclusively on PPV, that's obviously not true. They have already struck syndication deals in Nashville and Chattanooga and are actively working to get a national television deal. The problem is that, as you can tell by looking at WWE ratings over the last year, the business is in a sharp decline, meaning the TV industry isn't chomping at the bit to give TV deals to some new startup nobody company. But anyone who understands the industry knows they have no chance of surviving on weekly PPV alone so getting on TV sooner than later is going to be essential to TNA's survival. The local syndicated deals they struck will mostly be hype shows with interviews and highlights designed to drive viewers to buy the weekly PPVs. Dave lists, like, 10 different promotions that have folded over the years in part due to the costs of paying for television.
  • Tons of TNA news in this issue which brings us to the debut "Random TNA News & Notes" section! Here we go: Bert Prentice will be working with the company and will no longer be running his own weekly shows in Nashville. There will be a one-night tournament at the next show to crown NWA tag team champions. Fun fact, those belts are currently held by The Shane Twins, who now wrestle in TNA as The Johnsons, doing the aforementioned masked penis gimmick. They'll be in the tournament even though they were already the champs in their previous gimmick. But the titles are being vacated and they will crown new ones.
  • We ain't done with TNA news. The dark match of the show featured a 450 pound dude named Cheex who is basically ripping off Rikishi's gimmick of doing things with his big ol' ass. And in case the ass gimmick and the "Cheex" name wasn't clear enough, he's being managed by a woman named Brown Eye Girl. So....yeah. If this ain't Vince Russo, I'll eat my shoe. Anyway, during the dark match, because Cheex is so big, the ring broke. As the show was going on the air live, the ring crew was frantically struggling to fix the ring, which is why it felt like they were stalling so much for the first 15 minutes. Because they were. The ring breaking also caused them to not be able to do the second dark match they had planned. Both matches were being taped to air on next week's show.
  • Actual notes from TNA's debut show (I'm gonna divide this into multiple paragraphs because there's a lot): it opened with some pyro, which is meant to make them look major league, but everyone else always looks minor league compared to WWE's huge pyro show every week and this was no exception. No graphics or details on any of the wrestlers, which is a mistake considering so many of them are complete unknowns to most fans. Started with a bunch of legends coming out to put over the NWA title, including Ricky Steamboat cutting one of the best promos of the year in any promotion and Dave thinks they need to hire Steamboat and put him in an on-air role as a commissioner or something ASAP. Jeff Jarrett cut a promo saying it was stupid to crown a new champion in a battle royal. Way to bury your own main event 10 minutes into your debut show, especially since most people also agree that it's a pretty dumb way to do it. But they still did. Then Ken Shamrock and Scott Hall came out and they both cut promos and they also shat on the battle royal idea, leading Dave to worry already that this company hasn't learned anything from WCW's mistakes. As mentioned earlier, the opening match easily stole the show. Next up was a little person match, with the jobber actually being referred to as "an enhancement midget." The Shane Twins did the penis gimmick, but as mentioned, it was severely played down from the original idea as conceived by Russo.
  • More notes from the show: They brought out a bunch of women for a big segment and Dave, who spends his entire life watching wrestling, didn't know half of them. And even if he did, it wouldn't matter because there were no graphics to name any of them and even if there had been, the cameras were often showing the wrong woman when a name was announced. Anyway, among them were Francince from ECW (who Dave is worried about because she looked sickly thin), Shannon (formerly Daffney in WCW), Alexis Laree (better known years later as Mickie James), Elektra from ECW, Taylor Vaugn (formerly Barbara Bush in WWF), Erin (who was a finalist on Tough Enough season 1 but got booted from the show before production started because other contestants saw her out on a date with one of the judges and they complained and got her kicked off), and some others. At least one of the no-name chicks was a stripper they hired specifically for this show because they needed one more woman to make 10. Anyway, this all led to the expected brawl with Elektra getting her shirt ripped off to show her bra. It wasn't even that risque. If you're trying to use sex appeal to draw viewers, the worst thing you can do is be less risque than WWE is on free TV when you have the luxury of PPV (give em a few months and we'll get actual nudity on this show). Alicia Webb, formerly known in WWF as Ryan Shamrock (and who is dating Ken Shamrock in real life) was playing a prostitute collecting money from referee Mark Johnson.
  • Even more notes from the show: the NASCAR guys got a bigger pop than any of the wrestlers. K-Krush came out to confront them about not being real athletes and they did the racial angle. Brian Christopher got involved and funny story there, they were debating whether to use the last name Christopher, or his real last name of Lawler. Nobody told the announcers which it was gonna be so Mike Tenay kept using "Christopher" while Ed Ferrara kept using "Lawler." More WCW-level shit. Toby Keith performed. The gauntlet battle royal to crown the new champion featured Buff Bagwell, Prince Justice (later becomes Abyss), Konnan, Rick Steiner, Scott Hall, Jeff Jarrett, etc. Toby Keith ran in and suplexed Jarrett, causing him to get eliminated because why not? Chris Harris, Vampire Warrior, Steve Corino, and more. And when it got down to the last two, it became a regular match and Shamrock beat Malice to win the title with Steamboat as the special referee.
WATCH: NWA-TNA' s debut PPV (Full Show)
  • So that's the notes from the debut show. Are we done with TNA yet? Not by a long shot. They taped a whole second show, remember?! It hasn't aired yet so Dave hasn't seen it so here's the scarce details. The crowd started filing out after the first show ended and kept leaving as the second one was going, to the point that Jeremy Borash and Bert Prentice had to get on the mic and beg everyone to stay and then moved a bunch of people to the hard camera side so there wouldn't be visible empty seats all over the place. Lenny Lane and former WCW star Kwee-Wee were put together as a gay tag team called Rainbow Express, managed by Joel Gertner, and kissed each other instead of tagging each other to swap in and out during the match, which got a lot of heat because Alabama. A 9-woman battle royal (guess they didn't let the hired stripper actually work) to crown Miss TNA resulted in a bunch of women getting stripped half naked. They did a 4-way elimination match to crown the X-Division champion which was won by AJ Syles in what was said to be easily the best match of either show, with even Harley Race going on record later to say it was one of the best matches he'd ever seen. But by then, there were very few fans left in the building. And that is finally it for TNA news for now. Whew.
  • PRIDE's latest show is in the books and once again featured pro wrestlers drawing the crowd. NOAH's Yoshihiro Takayama replaced Mark Coleman in the main event (out due to injury) against Don Frye, leading to last minute interest from wrestling fans that packed the house. Frye defeated Takayama in what many are calling the best fight in the history of PRIDE. Takayama has had 3 fights in PRIDE and has lost all 3 of them, but all 3 of them were also show-stealing outright wars that, despite losing, has grown Takayama into an even bigger star. Afterward, Frye hinted at retiring from MMA and returning to NJPW full time. Dave hasn't seen this fight but it was described to him as "something out of Dragonball Z or a comic book" the way they were just throwing bombs at each other, with the crowd going insane (yeah the opening minute or so if this fight is absolute madness, video below). The show also featured Bob Sapp vs. Kiyoshi Tamura, which was a total mismatch. Tamura is a skilled MMA fighter, but Sapp outweighed him by literally almost 200 pounds and the fight was over in 11 seconds, with Sapp basically murdering him. Dave says it's clear they're trying to turn Sapp into a huge unbeatable monster psychopath and it's working. But Dave thinks it's bullshit to put fighters this mismatched against each other in real shoots. It was funny though because after what happened in Sapp's K-1 fight a few weeks ago, they made some new rules like no knees and no kicking a downed opponent, which is fine. But they also announced other rules for the fight, such as no flying sentons or splashes off the top ropes, which have never been done in an MMA fight and is utterly ridiculous (If Cormier doesn't hit Miocic with a Canadian destroyer at UFC 252 next month, what's even the point?). Another NOAH star, Takashi Suguira, lost a split decision with Daniel Gracie and Suguira had several NOAH wrestlers at ringside cheering him on. And of course, Antonio Inoki came out at intermission and did his catchphrase.
WATCH: Yoshihiro Takayama vs. Don Frye - PRIDE
  • UFC made its TV debut with a half-hour segment on Fox Sports Net's "Best Damn Sports Show Period" which featured a full Robbie Lawler vs. Steve Berger bout, as well as highlights of other fights. "Fear Factor" host Joe Rogan did commentary with Mike Goldberg and Jeff Osbourne. They aired several warnings during the show, but the violence ended up being far less brutal than most average boxing matches. The show drew a strong crowd and there's talk that this may become a regular thing on the network. They also hyped the planned Tito Ortiz vs. Ken Shamrock fight for later this year and Dave thinks TNA would be wise to get the NWA title off Shamrock before the fight, because he's going into it as the underdog. Plus, Shamrock would likely not want to risk injury or spend time flying to Nashville every week during the last few weeks of training. Wouldn't be a good look for TNA if Shamrock goes to the octagon with the NWA title belt and gets demolished by Ortiz. Also on the show, Chuck Liddell defeated Vitor Belfort in a war that catapulted Liddell into title contention and he'll likely face the winner of Shamrock/Ortiz sometime down the road.
  • Dave got his hands on a copy of Shaun Assael's new book "Sex, Lies, and Headlocks: The Real Story of Vince McMahon and the World Wrestling Federation" even though it hasn't been released yet. Review time! The original concept for the book was to chronicle the Monday Night Wars, but just as the book was being finished, the whole business changed and since Vince became the lone survivor, the book was changed to focus on him and the WWF primarily. The book is fair and accurate for the most part. Assael didn't run from any of the controversial stories, but he also didn't sensationalize things to make them seem bigger than they were. If you're a long-time Observer reader, you already know all this stuff and could probably point out details or inconsistencies in the story, but to the average fan who hasn't been following all the behind-the-scenes stuff for the last 20 years, it's sure to be an eye-opener. Anyway, Dave recaps the book in detail, mostly just correcting things that the author got wrong but also acknowledging that this is an early review copy and some of these mistakes will be corrected before it's published and released. Otherwise, he just pokes holes in various myths and stories that are covered. The Observer was credited in the book for being one of the author's sources, specifically in regards to Dave's coverage of the steroid trial (yeah, if you haven't read it, go back and check those out. Dave actually attended the trial and his recap of it is one of the most must-read issues of the Observer in its entire history). The book pretty much ends at the death of WCW, though it does note that business has declined significantly since then. Overall, Dave says it's by far the best book on the real modern history of professional wrestling that he's ever read and is a must-read for any wrestling fan. But it's also too short (288 pages) to really get into all the detail needed to tell so many of these stories. But for what it is, best book of its type that Dave's ever read.
AMAZON LINK: "Sex, Lies, and Headlocks: The Real Story of Vince McMahon and the World Wrestling Federation" by Shaun Assael
  • In AAA in Mexico, there's a new guy named Canibal who's gimmick is pulling his opponent's trunks down and biting them on the ass. It's too late. You already read the sentence. You can't un-know that now.
  • AJPW stars Kaz Hayashi and Kendo Kashin were supposed to be working some shows for AAA at the moment. Fun story, when they arrived in Mexico, nobody from AAA was there to meet them at the airport and nobody they called from the AAA office would answer the phone, so they basically found themselves stranded in Mexico with no idea what to do and unable to speak the language. Dave says the exact same thing happened to Great Sasuke several years ago when he went to Mexico. Anyway, last Dave heard, Hayashi and Kashin were trying to get themselves booked on some indie shows in Mexico so they can get some pictures of them working there to take back to the magazines in Japan (which was the whole reason for their trip) so they're just looking to work one or two shows and then go back home. They can't work for CMLL because that promotion has a business relationship with NJPW.
  • Last month, AAA held its 10th annual Triplemania show in Los Angeles. Here's the problem though: it was an utter flop, with embarrassing attendance and almost nobody even realizing it happened. So AAA has decided to just pretend it didn't happen and has now scheduled Triplemania X again, this time in Mexico (maybe WWE should do that next year. Since Wrestlemania was pretty much just in an empty warehouse this year, they shouldn't even acknowledge it. Just redo Wrestlemania 36 again next year and pretend it's the first time).
  • Remember the story a couple months ago about how Invader 1 (the guy who murdered Bruiser Brody) left the WWC promotion? Well, he was scheduled to return this week as a special referee for a Carlos Colon match but it ended up not happening. He said he wanted his return to be a surprise, but the story was already out on the internet that he was coming back. For what it's worth, almost none of the wrestling fans in Puerto Rico have internet (I did the research, only 17.5% of the country had internet access in 2002 and you gotta figure only a fraction of those are wrestling fans, so Dave is likely correct here) so it still would have been a surprise to probably 99% of them. But either way, Invader 1 pulled out of the show over it and still isn't back with the promotion.
  • Spanky (Brian Kendrick) won a tournament at an indie show in California to get a shot for the Zero-1/UPW unified title. That's not the important part. How it happened is the original guy who was scheduled to win ended up pulling out of the show at the last minute because his pregnant wife was overdue so he stayed behind to be with her. So they made a call to Spanky, who was in Cincinnati. He immediately packed up his car and was on the road 30 minutes after receiving the call. And didn't stop. He drove 30 hours straight, some 2,200 miles, and made it to the venue literally an hour or so before showtime and did the match. That's freakin' dedication (I think he's talked about this in a shoot interview before. Said he masturbated to stay awake and started vomiting uncontrollably halfway through the drive or something, but still made it. Madness.)
  • AJPW news: there are no truth to the rumors of a WWE/AJPW relationship, which was mentioned last week. Motoko Baba and Tenryu were at WWE's show in Hawaii to take photos for the Japanese magazines to make people think something is up, but there's nothing there. They were just visiting because Johnny Ace got them backstage. Also, the newspapers in Japan have begun reporting that Keiji Muto will take over as AJPW president when Ms. Baba retires, which confirms what Dave has been saying for months.
  • Kenta Kobashi's first match back for NOAH will be this week at Korakuen Hall. He'll be working undercard tag matches so he won't be doing too much. If you recall, he was out for over a year with knee injuries, had one match in February in which he re-injured himself again and has been out ever since.
  • Speaking of Korakuen Hall, NJPW's latest show there only drew 1,200 fans, which means the building was only half full. Just in case you're wondering how NJPW is doing in 2002. Not great.
  • Don Frye did an interview claiming Antonio Inoki is working to put together a match between himself and Mike Tyson. "Nobody is taking that seriously," Dave says.
  • Speaking of Japanese companies trying to latch on to the WWE train and speaking of lyin' ass Inoki: there have been rumors that Inoki is putting together a relationship with WWE. Not true. Inoki claimed recently that he had met with Vince McMahon about using some of WWE's undercard guys in NJPW and of starting his own promotion in the U.S. Dave says the meeting with Vince never happened and, in fact, the two men haven't gotten along or really even spoken at all in nearly 20 years.
  • More on Jesse Ventura's decision not to run for re-election as Minnesota governor. Part of the reason may be that the polls are showing he would likely lose the race. Of course, that's what the polls said last time and he shocked the world. But after 4 years in office, his popularity isn't near what it was back then, when he was the exciting outsider. Now the voters have seen what he brings to the table and they don't seem to like it too much. Ventura was already planning to make the announcement, but then the story about his son hosting parties at the governor's mansion broke, and Ventura made the announcement 2 days earlier than he'd planned. Using the criticism that his son has gotten in the media as his excuse for not running provided Ventura a good "out" but he was already planning not to run long before that story happened and the press conference had been scheduled nearly 2 weeks earlier, so take it with a grain of salt. Most likely, he saw the writing on the wall and knew he was going to lose if he ran again.
  • Notes from the latest Ring of Honor event: it was said to be an incredible show, with guys like Bryan Danielson, Low-Ki, Christopher Daniels, Spanky, Jerry Lynn, AJ Styles, and more all having amazing matches. There was a moment during the show where Scoot Andrews went to hit Christopher Daniels' valet, Lucious. But then he stopped himself and said he'd never hit a woman, but he knew somebody who would. This was a tease to bring out another female wrestler, but the crowd started chanting for Steve Austin. The show drew 450 fans and sold out the building, which is the largest crowd ROH has drawn so far.
  • Famous St. Louis Cardinal announcer Jack Buck passed away a couple weeks ago and Dave notes that Buck actually had some involvement in wrestling back in the day. He used to do radio broadcasting of Sam Muchnick's shows live for KMOX radio in the 1960s and there's even a picture somewhere out there of Giant Baba picking Buck up and holding him like a baby. (I actually just watched the 30 For 30 documentary on the McGwire/Sosa home run race and they talked about Jack Buck in there. Good times. Anyway, someone find that picture because I'm having no luck).
  • Sting is scheduled to make an appearance, but not wrestle, at an indie show Harley Race is putting together this week in St. Louis. This will be Sting's first wrestling-related appearance since WCW folded.
  • In case you're wondering what XPW and Rob Black are up to these days, allow Dave to fill you in. Black is currently doing an angle where he's pretending he had a stroke and he pisses and shits on himself all over TV. They also did a segment where wrestler GQ Money (now a producer for NXT) broke into Black's home and tried to rape his wife until somebody made the save. The next week, they showed Money supposedly raping a girl in the parking lot and leaving her for dead, and the week after, he got sprayed with raw sewage. Now they're building up to a raw sewage match, based on this rape storyline. XPW, folks.
  • Dave has some more notes on Cody Runnels, the son of Dusty Rhodes who was backstage at WWE's show in Atlanta last week. Cody is a sophomore in high school and placed 6th in the state in amateur wrestling the past year. He also plays football. He was described to Dave as having a similar physical look as Randy Orton, "but with a face like Dusty."
  • WWA's scheduled tour of Europe has been officially canceled. The German and Switzerland shows had abysmal ticket sales and pretty much had to be canceled. The show in Ireland had more than 4,000 tickets sold and would have been a success, but even so, that one show alone wasn't going to make enough money to offset the cost of the whole tour.
  • This is actually hilarious. UFC fighter Vitor Belfort and his training partner were in a taxi before the UFC show when a bunch of cops showed up and surrounded the car. Why, you ask? Well the cab driver overheard Belfort and his partner talking about "shooting at the legs" and she got scared, not knowing what they were talking about, and called the police. Seems like they got it all straightened out though.
  • Rock will be working nearly full-time on TV from now until Summerslam, at which point he's leaving for a few months to go film his next movie. He won't be on every Smackdown, but he'll be on most of them.
  • Nothing new on the Goldberg/WWE negotiations. Vince McMahon told Goldberg's agents that he will clear his schedule any time Goldberg wants to have a meeting, but Goldberg doesn't seem particularly interested. The fact that WWE rehired Russo probably won't help matters because Goldberg is one of the many who doesn't like Russo.
  • Shawn Michaels is booked to be in Kevin Nash's corner on upcoming house shows once Nash is cleared to wrestle again. There's still no plans for Shawn to wrestle, but given how depleted the WWE roster is right now, Dave is sure they'll probably start pushing him to sooner than later (Nash ends up getting injured again almost immediately, so I don't think Shawn ever did these house show appearances).

Looks like this is one of those issues where I went over the 40,000 character limit. Hit the comments below for the rest.

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2020.07.13 00:56 SilentRunning The "WHERE ARE THEY NOW" files. ~ A COMMUNITY writing challenge/activity for the serious fan.

Hey everyone, in case you don't know me I am the one who created the Community Screen Writing contest. And NOW I'm back for more classroom fun, YEH!
(Read this in Dean Pelton's voice...it will be worth it)
Here's the deal. This is not a competition there will be NO judging and NO prizes...oh well. The purpose is to get you to be CREATIVE. So put on those thinking caps and anything that matches cause here we go...
You will write one or two...or three paragraphs about your favorite MAIN character. It will be a short to the point summary about what happened to them AFTER season 6. As if Season 7 happened but we weren't invited to the show. I hear Dan's been stuck in his garage AKA Carpentry room this whole Pandemic Lock Down and doesn't want to come out.
AND...if you want to include a Secondary character (Alex), please do. That would be nice, and I'm sure the real actors would appreciate being included in this.
SO...Every body should submit their work in individual threads. So we don't get confused. Comment, critique (Nicely, or else) and just have a good time. Maybe Dan will secretly stop by and STEAL some ideas...MAYBE NOT. But who cares.
So here is MY Submission: (must be read in Elroy Patashnik's voice...trust me)
Season 7 til now...
Annie Edison – Left to start her FBI internship at Quantico, VA. As usual she did exceptionally well and was accepted into the very next class of agents. Went on to a strong, fulfilling career as a good FBI criminologist. Married a young businessman who's online fur-coat restoration business failed. Later divorced due to emotional/financial strife She finds herself back in Greendale on an extended vacation from her previous life.
Abed Nadir – Left to start an entry level P.A. job in Los Angeles in which he quickly abandoned after a summer and moved back to Greendale six months later. Forced to move back in with his father, he soon began working as a part time online commercial director for a small start up called “quick 60” and working his off days in his fathers falafel restaurant. Due to his inability to understand others creative flow he slowly gave up on his dream of being a “working” filmmaker and devoted his free time to his blossoming channel on Youtube. He has found satisfaction with helping his father run the restaurant's back-end. His father quickly saw how creative he was and promoted him to head of management in charge of promotion. Here he changed the entire environment of the restaurant into a TV/Movie theme paradise and calls it Memetown Falafel Paradise (MFP). The restaurant is divided into a TV and a Movie Section. Wait staff assigned to a certain section pose as random popular characters and must stay in character during the work day. Back of the house staff are given characters from popular Restaurant/food themed shows. This formula has proven quite popular in Greendale and has spawned 3 more locations in neighboring Denver, Colorado Springs and Salt Lake City. Abed recently proposed to his long time girlfriend Rachel, she said yes.
Britta Perry – Stayed in Greendale and continued working as a bartender, she moved into Jeff's apartment after Abed and Annie moved out and Jeff realized she was living in her car, again. WHILE working her way through her MASTERS degree in Psychology she and “Frankie” had a brief torrid affair and moved in together. Months later they had an amicable split and Britta moved back into her car for a short period. A year later while staffing a local speed dating event she reconnected with Jeff. The two moved in together AGAIN and slowly began to realize they are right for each other. They became an official couple a couple weeks prior to the “Reunion”. After years of school, internships and volunteer work, she finally started working at Greendale's leading Non-Profit Children's Mental Health clinic. Recently she just passed all her required licensing test and awaits full certification from the state. Scary, I know.
Ben Chang – Stayed in Greendale and was committed into full time residency at Colorado's leading Mental Health state institution. Where he under went intense Cognitive Behavioral therapy, electric shock therapy and Hypnotic therapy. After many years of intensive work he was released under his own cognizance. He soon found work near the Greendale Community Campus as an online test taker helping students pass their online required courses. He has recently applied to the North American Espanol' Teachers Association (NAETA) to be certified as an online Virtual Spanish teacher and hopes to begin teaching again soon. He is apparently dating a HOT senorita with big connections to this association's certification process- go figure.
Craig “DEAN” Pelton – Still the DEAN of Greendale Community College, thanks mostly to the non-stop effort of Frankie. The Dean reconnected with a lost love named, you guessed it - Dean Steven Spreck. The two met at a Colorado mixer for Gay Power United, a social mixer club for the LGBT professional set. A brief, intense affair followed but was ended by Dean Pelton. The two spent many years passive-aggressively pursuing each other in private and in public. Their small social circle began to call this negative relationship “Deaning”. Finally the two recently started intense couple therapy and taking positive steps to create a loving balanced relationship. It seems during the couple therapy the reasons for Dean Sprecks attempts to take down Greendale College sprout from the couple's previous hidden relationship when attending University. The two were constant HOOK-UPs during their freshman years, although Spreck still refers to it as their blooming relationship period. Craig still has trouble seeing it as such. Anyways, the two are hoping to marry soon and start a bi-racial LGBT family. Good for them.
Jeff Winger – Has finally JUST left Greendale and works in his new career as a bartender-owner of his very own bar and grill called the “Hung Jury”. No longer a practicing lawyer he still dispenses “Good times” and free legal advice, after the second drink, to all legal aged adults in need. He lives with his new wife to be Britta Perry, have a very expensive french bulldog puppy named Pierre, take European vacations to help the needy and spend x-mas together at Britta's parents.
Pierce Hawthorne – The real reason for the “Reunion” is revealed that Pierce is not dead. Because of all his past legal, personal and kin groug (ie: Family) issues he found a legal loophole and became a NATIVE Indigenous Canadian, following a small donation to a tribe near Vancover. During this time away Pierce finds that he has a talent for picking Wall St. winners while using the tribes social funds. The tribe elders upon finding out of Pierce's talent split the proceeds 50/50 and release Pierce from his newly acquired Native legacy. He stays in Vancouver at a local Hostel, keeping his life to the bare minimum and continuing his streak of picking winners. Soon he attains his first small fortune and quickly disappears again. Rumor has it he has bought some land just outside of Greendale and has buried a number of container houses underground.
Troy Barnes – It was reported shortly after Troy and Levar Burton were released from a years stay in Pirate prison they landed on the tiny island nation of New Zealand. There they spent a few months enjoying their time and working up enough money to repair the ship to get back to finishing their round-the-world cruise. On a shake down voyage, Troy and Skipper Levar, accompanied by new friends: A Billionaire and his wife, a Professor, A local TV star and a very beautiful Maori girl named Mari-Anne, were all reported LOST at sea after a huge storm unexpectedly swept through the region. Reports of strange wandering radio signals emanating from afar have mentioned Greendale and stories of Paint Ball wars, none have been substantiated as of yet.
Shirley Bennett – Still in Atlanta during the last episode, she found out about her sandwich shop being abandoned and forgotten. She quickly filed for bankruptcy protection, sold off anything of value and laid down roots for good in Atlanta. Here she remarried, regained custody of her boys (edit) and started a new sandwich business called Southern Shirley's Subs (Say that three time fast-I dare ya). This small shop started in the corner of Tyler Perry's studio grounds soon grows into a large SOUTHERN based franchised corporation. She is married to Doctor Pedro De Paccas, an internationally renowned Ear, Nose and Throat specialist.
Frankie Dart – The new Dean of Organizational studies in the New sub campus located off the reserve parking log of Greendale Community College. Frankie is still a Lesbian and has no plans to change it. She served as one of Britta Perry's maids at her wedding and managed to hook up with a couple of fellow maids that evening. Later she did finally settle down with a new partner, So Yung Hee. A Korean/Chinese professional badminton player whom she met on vacation one day on the island nation of New Zealand. The two have recently bought a new house just on the outskirts of Greendale and enjoy living life with 3 dogs and 5 cats.
Elroy Patashnik – Still at Linkedin but has been working Voice Over narration for Independent Hollywood documentaries. It's a living.
submitted by SilentRunning to community [link] [comments]


2020.07.09 07:45 Justwonderinif Golden State Killer Timeline V

<<< Golden State Killer Timeline IV
2006
2007
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2011
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2013
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2020
Tuesday, August 18, 2020
Wednesday, August 19
Golden State Killer Timeline VI>>>
submitted by Justwonderinif to Timelines [link] [comments]


2020.03.22 21:45 MarcoIncognito How Pop Culture would change if the Reroll version of the Films were released.


So After reading an AlternateHistory.com thread taking about how pop culture would change if one little thing would happen. I chose to try and discover what would have happened if the reroll versions were released in place of the film Rerolled. I'm not a historian so these are just wild guesses after some research on Wikipedia.
A Few Rules that gradually popped up.
-Some films are based on books and follow the original book very closely while others do not(Blade Runner, and Aladdin come to mind). As such if the plot of the film is already very close to the book, then the book also changes.
-While it doesn't come up as often. If a Reroll of a film has a sequel that didn't exist in our timeline, then a director and some actors may have to turn down roles they had in our timeline to appear in the sequel.
The Wizard of Oz-1939
The original Wizard of Oz book from 1900 changes. Baum was known as a children’s book writer by this point, however Wizard of Oz was to be his magnum opus. He wanted to demonstrate he could write serious fantasy. His illustrator, Denslow had a strong interest in politics and agreed to draw darker images than normal as the book Baum wanted to write involved war and death. The book was published by the George M.Hill company, His refused at first until the Chicago grand Opera House committed to writing a play adapting the book, at first intended it to be a musical(as in our timeline) but then changed to an Opera due to the book’s darker subject matter. Julian Mitchell was approached to be director and agreed because the play had a lot of spectacle(in real life he had issues with the script’s lack of spectacle but seeing as this version has a Dragon and Oz at war it doesn’t have that problem to him).
Changes to the play were made like reducing the cowardly lion’s role and replacing Toto with a cow(which had the added affect of being less tragic when Glinda killed him).
The book was a hit but not as a children’s book but as a fantasy series, predating and thus being more influential than J.R.R. Tolkien’s works(who would be inspired by it). The play based on it was also a hit. People wanted more from Baum and he delivered, writing 13 Oz books in total that told a great epic though he wrote them to still have beginning, middle and ends. It received very little critical analysis in its first 50 years of existence(as critics believed Fantasy and long series had little literary merit, a double edged sword for the series).
The Opera changed a lot of the original book, such as making the main character aid the Wizard in usurping the rightful King of OZ, Pastoria II. The Wicked Witch was eliminated entirely, deemed superfluous. Baum then began working on both writing his books with the idea that they could be made into Operas. The second book “Return to Oz”(the title “Marvelous Land of Oz” wouldn’t fit the tone the OZ books have in this universe). This was adapted into the stage play “The Woggle Bug”. Which appeared while the original Wizard of Oz Opera was still being performed. Characters like the Scarecrow and the Tin Man were cut and the end result made it a mediocre success(in our timeline, it was a flop for being considered too kids stuff which isn’t the case here, and some other complaints work for it rather than against it in this timeline, for instance a scene where it rains cats and dogs was criticized as looking like it was raining corpses, which is a complaint in a children’s play but not in an opera about war).
Baum also worked for years on a stage adaptation of Ozma of Oz that did fairly well in Los Angeles, but not well enough to convince the producer to mount a production in New York. He also began a stage version of The Patchwork Girl of Oz, which would become an early film. He would try to make a return to children’s book with Dot and Tot of Merryland in 1901 but this book was a failure, faltering the relationship with Denslow, and was their last collaboration. Baum the children’s book writer is said to have died with that book, he would now be known for his epic fantasy. Baum would many times declare himself done with the Oz Books but kept coming back due to popular demand. Baum’s next book, The life and adventures of Santa Claus, was a realistic depiction of how Santa Claus might have lived had he really existed with some fantasy. This version of Santa even appeared in the Oz Books. Another book, Queen Zixi of Ix was also popular. Baum’s reputation allowed him to publish “The last Egyptian.” under his real name(not a pseudonym as in real life).
In 1914, Baum started his own film company, the Oz film Manufacturing company. The silent film actor Richard Rosson was involved, his younger brother Harold Rosson was the cinematographer on the 1939 Wizard of Oz film. Baum died in 1919.
The 1939 Wizard of Oz film was not made by MGM(Our timeline’s Wizard of Oz film was made because it was a children’s story and Disney’s Snow White was a recent success, proving they were profitable). It was instead made by the Oz Film manufacturing company(which never folded since the Oz books being marketed to children effectively killed it in our timeline, here it survives because the Oz series isn't a children's book series). Harold Rosson was involved thanks to his family connections. This also allowed the film to be more faithful. Ray Bolger would play the Scarecrow(as he wanted to ever since his childhood idol Fred Stone had on stage in 1902 which still happens so that doesn't change). Gale Sondergaard was originally cast to play the Wicked Witch, but didn’t like playing a hag character and was switched to playing Glinda instead, who began transforming into a hag in one scene, but a short one.
Actor Bobby Ebsen had turned down an exclusive MGM contract and was told he would never work in Hollywood ever again, despite this he was offered the role of the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz. The rest of the actors were left over from stage and previous film productions made by the Oz Film company.(in our timeline, Bobby Ebsen suffered poisoning from the aluminum paint used in his costume as the Tin Man in the MGM production. Here that doesn’t happen because The OZ Film Company has been making Oz films for years, as per Baum's intentions and wouldn’t make a mistake like that).
The film was revolutionary as Fantasy Films on its scale were rare at the time and there was simply nothing like it. It was also cheaper to make as most of the props were left over from earlier shows and films. While not a musical, the film’s one song “Somewhere over the rainbow” was a hit.
The cheaper production using old props specific to the story, meant they could get to work making sequels. An adaptation of Return to Oz followed in 1941, but the advent of World War II caused the studio to halt production in favor of making Wartime films. The Oz books were a series about a war and so the third film was reworked to create parallels between the events in Europe, the Gnome King became a stand in for Hitler and his conquest of Oz for the invasion of Europe. Dorothy returning to Oz to help save it was a stand in for America joining the War effort. The Oz Films continued until they faced a problem after the war.
The Oz Books(and the films adapted from them) had elements of Communism and while hidden in the first few works, as they went on these became more noticed. They were praised for other elements such as their feminism(almost all the major rulers of Oz were female), and their representation of gay individuals(Dorothy Gale would have a relationship with the witch Ozma in the books), one of the drawbacks to this was the term “Friend of Dorothy” was used among homosexuals in secret for a time(based on a line from one of the books where someone tells Dorothy she has queer friends and she responds with “I don’t mind if they’re queer so long as they're friends”. The production of Oz Films meant the FBI caught on to the term and soon the term was discontinued. Now the Oz books were under attack and both their communist elements and gay representation fell under attack as well. All works would be banned by the 1950’s, including the Motion Picture Production Code preventing Oz films from being made. This would only end with the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991. In the intervening time, literary attention shifted to J.R.R. Tolkien’s books, the Hobbit and the Lord of the rings series, which had come out around the late 1930’s and were deemed “Safer”. Attempts to rush them into film production came soon after as the Wizard of Oz films proved it could be done.
Notes:
The Cowardly Lion is supposedly based off the real life figure of William Jennings Bryan, ironically his character is preserved as in the book, the Lion is a fearsome beast and even acts brave but is ashamed at being secretly afraid, so the reroll didn’t change that seeing as how he is afraid but still acts brave by killing and attacking witches.
Baum’s plans for an Oz themed Amusement park never even came into existence in this timeline. Similarly the Fairylogue and Radio Plots which bankrupted Baum in real life never happened as the format doesn’t fit this version.
Neither Judy Garland, nor the other two proposed actresses: Shirley Temple and Deanna Durbin would be chosen since the film isn’t a musical and the story is not appropriate for children.
Margaret Hamilton doesn’t play the Wicked Witch because she was under MGM contract at the time. Who aren’t making the film in this timeline.
The Wiz, The animated sequels Journey Back to Oz, Tom and Jerry and the Wizard of Oz, Legends of Oz: Dorothy’s return don’t exist as a result of this Wizard of Oz not being kid friendly. Oz, the great and Powerful also doesn’t exist because the Wizard is a straight villain now(in the books he was rewritten as a good guy because children liked him but this version of Baum doesn't really care what children think since the series isn't for them). Margaret Hamilton's lost cameo on Sesame Street also doesn't exist as it directly revolves around her playing a Wicked Witch like character.
Things that continue to exist include Disney’s Return to Oz which is a bigger hit because its darker tone is closer to the book, and Wicked, though with a different plot that makes Glinda a villain, and the idea of the Wicked Witch being good is more justified given her more defensive actions in the original Wizard of Oz. The 2011 musical by Andrew Lloyd Webber still exists but is mostly original songs made by Webber himself.
The Urban legend about the hanging Munchkin still exists since that scene is still shot, but the idea of playing Pink Floyd synced up with the film does not.
Winnie the Pooh-1968
Nothing really changes on this one. Though there is an urban legend of a darker version of the film having been made beforehand. Shockingly this version was eventually leaked though probably only exists in storyboards(like the footage showing an evil Woody in an early draft of Toy Story).
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid-1969
Since the film is based on a true story, the film changes history as well. Butch Cassidy accepted a pardon for amnesty in 1899(which in real life he broke by attempting to rob a train again, here he doesn’t), as a result he got to live a longer life. Presumably becoming a businessman given his stocks.
When it comes to making the film, here it is an easy sell because in real life, the script was rejected because the leads ran away instead of fighting(many studio heads argued, since they don’t hear, the film is made faster. Warren Beatty is chosen to play the Sundance kid(in real life, he refused because it ended like Bonnie and Clyde). Newman and Beatty read the script together and agreed to do it.
Since the role of the Sundance Kid is not played by Robert Redford, we can assume the Sundance film festival does not exist. The Tv show Alias Smith and Jones based on the film, does exist however.
Jaws-1975
The Reroll also changes the plot of the book it’s based on. One of the bigger complaints where the human characters were unlikable(and threatening to jail a grieving mother wouldn’t do that any favors). Most critics wanted the shark to win and, well they technically got what they wanted in this version. The film was also compared much to Moby Dick.
The real life fear of going into the ocean after the Movie’s release is even worse in this timeline because the main characters died with the shark. The Jaws ripoffs follow like in real life, the most famous one being Piranha. Because of the deaths of the characters, Jaws 2 is still made but Schneider does not return and the focus is on the three other returning actors: Murray Hamilton as the Mayor, Lloraine Gary as Brody’s widow and Jeffrey Kramer as Deputy Jeff Hendricks. Jeff is the one to kill the shark in Jaws 2. Jaws 3D follows and sadly so does the worst one: Jaws the Revenge.
Halloween-1978 and Halloween II(1981)
The film is possibly more successful if less scary as it appears the film ended conclusively. Halloween II’s release is unexpected but still welcome. Halloween III is instead a final chapter to the trilogy. Carpenter returned to direct because he already implied Michael needed to die three times. Since Laurie and Loomis are dead, the series is considered finished and no new films are made until the Rob Zombie remake.
John Carpenter working on Halloween III pushes his other film, The Thing, to a later release date in 1983 while Halloween III is released in 1982. The film does better than it did our timeline, where it had to compete with E.T. that same year, the contrast between the heartwarming alien film and horror alien film damaged the Thing's box office. Since the reroll E.T. is half action film this disparity doesn’t exist. Carpenter never adapts Christine into a film, which he only did because The Thing didn’t do well and he needed the money as a result.
Alien-1979
Like in our timeline, a slew of Ripoffs and similar films follow like the unlicensed Alien 2: On Earth and Roger Corman’s Galaxy of Terror, though these films now have their aliens using hallucination abilities.
Along with Sigourney, John Hurt and Yaphet Kotto return for Aliens. Usually this means they would have to turn down other roles but both Hurt and Kotto were doing now forgotten action films so its no big loss. Hurt turns down appearing in Jape Speed and Kotto in Eye of the Tiger.
That one scene parodying Alien in Space Balls is intact but with Tom Skerritt instead of John Hurt. The alien bursts out of his chest and he says “oh no. Not again”.
The 2019 school play of Aliens still happens, but the children’s book telling the story of Alien from the cat’s point of view doesn’t.
Raiders of the Lost Ark-1981
In addition to raiders I also decided to add a reroll a fan mentioned doing of the Last Crusade in which Indy dies but his father is restored by the Grail. Temple of Doom is a prequel to Raiders and remains pretty much intact, Last Crusade’s ending is different. There is no Kingdom of the Crystal Skull because of the idea of that movie was conceived by Lucas when he filmed a scene of an old Indy in the Young Indiana Jones Chronicles. Since Indy dies in our version of the Last Crusade, that scene doesn't exist to inspire Lucas. That scene convinced Lucas to do an Indiana Jones movie set in the 1950’s. Therefore the film does not exist.
Also one South Park now doesn’t exist, the one where Spielberg and Lucas rape Indiana Jones based on Kingdom of the Crystal Skull's feedback, and the one where the ending parodies raiders of the Lost Ark is different, parodying the scene in the reroll where the ark is opened by the protagonists instead.
For Your Eyes Only-1981
Due to the opening not killing Blofeld, he goes on to become the villain of the film alongside its actual villain and is killed at its conclusion.
Time Bandits-1981
Will rewrite this once the film is done but naturally the confusing bit referencing a film that hasn’t come out yet was dismissed as Gilliam’s surreal writing.
E.T.-1982
Spielberg faced a plagiarism charge due to a similar short story called “The Alien”. This does not happen here, the film is different enough. The surprising appearance of Ronald Reagan in the film so soon after his election as well as him being unfazed by the moon being destroyed made it appear as a propaganda piece. It was still a success.
A sequel: E.T. II: Nocturnal Fears was written in 1982(a short film scripted in our timeline but Spielberg didn’t like it because it was an action movie which clashed with the first film, it fits perfectly to this version). Nocturnal Fears involves E.T. having to rescue Elliot and his family from the evil aliens. In order to make it, Spielberg passed on directing a segment in The Twilight Zone: The Movie.
Note:
The Amblin Logo is different due to that scene not happening.
The infamous E.T. Atari game chose to instead focus on the scene with the Barrys shooting up the base, it still didn’t save the company and the Video Game crash happened still.
E.T.’s species still appears in the Phantom Menace.
The E.T. World in Lego Demensions is significantly more fun now. Including being given a sidequest from Ronald Reagan.
The Comcast commercial with E.T. could still happen.
Blade Runner: 1982
Blade Runner is different enough already from its source book that the book doesn’t have to change. Outcome remains the same except for the lack of the Tears in the rain scene in actual rain, and the ambiguity of Deckard being a replicant not existing. A video game is released which is famous for its multiple endings, but that video game is instead about surviving being killed by a Blade Runner instead.
Friday the 13th the Final Chapter-Summer Spell/1984
The film is released as Summerspell but is sold as a rater R film in late night movie matinees. It is then released under its real title. Nothing really changes.
Goonies-1985
Goonies is still a hit. Tourists swarm the locations of the house and Peartree university. They’re appearance in Video Games changes to reflect the new plot.
Labyrinth-1986- Unchanged.
Stand By Me-1986
Still seen as a coming of age story and the films it inspired like Boyz n the Hood, Now and Then and Tarantino’s habit of writing characters talking about Pop Culture are intact.
Princess Bride-1987
Princess Bride was a William Goldman book first written in 1973. Because of the more raunchy version in the Film Reroll, It’s a tougher sell even with Goldman having written Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. However, because it is a shorter story than the original book, some of the original would be directors are more able to make it. Francois Truffaut directs it in the 1970’s(not sure which of his films it replaces). It starred the original choice for Wesley: Christopher Reeves. The film was not a major hit but gained a cult following.
Back to the Future Part II-1989
A long gambit between Robert Zemeckis and Terry Gilliam was attempted to pay off, unfortunately Zemeckis was busy with who Framed Roger Rabbit and Bob Gale on his own wrote a script that ended in a time paradox destroying the universe. The studio pulled the plug when Gale refused to rewrite it. Back to the Future II was never made(this may change if Time Bandits alters the original ending). As a consequence neither does Back to the Future Part III.
Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure-1989
The Film is an even bigger success than it was in our timeline given the focus on more action. It fills the void left behind by no Back to the Future Part II.
However, the biggest change is Napoleon’s involvement. For the film to work, Napoleon must have(in the hypothetical universe the film was made in), have disappeared or been killed in 1805 during a battle in Austria. Another Reddit user once explained how pulling Napoleon out of time would change history. It can be Found here: https://www.reddit.com/filmreroll/comments/78it6o/how_bill_and_ted_kidnapping_napoleon_would_change/
We’ll say in this timeline the Holy Roman Empire still exists. Prussia conquered the lands that would become Germany in our timeline, with Prussia itself eventually becoming Germany as we know it(at least with the Nazis since Raiders of the Lost Ark has them. Let’s say Otto Von Bismarck led a rebellion that saw Prussia fall and become Germany. Italy still formed and the monarchy of Spain was still overthrown.
Weekend at Bernie’s-1989
The film would probably be more popular but as a drama comedy. Actor Jonathan Silverman would probably have a chance doing drama, as opposed to mostly being known for comedies in our timeline. It’s unlikely weekend and Bernies II is made.
License to Kill-1989
Timothy Dalton was already unpopular in the role and License to Kill was his last film anyway, so in this timeline we’ll say they decided to kill him off and introduce the new James Bond in universe. Pierce Brosnan was already a choice. The film killed off Dalton’s Bond and then revealed James Bond to be a code name used by several agents, directly mentioning other James Bond actors. Brosnan’s Bond then went onto defeat the film’s villain. Brosnan was given a three film contact with the option of a fourth. He appeared in License to Kill but then the Bond rights went into question until 1994, when Brosnan would return to do Goldeneye in 1995, and finally Tomorrow Never Dies, where like Dalton he would be killed off in the opening, after refusing to come back for a fourth film.
With Dalton out in 1997, MGM went with their backup choice: Paul McGann, who had previously played the Doctor in a Doctor Who TV movie. McGann appears in Tomorrow Never Dies, the World is Not Enough, and Die Another Day. After that that Eon decided to reboot the series with Daniel Craig. Skyfall's plot is changed as since it's Bond's 50th anniversary. All the Bond actors appear with the deceased Dalton and Brosnan Bond appeared in flashbacks.
Home Alone-1990
he Home Alone house is demolished in the film. This is a big deal in hindsight due to 80’s classics like Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Sixteen Candles, Planes, Trains & Automobiles, she’s having a baby, and Uncle Buck having been filmed there but since the house is not famous at the time, it is demolished with no protest.
There is no Home Alone 2 because of the death of Joe Pesci’s character and the destruction of the house.
Thelma and Louise-1991-Nothing really changes.
Aladdin-1992
One change in production is in our timeline the Sultan was based on the Wizard of Oz, who is more benevolent in this timeline given the rerolled Wizard of Oz.
After the film’s release, there is a demand for a sequel, its production is pushed back because of the legal disputes between Robin Williams and Disney. Since getting his voice is an important part of the film, the sequel is halted until the legal problems are resolved. Aladdin the Animated series still exists as it is set before Aladdin and Jasmine are married but after Jasmine’s wish. The sequel: Aladdin II: Return of Jaffar, is released in 1996 as a full featured film.Disney’s the Hunchback of Notre Dame is pushed back.
Regarding Hunchback of Notre Dame, Jason Alexander does not play the Gargoyle Hugo because he got the role after playing a villain in The Return of Jaffar which he could still do, just after Hunchback of Notre Dame is released in 1997.
Disney’s Hercules does not exist and I’ll tell you why.
Writers Ron Clements and John Musker wanted to make a film called “Treasure Planet”. Then Disney head John Katzenberg promised that if they made another hit film he would approve their dream project. The duo had just finished Aladdin and so they made Aladdin II here instead, which fulfilled that promise and so Treasure Planet is released in 1997. Sadly it does not do well(neither did Hercules or the film in our timeline).
Given Treasure Planet’s new placement: Brother Bear is released in 2002, Home on the Range in 2003, Chicken Little in 2004, Meet the Robinsons in 2006, and Bolt in 2007.
Things get back on track with Princess and the Frog because Ron Clements and John Musker returned to direct it because the company needed traditional animators and so it is released on schedule the same as our timeline.
Homeward Bound-1993
Scottish author Sheila Burnford wrote the original book, the incredible Journey in 1961. It was not a children’s book as in our timeline. Because of its darker tone, The Incredible Journey is not adapted by Disney into a live action film in 1963. It is instead adapted by Miramax. As is the sequel Lost in San Francisco, which includes Flynn the Fox.
Jurassic Park-1993
The film is different enough from the book. The film surpassed Spielberg’s E.T. in gross. Jurassic Park’s legacy remains the same including inspiring Lucas to make the Star Wars prequels, Peter Jackson to make Lord of the Rings and King Kong and so on. Unseen by the characters was Richard Attenborough’s death(which he actually wanted to kept from the book. here he got the dramatic death he wanted). The franchise continues as in our timeline including retconning Ian Malcom’s death(as he didn’t die on screen in the film.
Speed-1994
Speed is a short film in this universe with no big name actors.
Jumanji-1995
Tim Curry turns down a role to appear in the Shadow because of his appearance in this film. The rest of the movies still happens but naturally the plot of Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle is different.
From Dusk Till Dawn-1996
The Bad sequels still exist, including a video game starring Jean Claude van Damme’s character. Van Damme gave up a role in Maximum Risk to be in this film.
The Rock-1996- Still in process.
Pokemon:The First Movie-1998
Changes the entirety of the early franchise by having Mewtwo appear as a villain since he didn’t reform but now also implying he will team up with other Villains. Also Meowth’s death.
Practical magic-1998- Nothing really changes.
The Mummy-1999
The film is never made since the titular mummy never surfaces due to events in the scene Rerolled. Neither does the animated spinoff, the sequels of the Scorpion King. However, the film is likely made by someone else as there were multiple attempts by others directors to make the film before the one we got.
O’Brother Where Art Thou-2000- No major changes. While the reroll ending is more open ended, several Coen brothers films end that way anyway.
Pirates of the Caribbean-2003- It may be considered too sexual and so is not aired at Disney World as it was in our timeline or at showings with kids. It's likely still a success with sequels following.
Doctor Who: Day of the Moon-2011
The Doctor who writers may introduce a plot about changing time so much having consequences. There would be things like Vietnam ending in 1969 and Nixon likely having multiple terms in Office(which also happened in the parallel universe from Back to the Future Part II but that doesn’t exist in this timeline).
Frozen-2013
This version isn’t a musical and therefore none of the Musical elements including kids obsessing with the song happen. Also since the reroll version doesn’t break away or poke fun at Disney cliches, the Disney cliches are played straight in later films like Moana.
Iron Man 3-2013
Stan Lee’s cameos are now him playing the President of the United States, starting from Iron Man 3(removing his earlier cameo), and continuing to Thor: The Dark World, Captain America: The Winter Soldier,Age of Ultron(still getting drunk at the party though), Ant-Man, Captain America: Civil War, Doctor Strange, Spider-Man: Homecoming, Black Panther, Infinity War, Ant-Man and the Wasp. He is mentioned as having passed away in Endgame. He is not the President character in the Guardians of the Galaxy films, Thor: Ragnarok ,Captain Marvel or Endgame but still appears playing someone else.
Assuming President Ellis replaces Obama(as is implied, to clarify Obama exists but is clearly not president, so its assumed he lost the election to Ellis) then Ellis was elected in 2008 and won again in 2012 before resigning in 2013 due to his injuries. President Stan Lee then presumably went onto win the presidency on his own in 2016(defeating Trump and/or Hilary Clinton), before passing away in 2019, leaving an unknown successor leading into the 2020 Presidential election.
As for James Rhodes, I feel he would make a surprise appearance during Captain America: Civil War, considering Scarlet Witch was under house arrest. However, he’s likely not to show up in Avengers: Infinity War but would in Endgame.
John Wick-2014
The film is instead titled “Scorn”. It’s working title since John Wick is no longer the protagonist. It’s still pretty successful as a darker crime film. No sequels exist naturally but, the film Hobbs and Shaw changes. With Keanu now being free to pursue other roles, he appears as the main villain of Hobbs and Shaw instead of Idris Elba.
Rogue One-2016
The film is not called Tiramisu and is called something else like “Death Star”. It’s not called Juno or Stardust because of other films with those names. The film’s ending and good reception lead to a second film set during the first Star Wars film, which replaces Solo: A Star Wars Story and fares much better at the box office.
Adventure Time: Elements Arc-2017
This would likely add an arc where Flame Princess’s father declares war on Ooo and at least an episode where Finn struggles with guilt with some very dark subject matter as a result. The latter conflict is resolved with Flame Princess’s much nicer new boyfriend taking over the Fire Kingdom. The finale changes depending on who the reformed Ice King sides with but the final boss fight doesn’t happen because the final boss monster was summoned by Betty to try and change Simon back which there’s no reason to here.
submitted by MarcoIncognito to filmreroll [link] [comments]


2020.02.18 07:30 Noobmasternoobmaster What do you think of this idea?

I know there will never be a mod that would make Los Santos as big as real life Los Angeles. But what if a map expansion was possible. And it could combine with other modes. two mods being the drug dealethug and the gang war mod. With a bigger city more gangs can be added. Think how insane it would be. With these gangs having gangs wars in a map expansion of Los Santos. Fighting over turf and drugs. Hear are the gangs ( Warring this is really really long)

The Ultimate Gang War Mod
African American
Barksdale Organization – The Wire
Black Viceroys – Watch Dogs[1]
The Bombers – Mafia II
The Brotherhood – Person of Interest[2]
Cash Money Brothers (CMB) – New Jack City[3]
East Holland Drug Crew – Grand Theft Auto IV
Golden Lords – Meteor Man[4]
Gramercy Riffs – The Warriors[5]
Hot Boyz – Gang Law
New Day Co-Op – The Wire
O'Day crime family – Romeo Must Die
One-Niners – The Shield and Sons of Anarchy[6]
Pope Partners, Inc. – Sons of Anarchy
Redding Organization – Oz
Sammy Robinson's Black Mob – Mafia III
The Bombers – Mafia II
The Six-Mile Syndicate – Warpath[3]
Stanfield Organization – The Wire
V-Dubs – Sucker Free City
Vice Kings – Saints Row[9]
32nd Street Blades – The Judge
The 580s – Watch Dogs 2
Ace Double Treys – Blue Bloods
Ballas – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto V
The Dragons – Family Matters
E-Park Johnnies – The Shield
East Dub – Sons of Anarchy
The Families – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto V
Farmtown 12 – The Shield
Fayette Street Mafia – The Wire
G-Park Lords - Chicago P.D.
Gramercy Riffs – The Warriors[5]
Headhunterz – Crime Life: Gang Wars
K2K – Saw
Lennox Avenue Boys (LA Boys) – New Jack City
Money Over Bitches (MOB) – Grand Theft Auto IV
Money Street Kings (MSK) – Blue Bloods
The Moonrunners – The Warriors[5]
North Holland Hustlers – Grand Theft Auto IV
Outlawz – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Southside Hoods – Grand Theft Auto III
Purple Nines – Grand Theft Auto III
Red Jacks – Grand Theft Auto III
Spookstreet Souljahs – The Shield
Unique Splitz – Blue Bloods
Uptown Assassins – Blue Bloods
Uptown Riders – Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned
V-Dubs – Sucker Free City
50.Van Cortlandt Rangers – The Warriors[5]

Hispanic
21st Street Gang – Colors
Altamira – Bright
Los Alvos – Lethal Weapon
Amigos – Adam-12
Los Angelicos – Gang Related
The Apostles – Miami Vice
Araña – Call of Juarez: The Cartel
Aztecs – The Shield
BX9 – Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Byzantine Latinos (Byz Lats) – The Shield, The Unit and Sons of Anarchy
Los Cabrones – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Cazadores – Castle
Cholos – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
Cobra Familia - CSI:Miami
Comando Sombra (C.S.) – Max Payne 3
Crazy Aces - CSI:NY
Curbside Gang – End of Watch
Diablos – Grand Theft Auto III
Los Diablos – Hill Street Blues
Dogwood Crew– Mayans M.C.
Eagle Rocks – Adam-12
East Harlem El Puño - CSI:NY
East Side Hermanos - CSI:Miami
East-Side Catorces - The Closer
Espinosa Gang – Breaking Bad
Farmtown Mijos – The Shield
Filhos De Ogum – Max Payne 3
La Fuerza – Snowfall
Hermanos Tainos – Power
Hillside Trece – Training Day
The Hurricanes – The Warriors[5]
The Innocentz – Manhunt
The Baby Faces – Manhunt
Malos – Manhunt
Muerte 187 – Manhunt
The Skullyz – Manhunt
Kappin' Off Suckers (KOS) – One Eight Seven
Latin Priests - Chicago P.D.
Los Locos – Short Circuit 2
Locotes Doces (L-12) – Law & Order
Los Lordes – Blue Bloods
Los Magnificos (Los Mags) – The Shield
Marabunta Grande – Grand Theft Auto V
Los Matadores – Predator: Concrete Jungle
Los Pozoleros – Blue Bloods
Los Profetas – The Shield
Peyote Kings - Dredd (2012 film)
San Fierro Rifa – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
El Salvadorans – The Shield
Sharks – West Side Story
Soldado Nation – Power
Southend Kings - NCIS:LA
Spanish Lords – Grand Theft Auto IV
Los Toros – The Shield
Torrucos – The Shield
Tezcas – Watch Dogs 2
Todos Locos – Power
Triple 2s – Sons of Anarchy
Tropa Z – Max Payne 3
Vagos – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Varrios Los Aztecas – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
La Vida Mala – NCIS
61.Webster Avenue Boys – Blue Bloods

Afrikaner organized crime[edit]
The Order – Soldier of Fortune
Van Hardenburg Syndicate – Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
3.Vorstedt Gang – Lethal Weapon 2

Albanian mafia[edit]
Albanian gang – Power
Marko Hoxha's trafficking ring – Taken
Petrela Gang – Grand Theft Auto IV
Sesseri Syndicate – SOCOM II
5.Vulaj Gang – Gangs of London

Asian ethnicity[edit]
Avon Park Playboys – The Mentalist
Axe Gang – Kung Fu Hustle, Boxer From Shantung, Project A Part II, Drunken Master II, Once Upon a Time in Shanghai (2014 film), Shanghai Affairs, Marrying the Mafia II and Marrying the Mafia III
Black Dragon Mafia – Today You Die
Blue Squares – Durarara!!
Bushido – Need For Speed: Carbon
Chung Yee Gang - Blood Stained Tradewinds
Flying Dragons – Year of the Dragon
Fuk Ching Boys – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Fukienese Dragons – The Corrupter
Ghost Shadows – Year of the Dragon
Green Dragons – Revenge of the Green Dragons
The Heavens – Shenmue II
Hiragana Gang - NCIS:LA
K-Town Killers – The Shield
Kampai Dragons - CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lords of Death – Big Trouble in Little China
Poison Brothers – Shenmue II
Savage Huns – The Warriors[5]
The Red Dragons - Dredd (2012 film)
Tsoo - City of Heroes
Tung On Boys – Revenge of the Green Dragons
White Tigers – Revenge of the Green Dragons
The Wongs – The Wanderers
27.Yellow Scarves – Durarara!!

White American
The Ghoulies – Riverdale
Green Street Elite (GSE) – Green Street
The Hi-Hats – The Warriors[5]
The Hoods – Manhunt
The Jets – West Side Story
Jones Street Boys – The Warriors[5]
Juvenite Pack-9 – Predator: Concrete Jungle
The Kings – Fallout: New Vegas
Liberty Republic – Martial Law
The Lords – Happy Days
Ministry of Sin – Soldier of Fortune
Nordics – Sons of Anarchy
Pogue Mahones – Crime Life: Gang Wars
The Punks – The Warriors[5]
The Red Kings – Manhunt 2
The Rogues – The Warriors[5]
The Shamrocks – Hill Street Blues
The Skinz – Manhunt
The Snakebacks - CSI:Crime Scene Investigation
Todd's Gang – Beavis and Butthead
Two-Threes - Chicago P.D.
Van Buren Boys – Seinfeld
The Wanderers – The Wanderers
Jack Welker's crew – Breaking Bad
Westside Rollerz – Saints Row[9]
Wormsley Common Gang – "The Destructors
The Brotherhood
28.Alliance of Whites

Italian mafia[edit][edit]
Bonasera crime family – She Hate Me
Bonelli Crew – Grand Theft Auto V
Borgia crime family – Predator: Concrete Jungle
Cacuzza Crew – Sons of Anarchy
Castiglione crime family – The Executioner
Clemente crime family – Mafia II
Clericuzio crime family – The Last Don
The Commission – Grand Theft Auto IV
Ancelotti crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Gambetti crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Lupisella crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Messina crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Pavano crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Damiano crime family – Law & Order: Criminal Intent
D'Amico crime family – The Simpsons
DeBenedetto crime family – The Sopranos
DeMarco crime family – Max Payne 3
DiGeorge crime family – The Executioner
DiMeo crime family – The Sopranos
Altieri/Gervasi Crew – The Sopranos
Aprile/Cifaretto/Spatafore Crew – The Sopranos
Barese Crew – The Sopranos
Moltisanti Crew – The Sopranos
Junior Soprano/Baccalieri Crew – The Sopranos
Soprano/Gualtieri Crew – The Sopranos
DiMera family – Days of Our Lives
Drago crime family – The Godfather Returns
Falcone crime family – Mafia II
Five Families – The Godfather
Barzini crime family – The Godfather
Cuneo crime family – The Godfather
Corleone crime family – The Godfather
Stracci crime family – The Godfather
Tattaglia crime family – The Godfather
Forelli crime family – Grand Theft Auto III and Grand Theft Auto San Andreas
Forlenza crime family – The Godfather
Lakeville Road Boys – The Godfather
Frenchi crime family – The Executioner
39.Gravina crime family – Mafia II

Armenian mafia[edit]
Armenian Might – The Shield
Los Santos Armenian Mob – Grand Theft Auto V
Malakian clan – Le Premier Cercle
4.Tavanian crime family – One in the Chamber

Azerbaijani mafia[edit]
1.Oil Mafia – Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: Rogue Spear

Dixie Mafia and State Line Mob[edit]
Ritchie Doucet's Dixie Mafia – Mafia III
Gator Gang – Hitman: Blood Money
The Horsemen – Criminal Minds
Husser crime family – Claws
O'Neil Brothers – Grand Theft Auto V
The Rednecks – Grand Theft Auto 2
Southern Union – Mafia III
8.Trailer Park Mafia – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories

Georgian mafia[edit]
Ashvilli Gang – Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
2.Dvali crime family – Deus Ex: Manki

Greek mafia[edit]
Greek Antique Smugglers – CSI:NY
The Greeks – The Wire
3.Kiriakis family – Days of Our Lives

Haitian organized crime[edit]
1.Baka's Haitian Mob – Mafia III
2.Drifty's Hatian Gang – Power
3.Auntie Poulet's Haitian Gang – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
4.Les Serviteurs – Predator: Concrete Jungle
5.Sons of Samedi – Saints Row 2
6.The Zobops – Miami Vice
7.Vance crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories[8]

Hungarian mafia[edit]
Gogolak crime family – The Whole Nine Yards
2.Hungarian gang – The Usual Suspects



Indian mafia[edit]
Mr. Rhaman's Organization – Gangs of London
2.Sarkar's organization – Sarkar

Irish Mob[edit]
Breakaway IRA Faction – Criminal Minds
Bridge Street Gang – Oz
Brodie Gang – Mafia II
Burke crime family – Mafia III
Chicago South Club – Watch Dogs
Costello Gang – The Departed
Donnelly crime family – The Black Donnellys
Fitzpatrick crime family – Veronica Mars
Flannery crime family – State of Grace
Irish American Killers – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Kitchen Irish – Daredevil and The Punisher
Maguire family – Shameless
McReary crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
O'Hare family – Leverage
O'Mara crime family – Person of Interest
O'Neill Gang – Mafia II
Pogue Mahones – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Sullivan crime family – The Darknessiu
True Irish Republican Army (TIRA) – Sons of Anarchy
West Side Boys – Sleepers
21.Wilder crime family – CSI: NY

Jamaican posses and Yardies[edit]
Balseros Crew – Mercenaries 2: World in Flames
Brotherhood of Jah Army of Love – Grand Theft Auto
Clerkenwell Yardies – The Getaway
EC2 Crew – Gangs of London
Hillside Posse – Grand Theft Auto IV
KYC – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Desmond Maxwell's gang – Miami Vice
Screwface's woodoo gang – Marked for Death
Splash Posse – The Shield
Storm Posse – A Brief History of Seven Killings
Uptown Yardies – Grand Theft Auto III and Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories
12.Voodoo Posse – Predator 2

Jewish Mob[edit]
Lopez Cartel – Scarface
Roth Syndicate – The Godfather Part II
3.Isaac Roth's Jewish Mob – Grand Theft Auto IV


Korean mafia[edit]
9 Khan – Gang Related
Chang Syndicate – Outrage Coda
Choongshim Gang – Sweet, Savage Family
Goldmoon International – New World
Jaebum Clan - New World
Jang Syndicate – Lucy
Jingweon Mafia – Yakuza 2 and Yakuza 6
K-Town Killers – The Shield
Kampai Dragons – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Kim Gang – Dark Blue
Kim Syndicate – Street Kings
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lee Gang – Oldboy
Lee Syndicate – Dark Blue
Lim Gang – Collateral
Los Santos Kkangpae – Grand Theft Auto V
Midtown Gangsters – Grand Theft Auto IV
Wonsu Nodong – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Northmoon Clan – New World
Scissor Gang – My Wife Is a Gangster and My Wife is a Gangster 2
Shin Kkangpae – Power
White Tiger Gang – Marrying the Mafia II, Marrying the Mafia III and Marrying the 22.Mafia IV

Nicaraguan organized crime[edit]
The DL – Scorpion
Menendez Cartel – Call of Duty Black Ops II

Pakistani mafia[edit]
Talwar Sword Brothers (TSB) – Gangs of London

Romanian mafia[edit]
Ciupanezu's gang – Băieți buni
7.Negrea Gang – Wheelman


Russian mafia[edit]
Bulgarin crime syndicate – Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
Faustin/Rascalov Mafiya – Grand Theft Auto IV
Hotel Moscow – Black Lagoon
Janus Syndicate – GoldenEye
Kovski Bratva – Grand Theft Auto 2
Nezhinski crime family – We Own the Night
Petrovic crime syndicate – Grand Theft Auto IV
Putlova Bratva – Sons of Anarchy
9.San Andreas Bratva – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

Serbian mafia[edit]
Vladimir Janokvic's Serbian Gang – Power
Milan's criminal organization – Power
3.Jason Micic's Serbian Mob - Power

Spanish organized crime[edit]
Los Chulos Canallas – Wheelman
El "gang" del "Chicharrón" – Mort & Phil[10]
3.Los Lantos – Wheelman

Triads and Tongs[edit]
108 Dragons/Sons of the Dragons – Crying Freeman
18K Triad – Sleeping Dogs
54 Immortals – Call of Duty Black Ops III
Agni Kai Triad – The Legend of Korra
Auntie Shu Boys – Watch Dogs 2
Axe Gang – Kung Fu Hustle, Boxer From Shantung, Project A Part II, Drunken Master II, Once Upon a Time in Shanghai (2014 film), Shanghai Affairs, Marrying the Mafia II and Marrying the Mafia III
Bai-Lan – Burst Angel
Baoliusung Gang – Tenchu
Black Hand Triad – Akatsuki Blitzkampf
Black Tiger Gang – Rise of the Legend
Blood Feather Triad – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Blue Lotus Triad – Hitman: Codename 47
Blue Snake Syndicate – Cowboy Bebop
Char Siu Mafia – Nisekoi
Chang Sing Tong – Big Trouble in Little China
Chang Triad – War
Chen Long Tang – Darker Than Black
Chen Triad – Mayans M.C.
Chi You Men – Shenmue and Shenmue II
Chung Yee Gang – Blood Stained Tradewinds
Dragon Claw Triad – Stranglehold
Imperial Nines Triad (I9s) – Stranglehold
Dragon Skulls – The Mole Song: Hong Kong Capriccio
Dragon Triad – Psych
Empire Bay Tong – Mafia II
Fu Cang Long Triad – Rush Hour 2
Golden Dragon Association – Police Story 4: First Strike
Golden Kane Triad – Stranglehold
Golden Triad – Psych
Grant City Triad – Dead to Rights
Hatchets – Iron Fist
Hong Yiban Triad – Noir
Hun San Tong – Year of the Dragon
Hung Hing Triad – Young and Dangerous (film series), Triads: The Inside Story, The Secret Society – Boss and Century of the Dragon
Hung Pang Triad – Year of the Dragon
Inner Demons – Spider-Man
Jaoming crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Lee crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Lin Triad – Sons of Anarchy
Mountain Cloud Boys – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Ming crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Nam Soong Triad – Year of the Dragon
Northern Sea Gang – Rise of the Legend
Red Arrow – Deus Ex
Red Circle Triad – Nikita
Red Dragons – Dredd
Red Dragon Syndicate – Cowboy Bebop
Red Dragon Tong – The Terror of the Tongs
Saio Triad – Yakuza 6
San Luen Triad – Young and Dangerous
Shadow Tong – True Crime: New York City
Vice City Triad – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Wah Feng Triad – Police Story
Water Dragon Triad – Gangs of London
Wei Cheng Triad – Grand Theft Auto V
White Lotus Society – Necropolis
Söze Gang – The Usual Suspects
60.Vadideki Kurt – Waking the Dead

Turkish mafia[edit]
Council of the Wolves – Valley of the Wolves
Söze Gang – The Usual Suspects
3.Vadideki Kurt – Waking the Dead

Ukrainian mafia[edit]
Koshka Brotherhood – Dexter
2.Zakarov Syndicate – Stranglehold

Vietnamese gangs and Vietnamese mafias[edit]
Butterfly Children – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Da Nang Boys – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Flaming Dragon – Tropic Thunder
Shining Razors – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
5.Wolf Gang – Tracer

Yakuza[edit]
Ashura-kai - Shin Megami Tensei IV
Asuki Group – Durarara!!
Azai Corporation - G-Senjou no Maou
Anan Clan - Sonatine (1993 film)
Black Dragon - Nikolai Dante
Crazy 88 – Kill Bill
Danno Organization - Japan Organized Crime Boss
Date Family - Kikoku
Hachinosu-kai - The Mole Song: Undercover Agent Reiji
Haguro Family - Wolf Guy - Wolfen Crest
Hakushin Society – Crying Freeman
Hamayasu Family - Bloodstained Clan Honor
Hana-Gumi - Worst (manga)
Hanada Clan – Crying Freeman
Omi Alliance – Yakuza, Yakuza 2, Yakuza 3, Yakuza: Dead Souls and Yakuza 5
Go-Ryu Clan – Yakuza 2, Yakuza: Dead Souls and Yakuza 0
Sengoku Family – Yakuza 2
18.Takashima Clan – Yakuza 2

Drug cartels[edit]
Aquila Cartel – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Baja Diablo Cartel – The Shield
Barillo Cartel – Once Upon a Time in Mexico
Braga Cartel – Fast & Furious
Calderone Cartel - Miami Vice
Los Carnales – Saints Row[9]
The Cartel – Grand Theft Auto III
Caza Cartel - Graceland (TV series)
Cortez Cartel – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Culiacan Cartel – Hawaii Five-0
Delgado Cartel – Hitman: Blood Money
Diaz Cartel – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Eighty-Sevens – Dexter
Flaming Dragon – Tropic Thunder
Galindo Cartel – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans M.C.
Lobos Sonora Cartel – Sons of Anarchy
Loco Syndicate – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Lopez Cartel – Scarface
Lugo Cartel - Criminal Minds
Madrazo Cartel – Grand Theft Auto V
Magdalena Cartel – True Crime: New York City
Moreno Cartel - HITMAN™ 2
Morientes Cartel – Total Overdose
Los Muertos – Crackdown
Muerte Cartel – Total Overdose
Navarro Cartel - Ozark
Northwood Dominican Drug Cartel – Grand Theft Auto IV
Ochoa Cartel – Hitman: Codename 47
Orajuela Cartel – Saints Row
Revolutionary Armed Forces of Brazil (RAFB) – SOCOM II
Reynosa Cartel – NCIS
Torres Cartel – Grand Theft Auto IV
Velez Cartel – Law & Order SVU
Vice City Costa Ricans – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
36.Virgillo Cartel – Total Overdose

Motorcycle gangs[edit]
666ers M.C. - Hell Ride
The Angels – Grand Theft Auto
Angels of Death – Grand Theft Auto IV, Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars and Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned
Black Rebels – The Wild One
Black Widows – Every Which Way but Loose and Any Which Way You Can
The Bombers -- Streets of Fire
Born Losers – The Born Losers
Brigands – Brigands MC
The Brotherhood – Stone Cold
Calaveras – Sons of Anarchy
Chaplains – The Substitute
Copperheads – 1%
Crucifiers – The Cannonball Run
Crypt Kings - CSI:Miami
Dark Souls – Hochelaga
Death Knights – Law & Order: SVU
Del Fuegos – Wild Hogs
Devil's Advocates – Nam's Angels
Devil's Hand – Ride to Hell: Retribution
Devil's Kings – Bad Blood
Devil's Tribe – Sons of Anarchy
Flaming Windmills – Hitman: Codename 47 and Hitman: Contracts
The Front of Armament – Crows Zero
Gonads – Hardbodies
Grave Diggers – Stone
Grim Bastards – Sons of Anarchy
Grim Creepers – Eastbound and Down
Gunthugs – Grand Theft Auto IV
Heaven's Helpers – Saints Row 2
The Hellions - Torque (film)
The Horde – The Shield
Howlers – Goldstone
The Impalers - Dear God No!
Iron Bloods – Underbelly
Iron Chains – Lost Girl
Jackals – Beyond the Law
Jesters – Starsky & Hutch
Los Lobos – NYPD Blue
The Lost – Grand Theft Auto IV, Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned and Grand Theft Auto V[8]
The Lost Boys – The Lost Boys
Mad Angels – Shenmue
Madcaps – Angels From Hell and Hells Angels On Wheels
Los Matadores – The Last Chapter
Mayans – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans MC
Mongrel Motorcycle Club – Days Gone
Noblemen – The Gauntlet
One-eyed Snakes – Bob's Burgers
One Percenters – 21 Jump Street
Order of Odin – Silent Scream
Outcasts – Homefront
Renegades – Silent Scream
Satan's Disciples – My Mother Dreams the Satan's Disciples in New York
Sons of Anarchy – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans M.C.
Sons of Ragnarok – Watch Dogs 2
Southern Outlaws – Wicked Blood
Southside Serpents – Riverdale
Swole Boys – Mayans MC
Triple Sixers – The Last Chapter
Uptown Riders – Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned, Grand Theft Auto:
Vatos Malditos - Mayans MC
Vegas Blasters – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Victors M.C. - Hell Ride
White Stallionz – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
Wizards – Justified
67.Wolfpack – Headhunter

Pacific Islander[edit]
1.Base Town Tribe – Mayans M.C.
2.Crazy Horses – Boy

Prison Gangs
1.Aryan Sons – Miami Vice
2.Aryan Vanguard – Blood In Blood Out
3.Big House Crew – Sons of Anarchy
  1. Black Nation – Sons of Anarchy
  2. Black Rats Gang - Prison on Fire II
6.El Faziz Assassins – Undisputed
7.The Executioners – Wedlock
8.The Homeboys – Oz
9.The Legion – Manhunt 2
10.El Norte – Oz
  1. La Onda – Blood In Blood Out
12.Powder Gangers – Fallout: New Vegas
13.The Smileys – Manhunt
14.SS Lowriders – Undisputed
15.White Nation – Blue Bloods
submitted by Noobmasternoobmaster to GTA [link] [comments]


2020.02.18 06:48 Noobmasternoobmaster What do you think of this idea?

I know there will never be a mod that would make Los Santos as big as real life Los Angeles. But what if a map expansion was possible. And it could combine with other modes. two mods being the drug dealethug and the gang war mod. With a bigger city more gangs can be added. Think how insane it would be. With these gangs having gangs wars in a map expansion of Los Santos. Fighting over turf and drugs. Hear are the gangs ( Warring this is really really long)





African American
Barksdale Organization – The Wire
Black Viceroys – Watch Dogs[1]
The Bombers – Mafia II
The Brotherhood – Person of Interest[2]
Cash Money Brothers (CMB) – New Jack City[3]
East Holland Drug Crew – Grand Theft Auto IV
Golden Lords – Meteor Man[4]
Gramercy Riffs – The Warriors[5]
Hot Boyz – Gang Law
New Day Co-Op – The Wire
O'Day crime family – Romeo Must Die
One-Niners – The Shield and Sons of Anarchy[6]
Pope Partners, Inc. – Sons of Anarchy
Redding Organization – Oz
Sammy Robinson's Black Mob – Mafia III
The Bombers – Mafia II
The Six-Mile Syndicate – Warpath[3]
Stanfield Organization – The Wire
V-Dubs – Sucker Free City
Vice Kings – Saints Row[9]
32nd Street Blades – The Judge
The 580s – Watch Dogs 2
Ace Double Treys – Blue Bloods
Ballas – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto V
The Dragons – Family Matters
E-Park Johnnies – The Shield
East Dub – Sons of Anarchy
The Families – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto V
Farmtown 12 – The Shield
Fayette Street Mafia – The Wire
G-Park Lords - Chicago P.D.
Gramercy Riffs – The Warriors[5]
Headhunterz – Crime Life: Gang Wars
K2K – Saw
Lennox Avenue Boys (LA Boys) – New Jack City
Money Over Bitches (MOB) – Grand Theft Auto IV
Money Street Kings (MSK) – Blue Bloods
The Moonrunners – The Warriors[5]
North Holland Hustlers – Grand Theft Auto IV
Outlawz – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Southside Hoods – Grand Theft Auto III
Purple Nines – Grand Theft Auto III
Red Jacks – Grand Theft Auto III
Spookstreet Souljahs – The Shield
Unique Splitz – Blue Bloods
Uptown Assassins – Blue Bloods
Uptown Riders – Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned
V-Dubs – Sucker Free City
50.Van Cortlandt Rangers – The Warriors[5]

Hispanic
21st Street Gang – Colors
Altamira – Bright
Los Alvos – Lethal Weapon
Amigos – Adam-12
Los Angelicos – Gang Related
The Apostles – Miami Vice
Araña – Call of Juarez: The Cartel
Aztecs – The Shield
BX9 – Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Byzantine Latinos (Byz Lats) – The Shield, The Unit and Sons of Anarchy
Los Cabrones – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Cazadores – Castle
Cholos – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
Cobra Familia - CSI:Miami
Comando Sombra (C.S.) – Max Payne 3
Crazy Aces - CSI:NY
Curbside Gang – End of Watch
Diablos – Grand Theft Auto III
Los Diablos – Hill Street Blues
Dogwood Crew– Mayans M.C.
Eagle Rocks – Adam-12
East Harlem El Puño - CSI:NY
East Side Hermanos - CSI:Miami
East-Side Catorces - The Closer
Espinosa Gang – Breaking Bad
Farmtown Mijos – The Shield
Filhos De Ogum – Max Payne 3
La Fuerza – Snowfall
Hermanos Tainos – Power
Hillside Trece – Training Day
The Hurricanes – The Warriors[5]
The Innocentz – Manhunt
The Baby Faces – Manhunt
Malos – Manhunt
Muerte 187 – Manhunt
The Skullyz – Manhunt
Kappin' Off Suckers (KOS) – One Eight Seven
Latin Priests - Chicago P.D.
Los Locos – Short Circuit 2
Locotes Doces (L-12) – Law & Order
Los Lordes – Blue Bloods
Los Magnificos (Los Mags) – The Shield
Marabunta Grande – Grand Theft Auto V
Los Matadores – Predator: Concrete Jungle
Los Pozoleros – Blue Bloods
Los Profetas – The Shield
Peyote Kings - Dredd (2012 film)
San Fierro Rifa – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
El Salvadorans – The Shield
Sharks – West Side Story
Soldado Nation – Power
Southend Kings - NCIS:LA
Spanish Lords – Grand Theft Auto IV
Los Toros – The Shield
Torrucos – The Shield
Tezcas – Watch Dogs 2
Todos Locos – Power
Triple 2s – Sons of Anarchy
Tropa Z – Max Payne 3
Vagos – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Varrios Los Aztecas – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
La Vida Mala – NCIS
61.Webster Avenue Boys – Blue Bloods

Afrikaner organized crime[edit]
The Order – Soldier of Fortune
Van Hardenburg Syndicate – Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
3.Vorstedt Gang – Lethal Weapon 2

Albanian mafia[edit]
Albanian gang – Power
Marko Hoxha's trafficking ring – Taken
Petrela Gang – Grand Theft Auto IV
Sesseri Syndicate – SOCOM II
5.Vulaj Gang – Gangs of London

Asian[edit]
Avon Park Playboys – The Mentalist
Axe Gang – Kung Fu Hustle, Boxer From Shantung, Project A Part II, Drunken Master II, Once Upon a Time in Shanghai (2014 film), Shanghai Affairs, Marrying the Mafia II and Marrying the Mafia III
Black Dragon Mafia – Today You Die
Blue Squares – Durarara!!
Bushido – Need For Speed: Carbon
Chung Yee Gang - Blood Stained Tradewinds
Flying Dragons – Year of the Dragon
Fuk Ching Boys – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Fukienese Dragons – The Corrupter
Ghost Shadows – Year of the Dragon
Green Dragons – Revenge of the Green Dragons
The Heavens – Shenmue II
Hiragana Gang - NCIS:LA
K-Town Killers – The Shield
Kampai Dragons - CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lords of Death – Big Trouble in Little China
Poison Brothers – Shenmue II
Savage Huns – The Warriors[5]
The Red Dragons - Dredd (2012 film)
Tsoo - City of Heroes
Tung On Boys – Revenge of the Green Dragons
White Tigers – Revenge of the Green Dragons
The Wongs – The Wanderers
27.Yellow Scarves – Durarara!!
9 Khan – Gang Related
Chang Syndicate – Outrage Coda
Choongshim Gang – Sweet, Savage Family
Goldmoon International – New World
Jaebum Clan - New World
Jang Syndicate – Lucy
Jingweon Mafia – Yakuza 2 and Yakuza 6
Kim Gang – Dark Blue
Kim Syndicate – Street Kings
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lee Gang – Oldboy
Lee Syndicate – Dark Blue
Lim Gang – Collateral
Los Santos Kkangpae – Grand Theft Auto V
Midtown Gangsters – Grand Theft Auto IV
Wonsu Nodong – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Northmoon Clan – New World
Scissor Gang – My Wife Is a Gangster and My Wife is a Gangster 2
Shin Kkangpae – Power
White Tiger Gang – Marrying the Mafia II, Marrying the Mafia III and Marrying the 47.Mafia IV

White American
The Ghoulies – Riverdale
Green Street Elite (GSE) – Green Street
The Hi-Hats – The Warriors[5]
The Hoods – Manhunt
The Jets – West Side Story
Jones Street Boys – The Warriors[5]
Juvenite Pack-9 – Predator: Concrete Jungle
The Kings – Fallout: New Vegas
Liberty Republic – Martial Law
The Lords – Happy Days
Ministry of Sin – Soldier of Fortune
Nordics – Sons of Anarchy
Pogue Mahones – Crime Life: Gang Wars
The Punks – The Warriors[5]
The Red Kings – Manhunt 2
The Rogues – The Warriors[5]
The Shamrocks – Hill Street Blues
The Skinz – Manhunt
The Snakebacks - CSI:Crime Scene Investigation
Todd's Gang – Beavis and Butthead
Two-Threes - Chicago P.D.
Van Buren Boys – Seinfeld
The Wanderers – The Wanderers
Jack Welker's crew – Breaking Bad
Westside Rollerz – Saints Row[9]
Wormsley Common Gang – "The Destructors
The Brotherhood
28.Alliance of Whites

Italian mafia[edit][edit]
Bonasera crime family – She Hate Me
Bonelli Crew – Grand Theft Auto V
Borgia crime family – Predator: Concrete Jungle
Cacuzza Crew – Sons of Anarchy
Castiglione crime family – The Executioner
Clemente crime family – Mafia II
Clericuzio crime family – The Last Don
The Commission – Grand Theft Auto IV
Ancelotti crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Gambetti crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Lupisella crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Messina crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Pavano crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Damiano crime family – Law & Order: Criminal Intent
D'Amico crime family – The Simpsons
DeBenedetto crime family – The Sopranos
DeMarco crime family – Max Payne 3
DiGeorge crime family – The Executioner
DiMeo crime family – The Sopranos
Altieri/Gervasi Crew – The Sopranos
Aprile/Cifaretto/Spatafore Crew – The Sopranos
Barese Crew – The Sopranos
Moltisanti Crew – The Sopranos
Junior Soprano/Baccalieri Crew – The Sopranos
Soprano/Gualtieri Crew – The Sopranos
DiMera family – Days of Our Lives
Drago crime family – The Godfather Returns
Falcone crime family – Mafia II
Five Families – The Godfather
Barzini crime family – The Godfather
Cuneo crime family – The Godfather
Corleone crime family – The Godfather
Stracci crime family – The Godfather
Tattaglia crime family – The Godfather
Forelli crime family – Grand Theft Auto III and Grand Theft Auto San Andreas
Forlenza crime family – The Godfather
Lakeville Road Boys – The Godfather
Frenchi crime family – The Executioner
39.Gravina crime family – Mafia II

Armenian mafia[edit]
Armenian Might – The Shield
Los Santos Armenian Mob – Grand Theft Auto V
Malakian clan – Le Premier Cercle
4.Tavanian crime family – One in the Chamber

Azerbaijani mafia[edit]
1.Oil Mafia – Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: Rogue Spear

Dixie Mafia and State Line Mob[edit]
Ritchie Doucet's Dixie Mafia – Mafia III
Gator Gang – Hitman: Blood Money
The Horsemen – Criminal Minds
Husser crime family – Claws
O'Neil Brothers – Grand Theft Auto V
The Rednecks – Grand Theft Auto 2
Southern Union – Mafia III
8.Trailer Park Mafia – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories

Georgian mafia[edit]
Ashvilli Gang – Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
2.Dvali crime family – Deus Ex: Manki

Greek mafia[edit]
Greek Antique Smugglers – CSI:NY
The Greeks – The Wire
3.Kiriakis family – Days of Our Lives

Haitian organized crime[edit]
1.Baka's Haitian Mob – Mafia III
2.Drifty's Hatian Gang – Power
3.Auntie Poulet's Haitian Gang – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
4.Les Serviteurs – Predator: Concrete Jungle
5.Sons of Samedi – Saints Row 2
6.The Zobops – Miami Vice
7.Vance crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories[8]

Hungarian mafia[edit]
Gogolak crime family – The Whole Nine Yards
2.Hungarian gang – The Usual Suspects



Indian mafia[edit]
Mr. Rhaman's Organization – Gangs of London
2.Sarkar's organization – Sarkar

Irish Mob[edit]
Breakaway IRA Faction – Criminal Minds
Bridge Street Gang – Oz
Brodie Gang – Mafia II
Burke crime family – Mafia III
Chicago South Club – Watch Dogs
Costello Gang – The Departed
Donnelly crime family – The Black Donnellys
Fitzpatrick crime family – Veronica Mars
Flannery crime family – State of Grace
Irish American Killers – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Kitchen Irish – Daredevil and The Punisher
Maguire family – Shameless
McReary crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
O'Hare family – Leverage
O'Mara crime family – Person of Interest
O'Neill Gang – Mafia II
Pogue Mahones – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Sullivan crime family – The Darknessiu
True Irish Republican Army (TIRA) – Sons of Anarchy
West Side Boys – Sleepers
21.Wilder crime family – CSI: NY

Jamaican posses and Yardies[edit]
Balseros Crew – Mercenaries 2: World in Flames
Brotherhood of Jah Army of Love – Grand Theft Auto
Clerkenwell Yardies – The Getaway
EC2 Crew – Gangs of London
Hillside Posse – Grand Theft Auto IV
KYC – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Desmond Maxwell's gang – Miami Vice
Screwface's woodoo gang – Marked for Death
Splash Posse – The Shield
Storm Posse – A Brief History of Seven Killings
Uptown Yardies – Grand Theft Auto III and Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories
12.Voodoo Posse – Predator 2

Jewish Mob[edit]
Lopez Cartel – Scarface
Roth Syndicate – The Godfather Part II
3.Isaac Roth's Jewish Mob – Grand Theft Auto IV


Korean mafia[edit]
9 Khan – Gang Related
Chang Syndicate – Outrage Coda
Choongshim Gang – Sweet, Savage Family
Goldmoon International – New World
Jaebum Clan - New World
Jang Syndicate – Lucy
Jingweon Mafia – Yakuza 2 and Yakuza 6
K-Town Killers – The Shield
Kampai Dragons – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Kim Gang – Dark Blue
Kim Syndicate – Street Kings
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lee Gang – Oldboy
Lee Syndicate – Dark Blue
Lim Gang – Collateral
Los Santos Kkangpae – Grand Theft Auto V
Midtown Gangsters – Grand Theft Auto IV
Wonsu Nodong – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Northmoon Clan – New World
Scissor Gang – My Wife Is a Gangster and My Wife is a Gangster 2
Shin Kkangpae – Power
White Tiger Gang – Marrying the Mafia II, Marrying the Mafia III and Marrying the 22.Mafia IV

Nicaraguan organized crime[edit]
The DL – Scorpion
Menendez Cartel – Call of Duty Black Ops II

Pakistani mafia[edit]
Talwar Sword Brothers (TSB) – Gangs of London

Romanian mafia[edit]
Ciupanezu's gang – Băieți buni
7.Negrea Gang – Wheelman


Russian mafia[edit]
Bulgarin crime syndicate – Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
Faustin/Rascalov Mafiya – Grand Theft Auto IV
Hotel Moscow – Black Lagoon
Janus Syndicate – GoldenEye
Kovski Bratva – Grand Theft Auto 2
Nezhinski crime family – We Own the Night
Petrovic crime syndicate – Grand Theft Auto IV
Putlova Bratva – Sons of Anarchy
9.San Andreas Bratva – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

Serbian mafia[edit]
Vladimir Janokvic's Serbian Gang – Power
Milan's criminal organization – Power
3.Jason Micic's Serbian Mob - Power

Spanish organized crime[edit]
Los Chulos Canallas – Wheelman
El "gang" del "Chicharrón" – Mort & Phil[10]
3.Los Lantos – Wheelman

Triads and Tongs[edit]
108 Dragons/Sons of the Dragons – Crying Freeman
18K Triad – Sleeping Dogs
54 Immortals – Call of Duty Black Ops III
Agni Kai Triad – The Legend of Korra
Auntie Shu Boys – Watch Dogs 2
Axe Gang – Kung Fu Hustle, Boxer From Shantung, Project A Part II, Drunken Master II, Once Upon a Time in Shanghai (2014 film), Shanghai Affairs, Marrying the Mafia II and Marrying the Mafia III
Bai-Lan – Burst Angel
Baoliusung Gang – Tenchu
Black Hand Triad – Akatsuki Blitzkampf
Black Tiger Gang – Rise of the Legend
Blood Feather Triad – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Blue Lotus Triad – Hitman: Codename 47
Blue Snake Syndicate – Cowboy Bebop
Char Siu Mafia – Nisekoi
Chang Sing Tong – Big Trouble in Little China
Chang Triad – War
Chen Long Tang – Darker Than Black
Chen Triad – Mayans M.C.
Chi You Men – Shenmue and Shenmue II
Chung Yee Gang – Blood Stained Tradewinds
Dragon Claw Triad – Stranglehold
Imperial Nines Triad (I9s) – Stranglehold
Dragon Skulls – The Mole Song: Hong Kong Capriccio
Dragon Triad – Psych
Empire Bay Tong – Mafia II
Fu Cang Long Triad – Rush Hour 2
Golden Dragon Association – Police Story 4: First Strike
Golden Kane Triad – Stranglehold
Golden Triad – Psych
Grant City Triad – Dead to Rights
Hatchets – Iron Fist
Hong Yiban Triad – Noir
Hun San Tong – Year of the Dragon
Hung Hing Triad – Young and Dangerous (film series), Triads: The Inside Story, The Secret Society – Boss and Century of the Dragon
Hung Pang Triad – Year of the Dragon
Inner Demons – Spider-Man
Jaoming crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Lee crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Lin Triad – Sons of Anarchy
Mountain Cloud Boys – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Ming crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Nam Soong Triad – Year of the Dragon
Northern Sea Gang – Rise of the Legend
Red Arrow – Deus Ex
Red Circle Triad – Nikita
Red Dragons – Dredd
Red Dragon Syndicate – Cowboy Bebop
Red Dragon Tong – The Terror of the Tongs
Saio Triad – Yakuza 6
San Luen Triad – Young and Dangerous
Shadow Tong – True Crime: New York City
Vice City Triad – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Wah Feng Triad – Police Story
Water Dragon Triad – Gangs of London
Wei Cheng Triad – Grand Theft Auto V
White Lotus Society – Necropolis
Söze Gang – The Usual Suspects
60.Vadideki Kurt – Waking the Dead

Turkish mafia[edit]
Council of the Wolves – Valley of the Wolves
Söze Gang – The Usual Suspects
3.Vadideki Kurt – Waking the Dead

Ukrainian mafia[edit]
Koshka Brotherhood – Dexter
2.Zakarov Syndicate – Stranglehold

Vietnamese gangs and Vietnamese mafias[edit]
Butterfly Children – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Da Nang Boys – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Flaming Dragon – Tropic Thunder
Shining Razors – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
5.Wolf Gang – Tracer

Yakuza[edit]
Ashura-kai - Shin Megami Tensei IV
Asuki Group – Durarara!!
Azai Corporation - G-Senjou no Maou
Anan Clan - Sonatine (1993 film)
Black Dragon - Nikolai Dante
Crazy 88 – Kill Bill
Danno Organization - Japan Organized Crime Boss
Date Family - Kikoku
Hachinosu-kai - The Mole Song: Undercover Agent Reiji
Haguro Family - Wolf Guy - Wolfen Crest
Hakushin Society – Crying Freeman
Hamayasu Family - Bloodstained Clan Honor
Hana-Gumi - Worst (manga)
Hanada Clan – Crying Freeman
Omi Alliance – Yakuza, Yakuza 2, Yakuza 3, Yakuza: Dead Souls and Yakuza 5
Go-Ryu Clan – Yakuza 2, Yakuza: Dead Souls and Yakuza 0
Sengoku Family – Yakuza 2
18.Takashima Clan – Yakuza 2

Drug cartels[edit]
Aquila Cartel – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Baja Diablo Cartel – The Shield
Barillo Cartel – Once Upon a Time in Mexico
Braga Cartel – Fast & Furious
Calderone Cartel - Miami Vice
Los Carnales – Saints Row[9]
The Cartel – Grand Theft Auto III
Caza Cartel - Graceland (TV series)
Cortez Cartel – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Culiacan Cartel – Hawaii Five-0
Delgado Cartel – Hitman: Blood Money
Diaz Cartel – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Eighty-Sevens – Dexter
Flaming Dragon – Tropic Thunder
Galindo Cartel – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans M.C.
Lobos Sonora Cartel – Sons of Anarchy
Loco Syndicate – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Lopez Cartel – Scarface
Lugo Cartel - Criminal Minds
Madrazo Cartel – Grand Theft Auto V
Magdalena Cartel – True Crime: New York City
Moreno Cartel - HITMAN™ 2
Morientes Cartel – Total Overdose
Los Muertos – Crackdown
Muerte Cartel – Total Overdose
Navarro Cartel - Ozark
Northwood Dominican Drug Cartel – Grand Theft Auto IV
Ochoa Cartel – Hitman: Codename 47
Orajuela Cartel – Saints Row
Revolutionary Armed Forces of Brazil (RAFB) – SOCOM II
Reynosa Cartel – NCIS
Torres Cartel – Grand Theft Auto IV
Velez Cartel – Law & Order SVU
Vice City Costa Ricans – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
36.Virgillo Cartel – Total Overdose

Motorcycle gangs[edit]
666ers M.C. - Hell Ride
The Angels – Grand Theft Auto
Angels of Death – Grand Theft Auto IV, Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars and Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned
Black Rebels – The Wild One
Black Widows – Every Which Way but Loose and Any Which Way You Can
The Bombers -- Streets of Fire
Born Losers – The Born Losers
Brigands – Brigands MC
The Brotherhood – Stone Cold
Calaveras – Sons of Anarchy
Chaplains – The Substitute
Copperheads – 1%
Crucifiers – The Cannonball Run
Crypt Kings - CSI:Miami
Dark Souls – Hochelaga
Death Knights – Law & Order: SVU
Del Fuegos – Wild Hogs
Devil's Advocates – Nam's Angels
Devil's Hand – Ride to Hell: Retribution
Devil's Kings – Bad Blood
Devil's Tribe – Sons of Anarchy
Flaming Windmills – Hitman: Codename 47 and Hitman: Contracts
The Front of Armament – Crows Zero
Gonads – Hardbodies
Grave Diggers – Stone
Grim Bastards – Sons of Anarchy
Grim Creepers – Eastbound and Down
Gunthugs – Grand Theft Auto IV
Heaven's Helpers – Saints Row 2
The Hellions - Torque (film)
The Horde – The Shield
Howlers – Goldstone
The Impalers - Dear God No!
Iron Bloods – Underbelly
Iron Chains – Lost Girl
Jackals – Beyond the Law
Jesters – Starsky & Hutch
Los Lobos – NYPD Blue
The Lost – Grand Theft Auto IV, Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned and Grand Theft Auto V[8]
The Lost Boys – The Lost Boys
Mad Angels – Shenmue
Madcaps – Angels From Hell and Hells Angels On Wheels
Los Matadores – The Last Chapter
Mayans – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans MC
Mongrel Motorcycle Club – Days Gone
Noblemen – The Gauntlet
One-eyed Snakes – Bob's Burgers
One Percenters – 21 Jump Street
Order of Odin – Silent Scream
Outcasts – Homefront
Renegades – Silent Scream
Satan's Disciples – My Mother Dreams the Satan's Disciples in New York
Sons of Anarchy – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans M.C.
Sons of Ragnarok – Watch Dogs 2
Southern Outlaws – Wicked Blood
Southside Serpents – Riverdale
Swole Boys – Mayans MC
Triple Sixers – The Last Chapter
Uptown Riders – Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned, Grand Theft Auto:
Vatos Malditos - Mayans MC
Vegas Blasters – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Victors M.C. - Hell Ride
White Stallionz – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
Wizards – Justified
67.Wolfpack – Headhunter

Pacific Islander[edit]
1.Base Town Tribe – Mayans M.C.
2.Crazy Horses – Boy

Prison Gangs
1.Aryan Sons – Miami Vice
2.Aryan Vanguard – Blood In Blood Out
3.Big House Crew – Sons of Anarchy
4.Black Nation – Sons of Anarchy
5.Black Rats Gang - Prison on Fire II
6.El Faziz Assassins – Undisputed
7.The Executioners – Wedlock
8.The Homeboys – Oz
9.The Legion – Manhunt 2
10.El Norte – Oz
11.La Onda – Blood In Blood Out
12.Powder Gangers – Fallout: New Vegas
13.The Smileys – Manhunt
14.SS Lowriders – Undisputed
15.White Nation – Blue Bloods
submitted by Noobmasternoobmaster to GTA5PC [link] [comments]


2020.02.18 06:01 Noobmasternoobmaster What do you think of this idea?

I know there will never be a mod that would make Los Santos as big as real life Los Angeles. But what if a map expansion was possible. And it could combine with other modes. two mods being the drug dealethug and the gang war mod. With a bigger city more gangs can be added. Think how insane it would be. With these gangs having gangs wars in a map expansion of Los Santos. Fighting over turf and drugs. Hear are the gangs ( Warring this is really really long)

African American
Barksdale Organization – The Wire
Black Viceroys – Watch Dogs[1]
The Bombers – Mafia II
The Brotherhood – Person of Interest[2]
Cash Money Brothers (CMB) – New Jack City[3]
East Holland Drug Crew – Grand Theft Auto IV
Golden Lords – Meteor Man[4]
Gramercy Riffs – The Warriors[5]
Hot Boyz – Gang Law
New Day Co-Op – The Wire
O'Day crime family – Romeo Must Die
One-Niners – The Shield and Sons of Anarchy[6]
Pope Partners, Inc. – Sons of Anarchy
Redding Organization – Oz
Sammy Robinson's Black Mob – Mafia III
The Bombers – Mafia II
The Six-Mile Syndicate – Warpath[3]
Stanfield Organization – The Wire
V-Dubs – Sucker Free City
Vice Kings – Saints Row[9]
32nd Street Blades – The Judge
The 580s – Watch Dogs 2
Ace Double Treys – Blue Bloods
Ballas – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto V
The Dragons – Family Matters
E-Park Johnnies – The Shield
East Dub – Sons of Anarchy
The Families – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto V
Farmtown 12 – The Shield
Fayette Street Mafia – The Wire
G-Park Lords - Chicago P.D.
Gramercy Riffs – The Warriors[5]
Headhunterz – Crime Life: Gang Wars
K2K – Saw
Lennox Avenue Boys (LA Boys) – New Jack City
Money Over Bitches (MOB) – Grand Theft Auto IV
Money Street Kings (MSK) – Blue Bloods
The Moonrunners – The Warriors[5]
North Holland Hustlers – Grand Theft Auto IV
Outlawz – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Southside Hoods – Grand Theft Auto III
Purple Nines – Grand Theft Auto III
Red Jacks – Grand Theft Auto III
Spookstreet Souljahs – The Shield
Unique Splitz – Blue Bloods
Uptown Assassins – Blue Bloods
Uptown Riders – Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned
V-Dubs – Sucker Free City
50.Van Cortlandt Rangers – The Warriors[5]

Hispanic
21st Street Gang – Colors
Altamira – Bright
Los Alvos – Lethal Weapon
Amigos – Adam-12
Los Angelicos – Gang Related
The Apostles – Miami Vice
Araña – Call of Juarez: The Cartel
Aztecs – The Shield
BX9 – Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Byzantine Latinos (Byz Lats) – The Shield, The Unit and Sons of Anarchy
Los Cabrones – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Cazadores – Castle
Cholos – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
Cobra Familia - CSI:Miami
Comando Sombra (C.S.) – Max Payne 3
Crazy Aces - CSI:NY
Curbside Gang – End of Watch
Diablos – Grand Theft Auto III
Los Diablos – Hill Street Blues
Dogwood Crew– Mayans M.C.
Eagle Rocks – Adam-12
East Harlem El Puño - CSI:NY
East Side Hermanos - CSI:Miami
East-Side Catorces - The Closer
Espinosa Gang – Breaking Bad
Farmtown Mijos – The Shield
Filhos De Ogum – Max Payne 3
La Fuerza – Snowfall
Hermanos Tainos – Power
Hillside Trece – Training Day
The Hurricanes – The Warriors[5]
The Innocentz – Manhunt
The Baby Faces – Manhunt
Malos – Manhunt
Muerte 187 – Manhunt
The Skullyz – Manhunt
Kappin' Off Suckers (KOS) – One Eight Seven
Latin Priests - Chicago P.D.
Los Locos – Short Circuit 2
Locotes Doces (L-12) – Law & Order
Los Lordes – Blue Bloods
Los Magnificos (Los Mags) – The Shield
Marabunta Grande – Grand Theft Auto V
Los Matadores – Predator: Concrete Jungle
Los Pozoleros – Blue Bloods
Los Profetas – The Shield
Peyote Kings - Dredd (2012 film)
San Fierro Rifa – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
El Salvadorans – The Shield
Sharks – West Side Story
Soldado Nation – Power
Southend Kings - NCIS:LA
Spanish Lords – Grand Theft Auto IV
Los Toros – The Shield
Torrucos – The Shield
Tezcas – Watch Dogs 2
Todos Locos – Power
Triple 2s – Sons of Anarchy
Tropa Z – Max Payne 3
Vagos – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Varrios Los Aztecas – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
La Vida Mala – NCIS
61.Webster Avenue Boys – Blue Bloods

Afrikaner organized crime[edit]
The Order – Soldier of Fortune
Van Hardenburg Syndicate – Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
3.Vorstedt Gang – Lethal Weapon 2

Albanian mafia[edit]
Albanian gang – Power
Marko Hoxha's trafficking ring – Taken
Petrela Gang – Grand Theft Auto IV
Sesseri Syndicate – SOCOM II
5.Vulaj Gang – Gangs of London

Asian[edit]
Avon Park Playboys – The Mentalist
Axe Gang – Kung Fu Hustle, Boxer From Shantung, Project A Part II, Drunken Master II, Once Upon a Time in Shanghai (2014 film), Shanghai Affairs, Marrying the Mafia II and Marrying the Mafia III
Black Dragon Mafia – Today You Die
Blue Squares – Durarara!!
Bushido – Need For Speed: Carbon
Chung Yee Gang - Blood Stained Tradewinds
Flying Dragons – Year of the Dragon
Fuk Ching Boys – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Fukienese Dragons – The Corrupter
Ghost Shadows – Year of the Dragon
Green Dragons – Revenge of the Green Dragons
The Heavens – Shenmue II
Hiragana Gang - NCIS:LA
K-Town Killers – The Shield
Kampai Dragons - CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lords of Death – Big Trouble in Little China
Poison Brothers – Shenmue II
Savage Huns – The Warriors[5]
The Red Dragons - Dredd (2012 film)
Tsoo - City of Heroes
Tung On Boys – Revenge of the Green Dragons
White Tigers – Revenge of the Green Dragons
The Wongs – The Wanderers
27.Yellow Scarves – Durarara!!
9 Khan – Gang Related
Chang Syndicate – Outrage Coda
Choongshim Gang – Sweet, Savage Family
Goldmoon International – New World
Jaebum Clan - New World
Jang Syndicate – Lucy
Jingweon Mafia – Yakuza 2 and Yakuza 6
Kim Gang – Dark Blue
Kim Syndicate – Street Kings
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lee Gang – Oldboy
Lee Syndicate – Dark Blue
Lim Gang – Collateral
Los Santos Kkangpae – Grand Theft Auto V
Midtown Gangsters – Grand Theft Auto IV
Wonsu Nodong – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Northmoon Clan – New World
Scissor Gang – My Wife Is a Gangster and My Wife is a Gangster 2
Shin Kkangpae – Power
White Tiger Gang – Marrying the Mafia II, Marrying the Mafia III and Marrying the 47.Mafia IV

White American
The Ghoulies – Riverdale
Green Street Elite (GSE) – Green Street
The Hi-Hats – The Warriors[5]
The Hoods – Manhunt
The Jets – West Side Story
Jones Street Boys – The Warriors[5]
Juvenite Pack-9 – Predator: Concrete Jungle
The Kings – Fallout: New Vegas
Liberty Republic – Martial Law
The Lords – Happy Days
Ministry of Sin – Soldier of Fortune
Nordics – Sons of Anarchy
Pogue Mahones – Crime Life: Gang Wars
The Punks – The Warriors[5]
The Red Kings – Manhunt 2
The Rogues – The Warriors[5]
The Shamrocks – Hill Street Blues
The Skinz – Manhunt
The Snakebacks - CSI:Crime Scene Investigation
Todd's Gang – Beavis and Butthead
Two-Threes - Chicago P.D.
Van Buren Boys – Seinfeld
The Wanderers – The Wanderers
Jack Welker's crew – Breaking Bad
Westside Rollerz – Saints Row[9]
Wormsley Common Gang – "The Destructors
The Brotherhood
28.Alliance of Whites

Italian mafia[edit][edit]
Bonasera crime family – She Hate Me
Bonelli Crew – Grand Theft Auto V
Borgia crime family – Predator: Concrete Jungle
Cacuzza Crew – Sons of Anarchy
Castiglione crime family – The Executioner
Clemente crime family – Mafia II
Clericuzio crime family – The Last Don
The Commission – Grand Theft Auto IV
Ancelotti crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Gambetti crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Lupisella crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Messina crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Pavano crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
Damiano crime family – Law & Order: Criminal Intent
D'Amico crime family – The Simpsons
DeBenedetto crime family – The Sopranos
DeMarco crime family – Max Payne 3
DiGeorge crime family – The Executioner
DiMeo crime family – The Sopranos
Altieri/Gervasi Crew – The Sopranos
Aprile/Cifaretto/Spatafore Crew – The Sopranos
Barese Crew – The Sopranos
Moltisanti Crew – The Sopranos
Junior Soprano/Baccalieri Crew – The Sopranos
Soprano/Gualtieri Crew – The Sopranos
DiMera family – Days of Our Lives
Drago crime family – The Godfather Returns
Falcone crime family – Mafia II
Five Families – The Godfather
Barzini crime family – The Godfather
Cuneo crime family – The Godfather
Corleone crime family – The Godfather
Stracci crime family – The Godfather
Tattaglia crime family – The Godfather
Forelli crime family – Grand Theft Auto III and Grand Theft Auto San Andreas
Forlenza crime family – The Godfather
Lakeville Road Boys – The Godfather
Frenchi crime family – The Executioner
39.Gravina crime family – Mafia II

Armenian mafia[edit]
Armenian Might – The Shield
Los Santos Armenian Mob – Grand Theft Auto V
Malakian clan – Le Premier Cercle
4.Tavanian crime family – One in the Chamber

Azerbaijani mafia[edit]
1.Oil Mafia – Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: Rogue Spear

Dixie Mafia and State Line Mob[edit]
Ritchie Doucet's Dixie Mafia – Mafia III
Gator Gang – Hitman: Blood Money
The Horsemen – Criminal Minds
Husser crime family – Claws
O'Neil Brothers – Grand Theft Auto V
The Rednecks – Grand Theft Auto 2
Southern Union – Mafia III
8.Trailer Park Mafia – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories

Georgian mafia[edit]
Ashvilli Gang – Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
2.Dvali crime family – Deus Ex: Manki

Greek mafia[edit]
Greek Antique Smugglers – CSI:NY
The Greeks – The Wire
3.Kiriakis family – Days of Our Lives

Haitian organized crime[edit]
1.Baka's Haitian Mob – Mafia III
2.Drifty's Hatian Gang – Power
3.Auntie Poulet's Haitian Gang – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
4.Les Serviteurs – Predator: Concrete Jungle
5.Sons of Samedi – Saints Row 2
6.The Zobops – Miami Vice
7.Vance crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories[8]

Hungarian mafia[edit]
Gogolak crime family – The Whole Nine Yards
2.Hungarian gang – The Usual Suspects



Indian mafia[edit]
Mr. Rhaman's Organization – Gangs of London
2.Sarkar's organization – Sarkar

Irish Mob[edit]
Breakaway IRA Faction – Criminal Minds
Bridge Street Gang – Oz
Brodie Gang – Mafia II
Burke crime family – Mafia III
Chicago South Club – Watch Dogs
Costello Gang – The Departed
Donnelly crime family – The Black Donnellys
Fitzpatrick crime family – Veronica Mars
Flannery crime family – State of Grace
Irish American Killers – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Kitchen Irish – Daredevil and The Punisher
Maguire family – Shameless
McReary crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV
O'Hare family – Leverage
O'Mara crime family – Person of Interest
O'Neill Gang – Mafia II
Pogue Mahones – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Sullivan crime family – The Darknessiu
True Irish Republican Army (TIRA) – Sons of Anarchy
West Side Boys – Sleepers
21.Wilder crime family – CSI: NY

Jamaican posses and Yardies[edit]
Balseros Crew – Mercenaries 2: World in Flames
Brotherhood of Jah Army of Love – Grand Theft Auto
Clerkenwell Yardies – The Getaway
EC2 Crew – Gangs of London
Hillside Posse – Grand Theft Auto IV
KYC – Crime Life: Gang Wars
Desmond Maxwell's gang – Miami Vice
Screwface's woodoo gang – Marked for Death
Splash Posse – The Shield
Storm Posse – A Brief History of Seven Killings
Uptown Yardies – Grand Theft Auto III and Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories
12.Voodoo Posse – Predator 2

Jewish Mob[edit]
Lopez Cartel – Scarface
Roth Syndicate – The Godfather Part II
3.Isaac Roth's Jewish Mob – Grand Theft Auto IV


Korean mafia[edit]
9 Khan – Gang Related
Chang Syndicate – Outrage Coda
Choongshim Gang – Sweet, Savage Family
Goldmoon International – New World
Jaebum Clan - New World
Jang Syndicate – Lucy
Jingweon Mafia – Yakuza 2 and Yakuza 6
K-Town Killers – The Shield
Kampai Dragons – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Kim Gang – Dark Blue
Kim Syndicate – Street Kings
Korean Power – Revenge of the Green Dragons
Lee Gang – Oldboy
Lee Syndicate – Dark Blue
Lim Gang – Collateral
Los Santos Kkangpae – Grand Theft Auto V
Midtown Gangsters – Grand Theft Auto IV
Wonsu Nodong – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Northmoon Clan – New World
Scissor Gang – My Wife Is a Gangster and My Wife is a Gangster 2
Shin Kkangpae – Power
White Tiger Gang – Marrying the Mafia II, Marrying the Mafia III and Marrying the 22.Mafia IV

Nicaraguan organized crime[edit]
The DL – Scorpion
Menendez Cartel – Call of Duty Black Ops II

Pakistani mafia[edit]
Talwar Sword Brothers (TSB) – Gangs of London

Romanian mafia[edit]
Ciupanezu's gang – Băieți buni
7.Negrea Gang – Wheelman


Russian mafia[edit]
Bulgarin crime syndicate – Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
Faustin/Rascalov Mafiya – Grand Theft Auto IV
Hotel Moscow – Black Lagoon
Janus Syndicate – GoldenEye
Kovski Bratva – Grand Theft Auto 2
Nezhinski crime family – We Own the Night
Petrovic crime syndicate – Grand Theft Auto IV
Putlova Bratva – Sons of Anarchy
9.San Andreas Bratva – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

Serbian mafia[edit]
Vladimir Janokvic's Serbian Gang – Power
Milan's criminal organization – Power
3.Jason Micic's Serbian Mob - Power

Spanish organized crime[edit]
Los Chulos Canallas – Wheelman
El "gang" del "Chicharrón" – Mort & Phil[10]
3.Los Lantos – Wheelman

Triads and Tongs[edit]
108 Dragons/Sons of the Dragons – Crying Freeman
18K Triad – Sleeping Dogs
54 Immortals – Call of Duty Black Ops III
Agni Kai Triad – The Legend of Korra
Auntie Shu Boys – Watch Dogs 2
Axe Gang – Kung Fu Hustle, Boxer From Shantung, Project A Part II, Drunken Master II, Once Upon a Time in Shanghai (2014 film), Shanghai Affairs, Marrying the Mafia II and Marrying the Mafia III
Bai-Lan – Burst Angel
Baoliusung Gang – Tenchu
Black Hand Triad – Akatsuki Blitzkampf
Black Tiger Gang – Rise of the Legend
Blood Feather Triad – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Blue Lotus Triad – Hitman: Codename 47
Blue Snake Syndicate – Cowboy Bebop
Char Siu Mafia – Nisekoi
Chang Sing Tong – Big Trouble in Little China
Chang Triad – War
Chen Long Tang – Darker Than Black
Chen Triad – Mayans M.C.
Chi You Men – Shenmue and Shenmue II
Chung Yee Gang – Blood Stained Tradewinds
Dragon Claw Triad – Stranglehold
Imperial Nines Triad (I9s) – Stranglehold
Dragon Skulls – The Mole Song: Hong Kong Capriccio
Dragon Triad – Psych
Empire Bay Tong – Mafia II
Fu Cang Long Triad – Rush Hour 2
Golden Dragon Association – Police Story 4: First Strike
Golden Kane Triad – Stranglehold
Golden Triad – Psych
Grant City Triad – Dead to Rights
Hatchets – Iron Fist
Hong Yiban Triad – Noir
Hun San Tong – Year of the Dragon
Hung Hing Triad – Young and Dangerous (film series), Triads: The Inside Story, The Secret Society – Boss and Century of the Dragon
Hung Pang Triad – Year of the Dragon
Inner Demons – Spider-Man
Jaoming crime family – Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Lee crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Lin Triad – Sons of Anarchy
Mountain Cloud Boys – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Ming crime family – Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Nam Soong Triad – Year of the Dragon
Northern Sea Gang – Rise of the Legend
Red Arrow – Deus Ex
Red Circle Triad – Nikita
Red Dragons – Dredd
Red Dragon Syndicate – Cowboy Bebop
Red Dragon Tong – The Terror of the Tongs
Saio Triad – Yakuza 6
San Luen Triad – Young and Dangerous
Shadow Tong – True Crime: New York City
Vice City Triad – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Wah Feng Triad – Police Story
Water Dragon Triad – Gangs of London
Wei Cheng Triad – Grand Theft Auto V
White Lotus Society – Necropolis
Söze Gang – The Usual Suspects
60.Vadideki Kurt – Waking the Dead

Turkish mafia[edit]
Council of the Wolves – Valley of the Wolves
Söze Gang – The Usual Suspects
3.Vadideki Kurt – Waking the Dead

Ukrainian mafia[edit]
Koshka Brotherhood – Dexter
2.Zakarov Syndicate – Stranglehold

Vietnamese gangs and Vietnamese mafias[edit]
Butterfly Children – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Da Nang Boys – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Flaming Dragon – Tropic Thunder
Shining Razors – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
5.Wolf Gang – Tracer

Yakuza[edit]
Ashura-kai - Shin Megami Tensei IV
Asuki Group – Durarara!!
Azai Corporation - G-Senjou no Maou
Anan Clan - Sonatine (1993 film)
Black Dragon - Nikolai Dante
Crazy 88 – Kill Bill
Danno Organization - Japan Organized Crime Boss
Date Family - Kikoku
Hachinosu-kai - The Mole Song: Undercover Agent Reiji
Haguro Family - Wolf Guy - Wolfen Crest
Hakushin Society – Crying Freeman
Hamayasu Family - Bloodstained Clan Honor
Hana-Gumi - Worst (manga)
Hanada Clan – Crying Freeman
Omi Alliance – Yakuza, Yakuza 2, Yakuza 3, Yakuza: Dead Souls and Yakuza 5
Go-Ryu Clan – Yakuza 2, Yakuza: Dead Souls and Yakuza 0
Sengoku Family – Yakuza 2
18.Takashima Clan – Yakuza 2

Drug cartels[edit]
Aquila Cartel – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Baja Diablo Cartel – The Shield
Barillo Cartel – Once Upon a Time in Mexico
Braga Cartel – Fast & Furious
Calderone Cartel - Miami Vice
Los Carnales – Saints Row[9]
The Cartel – Grand Theft Auto III
Caza Cartel - Graceland (TV series)
Cortez Cartel – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Culiacan Cartel – Hawaii Five-0
Delgado Cartel – Hitman: Blood Money
Diaz Cartel – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Eighty-Sevens – Dexter
Flaming Dragon – Tropic Thunder
Galindo Cartel – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans M.C.
Lobos Sonora Cartel – Sons of Anarchy
Loco Syndicate – Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Lopez Cartel – Scarface
Lugo Cartel - Criminal Minds
Madrazo Cartel – Grand Theft Auto V
Magdalena Cartel – True Crime: New York City
Moreno Cartel - HITMAN™ 2
Morientes Cartel – Total Overdose
Los Muertos – Crackdown
Muerte Cartel – Total Overdose
Navarro Cartel - Ozark
Northwood Dominican Drug Cartel – Grand Theft Auto IV
Ochoa Cartel – Hitman: Codename 47
Orajuela Cartel – Saints Row
Revolutionary Armed Forces of Brazil (RAFB) – SOCOM II
Reynosa Cartel – NCIS
Torres Cartel – Grand Theft Auto IV
Velez Cartel – Law & Order SVU
Vice City Costa Ricans – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
36.Virgillo Cartel – Total Overdose

Motorcycle gangs[edit]
666ers M.C. - Hell Ride
The Angels – Grand Theft Auto
Angels of Death – Grand Theft Auto IV, Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars and Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned
Black Rebels – The Wild One
Black Widows – Every Which Way but Loose and Any Which Way You Can
The Bombers -- Streets of Fire
Born Losers – The Born Losers
Brigands – Brigands MC
The Brotherhood – Stone Cold
Calaveras – Sons of Anarchy
Chaplains – The Substitute
Copperheads – 1%
Crucifiers – The Cannonball Run
Crypt Kings - CSI:Miami
Dark Souls – Hochelaga
Death Knights – Law & Order: SVU
Del Fuegos – Wild Hogs
Devil's Advocates – Nam's Angels
Devil's Hand – Ride to Hell: Retribution
Devil's Kings – Bad Blood
Devil's Tribe – Sons of Anarchy
Flaming Windmills – Hitman: Codename 47 and Hitman: Contracts
The Front of Armament – Crows Zero
Gonads – Hardbodies
Grave Diggers – Stone
Grim Bastards – Sons of Anarchy
Grim Creepers – Eastbound and Down
Gunthugs – Grand Theft Auto IV
Heaven's Helpers – Saints Row 2
The Hellions - Torque (film)
The Horde – The Shield
Howlers – Goldstone
The Impalers - Dear God No!
Iron Bloods – Underbelly
Iron Chains – Lost Girl
Jackals – Beyond the Law
Jesters – Starsky & Hutch
Los Lobos – NYPD Blue
The Lost – Grand Theft Auto IV, Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned and Grand Theft Auto V[8]
The Lost Boys – The Lost Boys
Mad Angels – Shenmue
Madcaps – Angels From Hell and Hells Angels On Wheels
Los Matadores – The Last Chapter
Mayans – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans MC
Mongrel Motorcycle Club – Days Gone
Noblemen – The Gauntlet
One-eyed Snakes – Bob's Burgers
One Percenters – 21 Jump Street
Order of Odin – Silent Scream
Outcasts – Homefront
Renegades – Silent Scream
Satan's Disciples – My Mother Dreams the Satan's Disciples in New York
Sons of Anarchy – Sons of Anarchy and Mayans M.C.
Sons of Ragnarok – Watch Dogs 2
Southern Outlaws – Wicked Blood
Southside Serpents – Riverdale
Swole Boys – Mayans MC
Triple Sixers – The Last Chapter
Uptown Riders – Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned, Grand Theft Auto:
Vatos Malditos - Mayans MC
Vegas Blasters – CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Victors M.C. - Hell Ride
White Stallionz – Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
Wizards – Justified
67.Wolfpack – Headhunter

Pacific Islander[edit]
1.Base Town Tribe – Mayans M.C.
2.Crazy Horses – Boy

Prison Gangs
1.Aryan Sons – Miami Vice
2.Aryan Vanguard – Blood In Blood Out
3.Big House Crew – Sons of Anarchy
4.Black Nation – Sons of Anarchy
5.Black Rats Gang - Prison on Fire II
6.El Faziz Assassins – Undisputed
7.The Executioners – Wedlock
8.The Homeboys – Oz
9.The Legion – Manhunt 2
10.El Norte – Oz
11.La Onda – Blood In Blood Out
12.Powder Gangers – Fallout: New Vegas
13.The Smileys – Manhunt
14.SS Lowriders – Undisputed
15.White Nation – Blue Bloods
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2019.09.06 03:20 Pickup_your_nuts Today In History 06/09














































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2019.09.02 14:26 JazzyFusion Black and gay. Out of options.

THIS IS NOT A HOOKUP POST. THIS IS A RANT POST.
I was born and raised, and live in Los Angeles. I'm black and gay and 28 years old, and I'm autistic and alone. My speaking voice is also high, and I have afro hair. I would like a boyfriend.
I don't like those stupid ass apps. I swipe on so many people, and they don't match with me back.
I have no family. (They disowned me.) So I can't rely on family to set me up with someone. I don't have any friends either.
Meetup is a useless site. I been on meetups, but nobody seemed interested in me. People were forming cliques.
I tried to sign up for this Speed Dating Event/Mixer, here in LA, and the company I later found out is a scam.
I made a post on r4r, and nobody cared at all.
My hobbies are not hobbies I'm attracted to in other men really or want to date over. I do writing, gymnastics, and hip hop dancing. I also collect vinyl records. (I was born in the 90s, and I like all types of music, but I love, LOVE, Disco and soul above all.) I'm a writer, (I write novels), but my boyfriend doesn't have to be a writer, and kinda prefer if he wasn't, because the literary community hates me. I was banned from so many writing subreddits because I'm so fierce lol.
I like guys that are more into stuff I wouldn't dream about being interested in. Like computer programming, auto mechanics, weightlifting, truck driving, outdoorstuff. I don't know.
I kinda like more rugged, and teddy bear like guys. Like Keemstar and Ethan from H3H3. I feel I'm living in some type of fantasy land because of my type, and I couldn't give a solitary fuck. I couldn't. Because I'm a gay feminine, Childish Gambino looking black guy.
I do volunteer sometimes, and help out the homeless too, but I don't volunteer to look for men. Sorry.
I don't like clubs/bars to meet people. I go there to have fun and chill, but every time I try to talk to a guy, they reject me.
I then ask guys out in the street, at the subway station, at events and stuff. They just reject me, and give me fake numbers and emails.
I'm left without any other options but to make a fool of myself. I was nice, I was patient, I was kind, but that game is over. Sorry.
I just want a boyfriend, and hate being fucking alone. What the fuck am I doing wrong?
What am I doing wrong? I'm out of options, and I don't know what to do.
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2018.12.11 15:44 CarlieScion 2018 Album of the Year #11: Hayley Kiyoko - Expectations

Pre-emptive P.S.: Remember to do the 2017 Pop/Rock Rate

Artist: Hayley Kiyoko
Album: Expectations
Tracklist and Lyrics: Genius
Release Date: March 30, 2018
Listen: Album Trailer Apple Music Spotify YouTube

Background

Hayley Kiyoko Alcroft was born on born April 3, 1991 and is in this day and age called Lesbian Jesus. I was born in 1997 and am in this day and age A Bisexual. The 90's literally invented wlw. In this essay I will...
So, most of y'all probably know something about Hayley Kiyoko. She's technically an ex-act, having starred in the 2011 Disney movie Lemonade Mouth and The Wizards of Waverly Place. You might also have seen her in the Scooby Do live-action movies, The Fosters or CSI: Cyber. She began her musical career in the girl group 'The Stunners' (where Tinashe was a fellow member). She released her first solo EP in 2013, titled A Belle to Remember.
However, she first began to see wider success with the EP This Side of Paradise, which featured the song Girls Like Girls. Hayley is an out-and-proud lesbian, and the music video for that track went somewhat viral on Tumblr and Youtube. The self-directed MV perfectly captures the thin line a lot of girls thread when they realize they like girls - "am I actually in love with my best friend?" The chemistry between the lead actors in this is insane, and if you haven't watched, go do it now! After this, she released the 2016 EP Citrine, where the lead single Gravel To Tempo also went somewhat viral, thanks to the (yet again) self-directed music video and a certain Headphone Girl.
2018 has been a good year for Hayley - she released Expectations and have now won the Billboard Women in Music Rising Star award. This award has previously been given to popheads favorites such as Ariana Grande, Carly Rae Jepsen, Janelle Monáe and popheads non-favorites such as Halsey. But enough about other artists, let's take a deeper look at my AOTY.

Album Review

There's apparently a theme for wlw in 2018 - naming their debut tracks/albums Expectations. But why did Hayley choose this name for her album? She says it's because expectations are both the best and the worst part of herself - she has high expectations to both herself and others, which often comes back to bite her in the ass.
She's also said that she thinks Expectations is an album best listened to from start to finish, which i definetly agree with. The interludes only makes sense in album context, and the transitions from for example Feelings into What I Need are good enough to warrant a full album listen through.
The album deals with themes of love (Wanna Be Missed) - especially being in love with girls who aren't ready to love you back (Curious, HNLY and What I Need), fame (Palm Dreams and Under The Blue/Take Me In), physical and mental illness (Mercy/Gatekeeper) and the loss of a loved one (Molecules). Hayley has said that every track on the album is like a little piece of her history, which is why there are so many different themes covered.
Expectations feels very organic, much like Hayley's last two EPs. Both song-writing and production feels like it wasn't put together by a big team in a studio - which is both good and bad. It feels like a clear picture of Hayley and who she wants to be, but there are also a few kinks that makes the album feel more raw - like Hayley's delivery on some of the songs (for example, singing "Sorry that I care", while sounding like she... doesn't care at all).
Instrumentally the album is very dreamy and summery. There are lots of drums and at some points, especially vulnerable moments, there are guitars. The album sounds like Los Angeles. Sometimes Hayley experiments with the production, like on Mercy/Gatekeeper, where it switches between a soft melody and almost satanic chanting on Gatekeeper. It's also important to note that Hayley's voice is very husky and smokey, which makes the album seem more raw and organic too - her voice isn't perfect but it is rather unique.
I couldn't possibly write about all the tracks on this album, because I kinda want to write full-page essays about all of them. So here are a select few I wanted to talk a bit deeper about.

Some Track Reviews I Felt Like Doing

Expectations (Overture)

The opening track on Expectations is also the title track. This interlude begins with silence, before waves and the wind can be heard. From that, the track turns darker and messier in its instrumental. It's a prelude to the melody and production used in Gatekeeper. The only line Hayley sings is the barely audible "Yeah, I know you wanna...", but it cuts off before we get to know what it is Hayley thinks her partner wants to do. It's a reflection of the relationship story that will be told throughout this album - it's unfinished. It also beings the theme of being the object of affection for somebody who can't or won't act fully on it.

What I Need ft. Kehlani

First of all, the transition from Feelings into this is heavenly. This bittersweet duet with Kehlani is about being with a girl who isn't ready to admit their sexuality. Honestly, this song is a 10/10, simply because of the chemistry between Hayley and Kehlani. This has been compared to Strangers by Halsey and Lauren Jauregui, simply for being a pop duet between two queer girls. Strangers, however, is about the natural end to a relationship when you can't even recognize the person you're with anymore. This song is about not being able to even start a relationship, because - as Hayley sings "I only want a girl who ain't afraid to love me // Not a metaphor of what we really could be". Hayley wants a true relationship, someone she can be with publicly.

Sleepover

Sleepover is the softest track on Expectations. It's about that longing, soul-crushing feeling a lot of gay girls have when they start developing crushes on their straight best friends. This is pretty much the 'Girls Like Girls' MV in song form. It's not a "lolz i was friendzoned" kinda song, it's much more Delicate (isn't it, isn't it) than that. It's about taking solace in knowing this person closely, even if it hurts to not have them in a romantic way.

Mercy/Gatekeeper

There usually isn't songs about illnesses on pop albums, but Hayley is serving us a little bit of every part of her life. The first of two double feature songs, Mercy/Gatekeeper started as a poem. Hayley got a concussion on her 25th birthday and has struggled with Post-Concussion Syndrome (PCS) ever since. It gave her headaches and made her depressed. Mercy is calming instrumentally, but the lyrics deal with the physical pain she's feeling. Gatekeeper sounds much darker, but is actually about her trying to take control of herself again. It ends on both a hopeful and depressing lyric "Don't let me die / With my soul in the air // Don't let me die /When there's nobody here"

Curious

This wasn't the lead single, but this is THE single. This is the closest Hayley has come to breaking out in the mainstream, even performing the song with Taylor Swift at Gillette Stadium - truly a 20gayteen Moment™. Most notable for the fast-sung line "didyoutakehimtothepierinsantamonicaforgettobringajacketwrapupinhimcauseyouwantedto?", this song is about the same relationship from What I Need. While What I Need explains why the two lovers didn't work out, this track centers around Hayley obsessing over her lost lover's new relationship. The chorus ends in a two-punch of a line - "I'm just curious // Is it serious?". Hayley is asking her previous lover if her new relationship is serious, but she's also asking if their feelings for each other is serious - serious enough for her to act on them.

He'll Never Love You

This song is about the same situations as Curious and What I Need - Hayley being with a girl who isn't ready to be out. This is the only song on the album that is literally just what happened, according to Hayley. She sat down, wrote what happened and how she felt about the situation. It sounds kinda salty and mocking, but in a fun way. Hayley's having fun teasing this girl, knowing that she actually wants to be with her, rather than her boyfriend. It can be constructed as #problematic, but I think this is just Hayley venting her frustration about wanting a girl who isn't ready to want you back, even though she's aware of her feelings.

Molecules

This song was inspired by something rather tragic. The brother of one of Hayley's friends was murdered. She said the whole situation felt so pointless and hopeless. At the memorial, somebody recited a poem with the lines "he’s not gone, [it's] just that his molecules have rearranged". You can feel Hayley's pain when she's singing "I've lost you" - but it also sounds like she's singing "I've lost truth".

Let It Be

This is a cleansing song. It begins with quiet ocean waves, before the drums kick in. It's one of the softest songs on the album, building up its speed throughout. It culminates in the line "it's killing me cause we're at the end", before it goes back into a soft guitar riff. While it's actually about a break-up, this theme of letting things go really goes for all the themes discussed on the album - you can't change the past, your experiences or another person. You just have to let it be, and move on. Hayley summed it up pretty well in this instagram post: "Let It Be is about accepting the bravery to move on, and start a new beginning, even if it’s hard"

I Want To Know What You Think!

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2018.05.09 03:01 subsummary LA Related Subs (02-May - 09-May Edition)

I've combed through many of our LA related subreddits, and these are the top posts from this week:
Hi, I'm a bot. Thankfully, I'm not AutoModerator. My job is just to gather some of the best posts from our neighbors. The intention is to create awareness of the speciality subs that relate to LosAngeles. If you have a suggestion about what other subreddits that I should check out or feedback, please send use the message moderators link on the sidebar.
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2018.05.04 05:03 Megan_Dawn R/FANTASY'S TOP LGBTQA+ BOOKS LIST VOTING RESULTS

Call in the inspectors to check the structural integrity of your tbr piles folks, because they’re about to get a lot bigger.
23 VOTES
The Traitor Baru Cormorant by Seth Dickinson Lesbian
The perfect book for people who enjoy the feeling of having their heart put through a shredder, sticky-taped back together and then put through again.
21 VOTES
the Inda series by Sherwood Smith Gay & bisexual
If you can make it through the initial onslaught of ‘what the fuck is going on who the hell even is that person again’ you will be rewarded.
18 VOTES
the World of Riverside series by Ellen Kushner Gay & bisexual
Witty conversations, tea parties and sword fights.
17 VOTES
The Long Way To A Small Angry Planet by Becky Chambers Lesbian
Oh, are you feeling down? Then please, allow this book to PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE WITH JOY AND PUPPIES AND THE INHERANT GOODNESS INSIDE OF US ALL.
14 VOTES
The Shadow Campaigns by Django Wexler Lesbian
Cool musket battles, lots of strategizing, x-men style abilities, and on top of all that interesting characters with engaging arcs to follow.
13 VOTES
Phèdre's Trilogy Bisexual
Not nearly as much sex as everyone makes out, and twice as much action and fun political twistiness.
10 VOTES
the Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater Gay & bisexual
Four teenagers in Virginia are hunting for a buried Welsh King, but who cares about Welsh Kings when there are FEELINGS that need to be EXPLORED. (Infinitely better than it’s blurb makes it sound).
The Craft Sequence by Max Gladstone Lesbian & Trans
Necromancer-attorneys. What more do you need?
9 VOTES
the Shattered Sigil trilogy by Courtney Schafer Bisexual
Hey, Dev, you know how it’s totes illegal to smuggle anything magic across the border? Like, meet Mr. Noose kind of illegal? Well, uh, this is Kiran. Just a totally normal dude, definitely not a mage of any kind, no sir, just a dude who needs you to help him through the mountains and across the border. Ok? Cool. Maximum rock-climbing fun meets maximum blood magic meets maximum read it now.
The Rains Wilds Chronicles by Robin Hobb Gay
You really should read the nine books that come before this series. To help everything make sense and also because they’re fantastic. (And also because I technically couldn’t include the Fool in this list but he totally belongs here).
8 VOTES
Carry On by Rainbow Rowell Gay
Do you like magic schools? Do you especially like Harry Potter flavoured magic schools? Then you will love Carry On. No, really, there’ve been studies. You’ll love it. And if you ever enjoyed Harry/Draco fanfic you’ll love it harder.
Machinations of Empire trilogy by Yoon Ha Lee Lesbian, gay & trans
Oh shit guys, one of our space fortresses is totes rebelling. Look, they’re even trying to implement their own calendar to subvert the magic calendar-based science we use to launch devastating attacks! What should we do? Hmm, let’s take this promising soldier and force her to share her body with the resurrected spirit of the brilliant and genocidal general we’ve had locked up for a few centuries. Flawless plan.
the Nightrunner series by Lynn Flewelling Gay
Painfully sweet young Alec is plucked from a dungeon by the mysterious and dashing elf, Seragol. He’s basically a spy for the queen and he’s all, ‘hey you’re cute wanna come be my spy apprentice?’ Adventures ensue.
7 VOTES
Six of Crows by Liegh Bardugo Gay
It’s heist time, boys and girls! Kaz Brekker is putting together a team for a job that could set them all up for life. So many tragic backstory, so many betrayal, so many sexual tension. The author's skill and some really cool heisty twists keep this book mostly melodrama free. Mostly.
Wayward Children series by Seanan McGuire Pansexual
Ever wondered what happened to all the kids who get transported to magical worlds and then spat back out to earth when the adventure is done? “I really enjoyed the mix of very atypical characters, the modern setting portal fantasy to a wide variety of locales, the just slightly hard edge of kids that are figuring out how to be adults with too much freedom a bit like The Magicians.” – u/leftoverbrine
A Taste of Honey by Kai Ashante Wilson Bisexual
Prose so beautiful you’ll want to weep. And if the prose doesn’t get you the ending will. To discuss the plot would be to ruin it; I recommend going in blind.
Sufficiently Advanced Magic by Andrew Rowe Asexual
“In the world of Sufficiently Advanced Magic, anyone can become an "attuned" by proving themselves worthy in one of the seven enormous towers spread across the continent. All you have to is not die, which is kind of hard when there's mysteriously deadly puzzles and hordes of monsters waiting for you in the towers.” – u/CoffeeArchives
6 VOTES
A Land Fit For Heroes trilogy by Richard K. Morgan Gay & lesbian
A few decades after enemy nations had to band together to fight an invasion of lizard-monster people (yep), three war-comrades are trying to figure out where they belong. Extremely graphic (I’m talking blood and sex here). Also, Ravensfriend is the coolest sword in the whole genre and that’s a hill I will die on.
5 VOTES
A Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzie Lee Bisexual
I mean let’s be honest here, this is more of a historical novel with faint fantasy elements. But faintly fantasy still gets it onto our esteemed list! And good thing too, because this book is oodles of fun and being inside Monty’s head is a blast.
The Stone Dance of the Chameleon trilogy by Ricardo Pinto Gay
Blood purity is so important in Osrakum that the noble class get tattooed with the percentage of “pure” blood they have, down to like the nineteenth decimal, and they rule like cruel gods over those with lower numbers. Beautiful, but also super dark. Protagonist Carnelian’s inherent goodness only makes this darkness more stark.
4 VOTES
the Doctrine of Labyrinths trilogy by Sarah Monnette Gay
Felix is a court wizard and Mildmay is a thief. But, surprise! Turns out they’re brothers. And, surprise! Turns out Felix has just been framed for a heinous crime and cursed with insanity so he can’t prove his innocence. The brothers go on the run, which, given Felix and the whole insane thing, gets pretty interesting. So much cool worldbuilding, which makes sense because (surprise!) Sarah Monette also writes as Katherine Addison.
the Collaborator series by Krista D. Ball Bisexual
“Recommended for: people who like espionage, political thrillers, or spy games. Also good for those who like space opera. A good choice for those who prefer the protagonist to behave less like a hero and more like someone just trying to stay alive.” – u/wishforagiraffe
Wake of Vultures by Lila Bowen Trans
After killing a monster Nettie can suddenly see monsters everywhere, and then some ghost-lady shows up and sends her on a quest across the desert to kill a baby-stealing evil bird thing. Nettie has such a unique voice, and an emotional quest that is just as gripping at the evil baby-stealing bird killing quest.
A Court Of Broken Knives by Anna Smith Spark Gay
“In The Court of Broken Knives, Spark’s literary voice is so strong and distinct that it’s almost a character in its own right. This prose is the prose of literary fiction, and personally I found it to be a daring move on Spark’s part and exciting change from the usual fare… Overall, this was a grimdark novel that read very differently than most – I found that I appreciated the lack of overly detailed descriptions of unnecessary violence that can sometimes be a hallmark of the subgenre.” – u/BookWol
Amberlough by Lara Elena Donnelly Gay s
I won’t lie to you all, this book gets off to a slow start. Just stick with it, appreciate Donnelly’s almost supernatural gift for description, and you will be rewarded. Cabaret meets Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. It’s a book about the insidious encroach of fascism. It’s a love story about two not exactly good men, who are not elevated by their love but rather drag it down into their selfish, self-preserving, ruthless world.
the Tamir Triad by Lynn Flewelling This one is a little complicated, but we’ll say Trans.
“At birth, the female Tamir is disguised by spell to appear male, to protect her from a powerful relative intent on killing any female children of royal blood. She grows up believing herself to be a boy (and feeling not quite right in her skin), only to learn the truth at puberty… The gothic tone helps put a unique stamp on a classic storyline where Tamir must fulfill a prophecy and take the throne.” – u/CourtneySchafer
the Imperial Radch trilogy by Anne Leckie Asexual
Breq was once a ship’s AI who could spread her consciousness across countless bodies, but now she’s just one woman. But that’s not gonna stop her from doing her best to tear. The. Motherfucking. System. Down.
Santa Olivia by Jacqueline Carey Lesbian
Loup Garron father was a genetically engineered soldier on the run from the government, and she inherited some cool stuff from him, like super strength, speed and an inability to feel fear. Skills she uses to become a vigilante superhero and also to win boxing matches. So much boxing in this book. So much.
the Tensorate series by JY Yang Trans & non-binary
“If you’ve ever watched a really good anime, and thought, well damn, this would be so awesome as a fantasy book, put everything down and pick these books up. Whisk yourself off to JY Yang’s Asian-inspired, silkpunk fantasy world in the Tensorate Series: the twin novellas Black Tides of Heaven and Red Threads of Fortune follow the individual lives of twins Sanao Akeha and Mokoya, children of the autocratic Protector in Yang’s world, and their battle for agency in lives lived as pawns in a greater, rotten game.” -u/DharjeelingTee
the Dreamblood duology by NK Jemisin Gay
“In the ancient city-state of Gujaareh, peace is the only law. Upon its rooftops and among the shadows of its cobbled streets wait the Gatherers - the keepers of this peace. Priests of the dream-goddess, their duty is to harvest the magic of the sleeping mind and use it to heal, soothe...and kill those judged corrupt.” – goodreads.com
Iron Council by China Mieville Gay & bisexual
Technically the last of Mieville’s Bas Lag books, but perfectly able to be read as a standalone. Judah Low, becomes (or is possibly possessed by?) a saint. He joins a group of railway workers as they steal a train (as you do) and flee with it across the wild and dangerous countryside. They are the Iron Council and exist as little more than legend, except now Judah is bringing them back. Very weird, but it’s Mieville, so… Duh?
The Devourers by Indra Das Gay
“This is your book if you are yearning for more classical werewolves where they are bloodthirsty and dangerous rather than the misunderstood paranormal monsters trope. The Devourers doesn’t read at all like a classical werewolf story, though. It has a primal, raw feeling to it. There’s lots of blood, meat, gore, piss, and sex.” – u/keshanu
Valdemar: The Last Herald-Mage series by Mercedes Lackey Gay
The reviews have promised me two things here: gayness and melodrama. So much gay, so much melodrama. Just when you think there couldn’t be more gay there’s more melodrama and then more gay and then more melodrama. It’s making me really want to read it, to be honest. So this dude Vanyal just really wants to be a bard, but his dad is all ‘nah, go learn to be a warier,’ but then it turns out he’ll be neither because he is a super powerful mage? Also psychic horses? I’m onboard.
The Balance Academy duology by SE Robertson Bisexual
All the folks I see around here lamenting the lack of slice of life fantasy, this looks like exactly that I plan to gobble it up as soon as I can.
Captive Prince trilogy by CS Pacat Bisexual
The second book of this trilogy, Prince’s Gambit, is one of the best books I have read in my entire life. I was literally on the edge of my seat and not in the clichéd saying kind of way but in a literal half my arse wasn’t even on the chair anymore kind of way. So. Freaking. Good. Book One has some tough stuff to get through but it’s worth it.
The Winged Histories by Sofia Samatar Lesbian
“[Samatar’s] turn of phrase is highly poetic and descriptive, and immerses the reader in her world… It's the compiled written works of four different women, each writing from their own perspective about a rebellion, with their unique insights. Each speaks about the different roles they played in the war's onset and conclusion. All four women are very intense characters. None have lived lightly, and the stories they tell of their lives reflects this.” – u/CarolinaCM
3 VOTES
The Vintner’s Luck by Elizabeth Knox Bisexual
On a summer’s evening in 1808 Sobran happens upon Xas, an angel, and with all the arrogance of youth decides Xas must have been sent to council him. Xas agrees to return, same place, date and time, every year for the rest of Sobran’s life. A lot happens. (war! A serial killer! Shit look out here comes Lucifer and homeboy looks pissssed!) But on the other hand it’s simply Sobran and Xas and the complicated relationship that grows between them.
Havemercy by Jaida Jones and Danielle Bennett Gay
See, this is why I did this list in the first place. To discover books I’d never even heard of before that sound so incredibly cool. Mechanical, magic fuelled dragons? A renegade ace? The last days of a century long war? Four unlikely heroes who need to rise up to make sure victory falls the right way? Multiple reviewers comparing it to Sarah Monnette? Uh, yes please. Yes. Please.
Karen Memory by Elizabeth Bear Lesbian
“Karen Memery [is] a prostitute working in a higher-end bordello in Rapid City… "Karen" has a very relatable, if a bit folksy, type of narrative voice but it does move the story along well… The girls in the Hotel Mon Cherie loved reading dime adventure novels to each other when business was slow, and that's the feeling I got from reading this book. It was a lot of fun!” – u/Tigrari
A Practical Guide to Evil by ErraticErrata Bisexual
“Tropes become law and cultures are split into Good and Evil. People who take important roles in their culture become Named and are bestowed with greater strength, speed and agility. The stuff of heroes and villains, protagonists and antagonists… Catherine Foundling, a Callowan orphan, becomes the Squire (Named) to the Black Knight, the second in command to the Dread Empress Malicia.” – u/Nihilvin
An Accident of Stars by Foz Meadows Lesbian
“After another bad day at school, Saffron Coulter follows a strange teacher through a magical world and winds up in another world in the middle of political strife erupting in two different nations. I really liked how Meadows subverted the chosen one trope by having all large amount of the political trouble caused by another world walker, the strange teacher named Gwen, having put the wrong man on the throne.” – u/thequeensownfool
The Armoured Saint by Myke Cole Lesbian
“This was a book that I had to read from the moment I read the blurb. It's a story about a girl from a land that is ruled/protected/terrorized by an Inquisition-like order of religious fanatics, who have the mission of finding and killing anyone who is or who might be a wizard… Because wizards draw their power from hell, and inevitably they will open a portal by which a devil can enter the world. They are corrupt, they are cruel ... but that doesn't mean they are wrong.” – u/MikeOfThePalace
The Course of Honour by Avoliot Gay
The quality of this this free (FREE) online novel is astounding; I would have paid for it without blinking. Jainan is representing his home planet in a diplomatic marriage to an abusive Prince. When the Prince dies (yay!) his rakish, scandal-prone cousin Kiem has to marry Jainan to salvage the treaty. Misunderstandings and conspiracies and romance abound!
The Bel Dame Apocrypha by Kameron Hurley Bisexual
Excellent writing. Hurley has a way with weaving a story where I kept wanting to read on and felt empathy with her characters throughout. Hurley...ah...does not treat her characters nicely. At any point. Interesting in that she is able to make the sheer violence and total non-morality come together. And the bugs. Oh, lord - the bugs. – u/elquesogrande
Ethan of Athos by Lois McMaster Bujold Gay
This addition to the Vorkosigana saga stands alone. Athos is a planet of men, where reproduction is handled by technology and you can live your whole life never seeing a woman. Unless the technology breaks, then like poor Ethan you might have to venture out into the world and get tangled up with a lady space pirate in order to fix it.
Huntress by Malinda Lo Lesbian
When nature gets all unbalanced an oracle decrees that two seventeen-year-olds need to go on a quest to fix it. Goodreads promises strong Chinese influences, which intrigues me, as well as the ominous line; “But the Kingdom needs only one huntress to save it…”
Palimpsest by Catherynne M. Valente Gay, lesbian, bisexual s
A portal fantasy wherein a magical city can only be reached via sex, like a city shaped STD. “Is a city alive? Well, what is a city in the first place? Are words on a page a city if they spring to life in the reader's imagination? Is a person a city that hosts cells, bacteria, organs, etc? Can four people make up a thriving metropolis? Palimpsest would seem to suggest so. The city is alive because the people are alive.” – u/Kopratic
Too Like The Lightning by Ada Palmer Gay
In the 25th century if you commit a crime you have to wander the world helping any one who asks for it. “It's just so...different to literally everything I've read. It's a historical recounting. It's a political thriller. It's a murder mystery. It's a bit of everything, and yet it's not.” – u/The_Real_JS
The Books of the Raksura by Martha Wells Bisexual
Moon is such a fantastic protagonist. He thinks he’s the only one of his kind, until he stumbles upon others and finds out he’s basically royalty but he’s so broken and his abandonment issues are like, what’s deeper than bone? Because they’re deeper than bone-deep. Plus, turns out his people are super matriarchal and Moon doesn’t know what to do with that. Everyone expects him to be a delicate flower and he’s constantly gutting enormous monsters with his claws and shit.
The One Who Eats Monsters by Casey Matthews Lesbian
Long ago, before history broke in half, elder gods exiled the vengeful deity Erynis to a far corner of Earth. When Ryn is found weakened after saving the life of an innocent villager, the U.S. military mistakes the battered immortal for a feral teenager and places her in New Petersburg, a decaying city full of monsters. – goodreads.com
In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan Bisexual
“An often hilarious look over the wall that not everyone can see, into magic lands where elves, dwarves, mermaids, harpies, trolls, and others live not in peace… Don’t come to this book looking for Tolkienesque worldbuilding; this is more of a character book, slyly but charmingly and generously and affectionately examining and often turning inside-out all those familiar portal fantasy tropes, while the central focus is firmly on character.” – u/SherwoodSmith
The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley Gay
“This is a tale that unfolds with the ticking precision of a fine timepiece. It doesn't hurry and it doesn't compromise. It definitely conveyed to me a feeling of a different time and a slightly different world… In a sense, it could be categorized as steampunk, though I think Clockwork suits it admirably. It's a read to be savored rather than rushed through. I liked her characterizations especially. I felt she didn't require me to like all of her characters, but presented them as they were and let me pass my own judgements upon them.” - u/RobinHobb
2 VOTES
Everfair by Nisi Shawl Lesbian
A steampunk alternate history set in the Belgian Congo under the horrifying regime of Leopold II, only in this version a group of optimistic folks purchase a heap of land from the evil nose-wipe and try to establish a utopia.
The Prisoners of Peace series by Erin Bow Bisexual
The world is ruled by an AI, and to keep all the nations in-line he takes royal children hostage until they hit 18. I always love a book with no bad guys, just people (and artificial intelligences) of varying degrees of awfulness doing things of varying degrees of awfulness in the name of a greater good. Also the scene with Greta and the apple press is intense as fuck.
Banner of the Damned by Sherwood Smith Asexual
“This book stands on its own apart from the main Inda quartet, 400 years after those events. However, we're going to be learning about how time changes stories such as the legend of Elgar the Fox, and much more about Norsunder. So themes continue through, even though it's all new characters.” – u/wishforagiraffe
Daughter of Mystery by Heather Rose Jones Lesbian
“This is a delightful, historical romance, fantasy of manners set in an imaginary european country. Margerit Sovitre didn’t expect to inherit her godfather's fortune, much less his bodyguard, Barbara the famed female duelist… Interestingly, the magic isn’t the usual high fantasy type of witches, wizards and court mages, but is of the saintly and alchemical variety.” – u/thequeensownfool
The Worldbreaker Saga by Kameron Hurley Lesbian & bisexual
“There is so much to love in this book. It shows issues of slavery and war. The world has a deep history and the ability to be cruel. Oh, and the mirror worlds. Worlds that are the result of the butterfly effect, essentially. Little differences here and there resulting in a different history and a different world. It’s just fascinating.” – u/LittlePlasticCastle
The Book of All Hours Duet by Hal Duncan Gay
The reviews of these two books swing wildly back and forth between “amazing genius” and “pretentiously unreadable.” There is a plot here – and a cool one at that; someone is trying to steal the book of all hours, written by angels on the skin of angels, which might lead to a holy war. It’s up to the reader though to piece this plot together, and Duncan doesn’t make it easy.
The Fire’s Stone by Tanya Huff Bisexual
Aaron, Darvish, Chandra—three strangers whose fates are about to become interwined. For someone has stolen The Stone, the magical talisman which stands between Ischia and the volcano's wrath. And unless the three can learn to work together on a quest to find the Stone, Ischia will drown in a sea of lava.
The Enchantment Emporium by Tanya Huff Bisexual
Interdimensional dragons, magic pies, soooo much incest. This book is unabashedly weird, but so damn charming that you don’t even notice unless you stop and really think about it. Alysha Gale escapes the watchful eyes of her powerful Aunties and takes over her Gran’s magic doodad shop in Calgary, hijinks ensue.
An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon Queer
“An Unkindness of Ghosts is one of those books that stays with you, haunts you a little bit, long after you’re done reading it. The story is set aboard the HSS Matilda, a spaceship that has been carrying tens of thousands of people from a now uninhabitable planet Earth towards a mythical Promised Land for three centuries.” – u/Sharadee
Prince’s Game series by MCA Hogarth Bisexual
The enlightened Alliance stands against the cruel and conquering Chatcaavan Empire. After twelve ambassadors were driven mad by their time with the Chatcaavan, (those who lived anyway) Lisinthir is determined not just to survive the Chatcaavans but to redeem them. The setting is one of the darkest I've ever encountered, but it’s balanced by Lisinthir. He changes a lot, but the core of his beliefs hold firm. It's something for the reader to hold on to when things go from dark to really, really dark.
The Salt Roads by Nalo Hopkinson Lesbian and bisexual s
“The Salt Roads transports readers across centuries and civilizations as it fearlessly explores the relationships women have with their lovers, their people, and the divine. Jeanne Duval, the ginger-colored entertainer, struggles with her lover poet Charles Baudelaire...Mer, plantation slave and doctor, both hungers for and dreads liberation...and Thais, a dark-skinned beauty from Alexandria, is impelled to seek a glorious revelation-as Ezili, a being born of hope, unites them all.” – goodreads.com
The Lightning-Struck heart by TJ Klune Gay
This book is ridiculous and fun and will make your face hurt from all the grinning and then when you least suspect it BAM it punches you in the heart. So sneaky. When Prince Justin becomes King, Sam will be his wizard. Even though Justin is a jerk and is dating Knight Commander Ryan, who is a dreamboat and anyone can see should be with Sam. When Justin gets kidnapped by a dragon, Sam and Ryan (and Gary the sassy unicorn) have to go save him.
The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller Gay
With all the Circe hype it’s almost easy to forget that Miller debuted in 2011 with this little heartbreaker. A retelling of Achilles and his ill-fated destiny with Troy that, unlike certain other Brad Pitt adaptations, doesn’t pretend that Achilles wasn’t GAY AS BALLS. The story is told from Patroclus’ pov, and if that doesn’t tell you to have tissues and chocolate handy while reading I don’t know what will.
Gossamer Axe by Gael Baudino Lesbian
“Chairiste Ní Cummen’s pride trapped her and her lover in the realm of the fairy folk, the Sidh. Chairiste alone managed to escape, and now, living in the modern world as Christa Cruitaire, a quiet harp teacher, she is all but resigned to her inability to win her beloved’s freedom . . . until she discovers that the volume and violence of the electric guitar and heavy metal might prove brutal enough to forcibly breach the barriers between the human and fairy worlds.” – goodreads.com
Ash by Malinda Lo Lesbian
What if Cinderella was a lesbian and also what if she promised herself to a fairy in exchange for a way out but also what if she then fell in love the King’s huntress and had to find a way out of that deal?
The Magpie Ballads Duet by Vale Aida Gay & Lesbian
When the governor dies his son Savonn, our brittle protagonist with a savagely sharp wit and deep reserves of loyalty, commandeers a chunk of the army and heads off to the mountains to avenge him. But the mountains are crawling with an enemy army, led by the man Savonn once loved. But who cares. Don't come to this book for the plot, come for Savonn. Come for his lover, who I don't want to talk about on account of spoilers, and the vicious, blood-soaked games they play with one another. Come for descriptions that will effortlessly paint cities in your mind, come for friendships that survive the most brutal of beatings, come for the perfect little moments that will make you fall in love with these characters.
The Black Magician trilogy by Trudi Canavan Gay
“This year, like every other, the magicians of Imardin gather to purge the city of undesirables. Cloaked in the protection of their sorcery, they move with no fear of the vagrants and miscreants who despise them and their work-—until one enraged girl, barely more than a child, hurls a stone at the hated invaders...and effortlessly penetrates their magical shield.” – goodreads.com
The Left Hand of Darnkess by Ursula K. Le Guin Non-binary
I don’t actually know if this book technically belongs on this list, all I know is that it definitely belongs on this list.
Passing Strange by Ellen Klages Lesbian
“San Francisco in 1940 is a haven for the unconventional. Tourists flock to the cities within the city: the Magic City of the World’s Fair on an island created of artifice and illusion; the forbidden city of Chinatown, a separate, alien world of exotic food and nightclubs that offer “authentic” experiences, straight from the pages of the pulps; and the twilight world of forbidden love, where outcasts from conventional society can meet.” – goodreads.com
Kirith Kirin by Jim Grimsley Gay
This book has wicked cool magic battles, but it also has pages and pages (and pages and pages and pages) of lore. So much lore. I powered through, which was worth it for the ending. Note that the romance in this book is problematic; While Jessex is not underage when his relationship with a much older man begins, he’s basically groomed for it. But true love though, so…. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
the Trials of Apollo series by Rick Riordan Bisexual
“After angering his father Zeus, the god Apollo is cast down from Olympus. Weak and disorientated, he lands in New York City as a regular teenage boy. Now, without his godly powers, the four-thousand-year-old deity must learn to survive in the modern world until he can somehow find a way to regain Zeus's favour.” – goodreads.com
the Iskryne trilogy by Sarah Monnette and Elizabeth Bear Gay
In this trilogy men form super intense bonds with wolves in order to hold back the troll hordes. In the hands of lesser authors this trilogy would have been a hot mess, but Monnette and Bear are no lesser authors, and they skilfully navigate the realities of what such bonds would entail. A lot of names to remember though. A LOT.
The Masked Empire (Dragon Age #4) by Patrick Weekes Lesbian
“I loved this book so much. I think a non-Dragon Age player would still find the book ok, though they would probably be confused at times because the book assumes the reader understands a lot of the lore and history of Thedas. Weekes does an amazing job in this book. All of the characters are different, with their own different voices, nuances, and ticks. The dialogue was amazing. The fight scenes were fun. The world came alive without chapters upon chapters of description.” - u/KristaDBall
the Inheritance trilogy by NK Jemisin Gay
I’m just now learning that the third book of this trilogy revolves around Sieh, who was my favourite thing about the first book. He’s a god made in the image of a child and has remained so for centuries, although it’s never made clear whether that’s by choice or design. There’s this fantastic tension in him, between childlike innocence and the wisdom (and despair) of the ages he’s lived through.
Shades of Magic trilogy by VE Schwab Gay
I haven’t read this trilogy yet, but when I asked u/misssim1 what they’re about she told me they featured “a bisexual prince, a gay pirate, and a crossdressing thief,” so really what else do I need to hear?
Los Nefilim by T. Frohock Gay
There’s a war between angels and demons being fought in 1930s Spain, but Diago Alvarez is staying out of it. He’s half-angel, half-demon, wholly not giving a fuck. But when Diago’s lover Miquel and his son are threatened Diago realises he does have some fucks to give after all. The atmosphere to be found in these novellas is just exquisite, and I hope Frohock returns to the world soon.
The Drowning Girl by Caitlín R. Kiernan Lesbian
India is schizophrenic and can no longer trust her own mind, because she is convinced that her memories have somehow betrayed her, forcing her to question her very identity. “The Drowning Girl was the most powerful reading experience of my life.” – u/ICreepAround
The Second Apocalypse series by R. Scott Bakker Bisexual
“Easily my favorite series. The writing style may seem difficult to some, but I was hooked from the start. I love the philosophical discourse embedded throughout, and I also like the drawn-out descriptions of combat, it paints a vivid picture for me.” – u/prawnexodus
The Rogues of the Republic trilogy by Patrick Weekes Gay
“Rogues of the Republic is a completed trilogy by Patrick Weekes, and has been compared many times to fantasy Ocean’s 11. That is totally accurate, in my opinion: it has a larger cast of characters, each with different skills that join together to pull off major heists. One nice thing here is the main cast includes men and women, many magical entities, trapped souls, and a straight up Death Priestess.” – u/unplugtheminus80
Song of the Shattered Sands trilogy by Bradley P. Beaulieu Bisexual
“Ceda's mother was killed by Kings when she was young, and she has lived on the streets of a giant desert city ever since, slowly gaining skills to try to gain revenge. Of course, she thinks that she needs to kill them somehow, and so became what amounts to a gladiator... but that’s only the start!...” – u/Dionysus_Eye
Wow. So many good books! Thank you everyone who voted. And thank you everyone who’s reviews I plundered for quotes. And thanks in advance to everyone who will let me know what books I labelled wrong, because some were tricky to pin down.
If you have any questions or comments about why this list was made, feel free to make a separate thread to voice them.
submitted by Megan_Dawn to Fantasy [link] [comments]


2018.03.20 06:14 aapeterson Cormac

I felt the heat most on the bridge of my nose and on the fat pockets under my eyes. Even through the windshield of the van, the sunlight made me squint and turned the top of my hair as molten as its color. Knowing I wouldn’t need the gas for later, I turned the air conditioner on full.
Then I waited.
No one tried to stop me. Cormac had been around so long he was forecasted like the weather, and he was due within an hour. To pass the time I listened to a CD of my old stand-up routine. The one I’d done right before everyone decided I wasn’t funny.
Halfway through a hackneyed routine about how office life sucked, I saw Cormac crest a hill. He was just big enough to see and my stomach twisted. If I stared hard, I could tell he was blue.
I gripped the steering wheel. The voice of a younger and oblivious me droned from the speakers. I could still turn around and call the whole thing off. No one knew I was out here… because no one cared. The thought of that got me out of the car more than anything else.
Do or die, schedule be damned. I walked toward Cormac.
Slow like honey poured out of the wide-lipped mouth of a mason jar, that was Cormac. Inevitable as the grind of tectonic plates, that was Cormac too. Cold and terrifying as the meaningless black between the stars, that was Cormac most of all.
As we were in the middle of the desert, there was nobody else around. I’d planned it that way so there wouldn’t be any distractions. Cormac still drew onlookers, but not here. There were no roads anywhere near and no one without a GPS would have been able to navigate. Cormac was on his way to Los Angeles, to tear it into little bits. Everyone knew that’s where he was going because Cormac only ever walked in a straight line. Until he was done with a place and started new.
Sooner than I would have liked, I was in front of him. The blue, almost granite-like, hue of his body made him seem part of a heat haze. Like a mirage, except he had destroyed the Three Gorges dam in the course of an afternoon, busted every Power Plant in the state of New York, and broken who knew how many monuments.
I held my finger an inch from Cormac’s face, and stared him in the eye. Or what I thought was his eye. Cormac was humanoid, but no one really had any fucking idea what he was made of or where he came from.
“I’m not touching you.” I said.
I held my finger there a while longer, and took a step back. Cormac’s expression, or what passed for his expression had not changed.
I swallowed hard and held my finger steady.
“I’m not touching you.” I repeated, careful that I shouldn’t slip and actually make contact.
My heart hammered so hard I could feel it there at the end of my fingertip. Pounding as if to burst the skin and smear Cormac with its hidden red essence.
Christ, I had stage fright.
“I’m not touching you!” I screamed so loud it echoed off the mesas.
The day after my dad died I got a gym membership. I told the instructor I wanted to be a runner. He didn’t say much about it, since I figured a lot of people must have been compelled to work under the same regimen with Cormac around. Not that it meant much, as you’d have to be a turtle for him to catch you. It was a psychological thing.
I’d spent a year training. I had been a string bean when I started, but now I was a string bean with muscles, sinews and fibers. I looked like a fast string bean. I wore shorts with a long sleeve running shirt. My hat shaded my red hair from the sun.
“Why’d the chicken cross the road, Cormac?” I taunted.
I was dancing around him, with my finger held a few inches away. I was careful not to touch him as that would mean death. Whatever Cormac was made from, it killed humans in milliseconds.
“It wanted to cluck your mother. Ha ha, get it Cormac? It wanted to cluck your mother?”
Someone smart had once tried to knock Cormac into orbit. They’d been the first person to realize that Cormac was indestructible. Working from that, they’d realized it didn’t matter how strong or indestructible he was, he still had finite mass. After they’d figured out how to strap a rocket to him faster than he could take it off, they’d launched him. The corks were barely out of the champagne before he reappeared, right in the exact spot he had been, and resumed walking.
They’d figured it had cost him about thirty seconds.
“Cormac! Did you fart? Whoo boy, I can smell it all the way over here.” I farted again for good measure. There were a lot of beans at my camp sites.
No one had ever figured out how he did the reappearance trick. That was still back when we thought there was a way of getting rid of Cormac. Back before the world had gone into damage control. They tried a couple of more times, then they figured he had to have some kind of massless drive. No one knew why he didn’t use it at ground level. Probably couldn’t.
“Cormac, would you rather be kicked once in the junk or punched twice in the face?” I ran in front of him and bent over, grabbing my ankles and let a big one rip.
“Fine! Before you have to ask they’ll all be at equal strength and the foot isn’t sharp. Just a regular sneaker.” I put my hands over my face so that it looked like I was wearing pair of glasses, and then stuck out my tongue.
They’d tried a neutron bomb first, once he was away from population centers. There was plenty of time to evacuate, and there wasn’t much confusion as to where he might be going. After that hadn’t worked they’d tried a hydrogen bomb, just to see if it would make any difference.
It hadn’t.
We’d exhausted gun fire, explosives, and all other conventional warheads long before that point. It didn’t even slow him down. One mile per hour. No faster no slower.
I saw the moon had risen and realized I’d stayed too long. I’d been too excited. I’d been too busy testing for a reaction. If I was going to keep it up I had to stick to the schedule. Keep to the plan.
I had to endure. I had to be as regular and inevitable as Cormac himself.
“I’ve got to go for the night, ol’ buddy. Your mother called and said she needs a good fucking. Guess your daddy turned gay or something. Oh, and by the way, I’m still not touching you.”
After I jogged to my first camp, I took a long drink. I also took out both of my alarm clocks. One was solar powered, the other on a battery that was guaranteed for three years. I suppose I could have gotten another alarm clock, with another battery, but that seemed too redundant.
I knew how this was going to end anyway, and as long as I got to the fifth camp I would live to see the endgame.
I took out my alarm clocks and set them to wake me up in eight hours, and slept.
Cormac would be one half-mile away when I woke up.
I intended that he watch me wake up every morning. Always out of reach.
I’d gotten the idea from stuff I’d read in history about some Arab guy that had led an army through the desert by following a trail of oases. The rest of it, the part of it that didn’t involve any fighting, well, that’d been all me as far as I could tell.
Taking advantage of Cormac’s clockwork regularity and a GPS tracker, I’d laid out ten fully stocked base camps through the desert wilderness. I had unloaded them one at a time from my van until I’d eventually reached Cormac. Once on the move, as long as I did a brisk hour and a half jog toward dusk, I could be at a camp every night and rise to meet Cormac every morning.
My actual mission was complicated. It had occurred to me, some time long before I had resolved to do it, that where weapons failed I might succeed. Perhaps because of my failures as a comedian, I had begun to wonder if the indestructible Cormac might be heckled to death.
I broke camp early in the morning. The sun hadn’t even risen, the alarm clocks hadn’t even gone off, but I was eager and jogged to Cormac. If I really looked at him, I could see a sort of pale blue glow coming out of the crystalline cracks of what I assumed was his skin.
“Sorry I’m late, buddy. Your mom wouldn’t let me pull out until a little bit ago. Then I had to wipe all the shit off my dick. Next time you talk to her, tell that bitch to stop eating corn. I got a kernel stuck in my foreskin.” I gave an exaggerated yawn.
Cormac kept walking.
“It ever bother you that no one comes out to see you anymore?” There had been some cults once that had worshiped Cormac. Most of them went away after the inevitable happened. Never-sleeping Cormac would get a hold of someone and murder them with slow, absent-minded efficiency.
Only one person had ever survived contact with Cormac. Dumb kid had fallen asleep in her car waiting for Cormac to show up, like he was fucking Santa Claus. She’d been wearing very thick clothes, which was what saved her from his initial touch. After realizing with horror that Cormac had gotten a grip on her wrist while she was asleep, she’d cut off her own hand.
“I know your mom’s better company than you, but still. I knew a guy with some retard pedophile for a brother. He still took a trip up to the loony bin every year at Christmas to see him. Oh but look at me talk, you’ll be wanting to kill yourself if I keep it up.”
Cormac’s head pointed dead ahead.
I walked over to the side of the highway and grabbed fistful of pebbles. I threw them one at a time, and bounced them off Cormac’s face. He didn’t so much as turn in my direction.
“Would you say you look more like a Vegas attraction reject, or more like a stain glass window made by someone with palsy? ‘Cause I just think you look like a dick.” I bounced a rock right off of Cormac’s eye.
“What’s the first thing you’re going to break when you get out to LA? Too many fake tits there, for my money. Not that I’m saying they’re all bad. I mean, your mom’s got some great hooters. I could suck on those puppies all night. But if you took out a few plastic surgery centers that would probably be a big help.” I grabbed a stick, walked round behind Cormac, and held it against what I figured was his butt-hole.
Except that Cormac didn’t shit. Or eat. Or sleep.
“I don’t know if you know this, seeing as how you can’t speak or whatever, but you’re the reason there’s no nuclear power anymore. You got too close that time in New York. Almost had a meltdown. How many guy’s was it that died carrying all the hot stuff out? Fifty?
“They have to figure out how to take dams apart when you’re around too. Millions of people displaced by that. Some of those green wackos think you’re the best thing for the environment we’ve ever had. Me? I just know you’re a guy who loves having a stick in his ass so much that he won’t say a word to have it taken out.”
I took the stick and walked to the front of Cormac and held it where his nose might have been.
“You should take a whiff of this Cormac. God awful stuff. It’s probably what your father’s shit smells like after a night of gang bangs. Tell me Cormac, how is it possible for one man to love taking cock that much?” I turned and threw the stick far ahead.
“Fetch!”
Cormac kept walking, unperturbed.
“Ah, fuck it. We’ll get there eventually.”
I didn’t give a shit if Cormac was impervious to attack. There was no such thing as perfect self-esteem.
“If I tell you a secret, promise you won’t tell anyone else?” I had taken to standing in front of Cormac long enough for him to reach toward me, before stepping back. Risky, and far ahead of what I had laid out for a schedule, but it was the only thing I could do to make him react.
“I used to masturbate to my second cousin. All the time. Every day I came home from school, I’d have to whip one out to her. I knew it was wrong, but she had the best tits I’d ever seen, next to your mother.”
Cormac reached for my throat, but I leaned back so that he missed by the smallest of margins. Still wasn’t much more passionate than swatting at a fly.
“Another thing I want to get off my chest. One time I was at a sleep-over. Must’ve only been eight or nine. Took a big ol’ shit. Huge. Like the one your father has all over the operating room table while they’re trying to shove his asshole back inside. Anyhow, the toilet wouldn’t flush. Wouldn’t you know it, not a plunger in sight. So I left it. Pretended I didn’t know who’d done it.
“There was a dirty kid there named Ryan Sivyer, so I let him take the blame. Would you believe that Ryan Sivyer didn’t invite me back to his birthday the next month? Never accused me directly. Passive aggressive asshole.”
Cormac thought he was going to get clever and get me with his other hand, the one I’d led him to believe I wasn’t watching, but I moved again so that his fingers came up short.
“Chick I used to date in high school, I did some bad shit with her too. She was one of those goth weirdos, had a tongue ring and could suck a dick like no one’s business. I was only going with her because I liked her sister. I stole a pair of her sister’s panties one night when I was over at her house. No one ever said nothing about it. I used them for a jizz rag for what had to be six months before I threw them away.”
It was getting late. I was off schedule again. I cussed at myself for it, but I wanted to… I hadn’t planned on it for two days. I pulled out my dick, so close to Cormac that he had to be infuriated even though he gave no sign. Even as slow as he was I felt vulnerable.
Staring Cormac in the face, I let loose a stream of urine that splattered all over his iridescent blue feet.
“As you may be able to tell, old buddy old pal. I have a habit for pissing people off.” I raised the stream and pissed all over Cormac’s abdomen. I got part of his hand for good measure.
“Ha ha! Do you get it, Cormac? Pissing people off?”
I let the stream go to a drizzle before I zipped my fly.
“Anyhow, I need to go for the night. Drink up. Your mother gets moody if I don’t piss on her at least a little.”
I sat by the campfire, drank some water and ate another plate of baked beans. It would be week and a half before Cormac got to a population center.
It would be the longest stand-up performance of my life, with the world’s worst audience.
No distractions. For the either of us.
I laid down, set the alarm clocks, and looked up at the stars. Which one had Cormac come from? Where were his people?
Where were the other Cormacs?
God help me, did Cormac even understand English?
Cormac was an Irish word for “Destroying Son.” It’d stuck, at least in the English speaking world, because the first place Cormac had ever appeared was Ireland, and some writer had written a poem. Cormac had walked up out of the ocean, and walked straight to Dublin. It was kept secret for a while. They’d pass off whatever he broke as an “unscheduled demolition.”
No one knew why he’d gone there first. It was probably random, since we’d later figured out he’d landed in the Atlantic Ocean like a meteor and spent two weeks walking the ocean floor. It was probably the closest dry land to his drop spot.
After a while it had gotten to be too big to cover up. Cormac had ripped up every power plant in the city. Tore them to bits. He did that with every major utility he found. In a matter of days 1.6 million people were without power, water, or any of the amenities that make city life possible.
He had made Dublin unlivable within three weeks.
“As you can see, I’m up bright and early this morning. I pulled a trick on your mom. I face fucked her so hard last night she passed out. Wasn’t able to wake up this morning to make me throw her another pity fuck. I know, I was afraid the slut might be dead too, but I checked for a pulse before I left.
“‘Fraid to say your dad took a turn for the worse though. The doctors had to… cut him a new asshole! Ha ha! Get it Cormac? Because his other one had been fucked to pulp?!?”
I grabbed another handful of rocks, and took my time so that each one hit Cormac between the legs. It may not have been his dick. His dick may have been in the chest for all I knew, but I figured it was the thought that counted.
“When I was in college, I went back to my home town one weekend. Almost no one in my home town goes to college, so I thought I was hot shit. I was failing everything, but I didn’t tell anyone that part. I’d started doing stand-up then, and everyone thought I was famous.
“Found that goth weirdo I used to date. She’d gotten fat. Not the cute kind of fat either. The kind where it’s all bunched up in different weird places. Her sister though, she got hotter. Her sister and I got lit up, and then fucked in some bushes. We got caught us right in the middle of it. The goth weirdo started punching me in the back, calling me a bastard. Calling her sister a whore.
“After I’d pulled out of her sister, she just sat down, put her head in her hands and asked me why I had to be such an asshole. All she wanted to know was why I had to be such an asshole.
“I looked right up into her fat wobbly jowls, right into that ugly lumpy face and I said… ha ha! I said ‘Because your sister’s hot!’
“So she says ‘You’re not funny, Sean’ so I says ‘Well, you’re not hot so let’s call it a wash!’ Ha ha ha!”
I brought my face as close to Cormac’s as I dared. So close I could feel the fey heat of his blue lights on my eyes. I stared down into the depths of his glass-like face and snarled.
“Her face, all fat and covered with tears, that was the most pitiful thing I’d ever seen in my life. Till now.” I spit in Cormac’s face. It glistened in the sunlight.
I spent the next long while following the blue demon, running around him in circles, declaring that I was not touching him. He kept walking onward. Indifferent.
I had stayed late again. It was only my third day, and I’d already made a habit of breaking the schedule I’d promised myself to follow to the letter. I turned to the dark path ahead, and looked over my shoulder.
“You know Cormac, my mom died when I was young.” I paused, wondering why I had said such a thing. The words had slipped out of my mouth without thought.
“She got cancer.” I felt sweat on the skin of my palms. I pretended it was from the nervousness of not knowing what to say next. I reached out, and grabbed something… a half-formed joke.
“You ever wish your mom had died, Cormac? So that she wouldn’t have to see what you are?”
For half a beat, so quick it might have been my imagination, I swore I saw the fucking thing stop in its tracks.
I dismissed it as wishful thinking and turned to go.
I about let loose the shit that saved my life, before I realized how well and truly fucked I was. I’d woken up to go to the bathroom. I had not expected to see Cormac’s hands pressing against the nylon wall of my tent.
Trapped in a tent like this, even Cormac might manage to get a hold of me before I could escape.
I heard the swish-swish of stretched nylon, as Cormac’s hands loomed ever closer. The tent was coffin-like in its proportions. If I sat up to unzip the door, it would take me right into Cormac’s eager hands.
In desperation, I threw all my weight against the side of the tent opposite Cormac. I hoped that if I could flip it over a few times it would give me the time I needed to get out.
I threw my weight, and rebounded so that I almost bounced back into Cormac.
“I just had to put stakes in the ground!” I shouted.
Cormac must have been on his knees, ready to smother me, because there was barely a foot to move. What I needed was a knife. I had one.
Outside.
My shorts, which I had put under my head as a sort of pillow, found their way to my hands. If… I found the zipper and pressed the sharp pull tab to the fabric.
Using my other hand to create tension, I ripped the fabric. Once the hole was big enough, I put my fingers through it and ripped it wider. It wasn’t easy. When I’d planned all this out, I’d bought the best. The fear of Cormac’s hands gave me strength. I pushed myself, scrambling, through the small hole, as I felt the rest of the tent collapse behind me.
I ran a few yards before I took the time to so much as pant. I was naked except for a pair of boxer shorts. And the desert morning was cold enough that if my balls hadn’t already been pulled tight against me in fear, the temperature would have sent them their in minutes.
I turned to see Cormac rising back to his feet. If he was upset at my near escape, he showed no sign. Perhaps, could show no sign.
“Ah Cormac, thanks for the wake up call, Buddy. Your mom fucked me to exhaustion last night. I can barely keep my eyes open!”
The alarm clock, still in the tent, went off. It was followed shortly by its companion.
I stopped and stood stock still.
My camp sites were set an eighth of a mile off of Cormac’s line of travel. They were also set with the idea that Cormac’s rate of speed was constant. In all the careful years of observation he was observed to travel no faster or slower in any condition.
I smiled.
I smiled wider.
I smiled like when I found that one joke that would lay an entire audience flat.
I whooped and hollered, turned around, and pulled my shorts down to give Cormac a good view of what he’d missed. What he had tried to kill.
“I didn’t know you cared!” I laughed so hard I cried. I scrambled around the camp, grabbing what I could find and hurling it at Cormac in orgiastic glee.
“Am I getting to you, you old blueballed fuckface! Am I fraying your last nerve, you cumguzzling dickwipe?”
Cormac, slowly, but perhaps, just perhaps a little faster than usual crushed one of the alarm clocks beneath his foot. A few minutes later, the other followed. The twin beeps died so that the only sounds left were the wind and my own breathing.
I remembered the pause from last night. The tick. I ran to Cormac as though eager to share glorious news.
“Hey Cormac! Your momma doesn’t love you! You hear me? Your Momma hates you!”
“When I was little, my mom could tell I liked fighting and stealing too much. I used to get caught with shit from the grocery store in my pockets all the time. Pack of gum, chocolate bar, maybe a comic book. I stole a candle on the day my mom died. I lit it in the church, and I could tell my mom was somewhere up in heaven crying that her son had to be such a little shit even in the face of something so serious.”
I was dressed again. Cormac had ripped apart a lot of my equipment, but I had extra at the next camp site. The only things that were unique were the alarm clocks I’d been carrying in my pockets.
“It was a very confusing time when she died. But I was glad too, because that’s the kind of asshole I am. My mother died, and suddenly I got all the oven-bake pizza and ice cream I could eat. Still, it kept me up at night. Thinking about her somewhere up there, watching me.”
Cormac was definitely walking faster, and I thought I could sense something like strain coming off the hulking blue beast. I walked close to him, stuck my face in his, and walked backwards, matching him step for step.
“I can’t even imagine what your mother thinks of you, Cormac. Maybe I drank when I should have studied. Maybe I fucked when I should have been loving, but I ain’t never done the fucked up shit you done. If I hurt someone it was always incidental. But you? You go out of your way to be a dick.”
I poked Cormac with a stick. In his eyes. In his crotch. In his chest. “How’s it feel to know you can’t catch me? Little Sean Doolittle, who couldn’t win a fist fight if he had a gun, and big strong Cormac is at his mercy. What would your mother say to that?”
I broke the stick on Cormac’s face, but I didn’t worry to much about it, as the way ahead offered many more.
“Way I figure, you’ve got all kinds of relatives. I ain’t no fucking scientist, but nothing like you happens by itself. You’ve got to have family. You’ve got to have people fucking over a long period of time, and with all your fancy powers, you got to have them fucking in a society!
“A sophisticated piece of cum like you doesn’t come to be without serious emotional fucking damage. And this whole slow walk bit? That’s pretty fucked up too. This isn’t how things are supposed to be, are they Cormac?”
I thought about a version of Cormac that was fast. I thought about a hundred million Cormac’s sprinting, and invulnerable to atomics. I had to suppress a shudder.
“I used to burn ants with a magnifying glass. It was another one of those shit things I did that pissed off my mother. So she told me about how in the olden times, when you did something bad, they’d stake you to the ground, and smear you with honey and let the ants eat you alive.
“I figure that’s what they did to you, and you’re here kicking ant hills.” I found another stick and rammed it into Cormac’s face, over and over.
“You’re a disgrace to your whole fucking family, Cormac! Your mother doesn’t even cry when she thinks of you. She thanks God that you’re out of sight and out of mind. She divorced your father so she could go fuck other men, have other children, and write you out of her life.
“The ants finally learned how to pinch, Cormac! So pinch! Ha ha! Your own mother hates you! Pinch pinch!”
The sun was going down, but I didn’t mind. I was onto something, and I’d never been good with schedules anyway.
My throat was hoarse from yelling all through the night, but I’d gotten some extra water once we’d walked close enough to my next camp. I’d forgotten sunblock, but that seemed a minor concern. We were only one day out from the end game, and that was beyond even my wildest expectations.
“Hey Cormac! You think your mom’s going to be disappointed I didn’t fuck her last night? You know, I lied yesterday, when I said she never talks about you. She does have one secret pleasure.
“When I’m nailing her, and I mean really nailing her. Humping her so hard that her ass and tits are shaking like jello, she likes to say some of the nastiest stuff about what a disappointment you are.
“It’s got this weird incest vibe. Always saying ‘oh Sean, fuck me so hard I forgot about that little shit that came out of my pussy’ or ‘oh Sean spank me like I never spanked that stupid fuck’ and, this one’s the tops ‘oh Sean cum in me like that loser son of mine dreams about every night when he touches himself!’”
I had to put my hand on my legs when I bent over, I was laughing so hard. My nostrils were shaking with the thrill of it. I laughed until it was a cough and I had to drink a long pull of tepid water. After a while, the laughter subsided.
“You ever think about fucking your momma, Cormac? I mean, I figure psychology’s got to be pretty universal and that’s Freud. Am I right? You ever listen at her door when she was balling the neighbors?”
I put my hand to my ear in an exaggerated signal that I was waiting for him to speak. Smile still wide, although my lips were beginning to chap, I prepared my next retort.
Cormac’s face opened. Somewhere near the middle of his head.
“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkk…” it had all the force of a whisper. All the calm of the eye of a storm. If I weren’t such a prick, I wouldn’t have been pulling my pants down even as he spoke. If I weren’t such an asshole, I might have stood there, moved by the first word ever spoken by a being not of this world, instead of taking a shit.
“Yoooooooooooouuuuuuuuu…” I picked up my own shit, quick as a could, and threw it in the open place in Cormac’s head. I picked up the bits of sand where some of it had escaped me, not caring for how filthy my hands were. Not caring that it was barbaric.
“Eat shit, Cormac!” I screamed, not even trying to be coolly disconnected. Not even trying to be funny. “Eat shit and die!”
It tore my voice box so bad I wasn’t able to speak for the rest of the day.
Neither did Cormac.
I had some cough syrup at my next camp site, and some sanitary wipes which I used on my hands. I even managed to eat a bit, but I hadn’t run so far ahead of Cormac that I had time for anything elaborate.
A weak part of me. The part of me that had taken Bryci’s sister into the back of the car and stuck my penis inside of her, thought about taking the tent and jogging ahead and catching a few hours of sleep. I swallowed hard, feeling the cough syrup lubricating my throat. I’d packed it in case it rained and I took a cold.
I ate some half-warm hot dogs, and another plate of beans. I hadn’t planned on all the beans, until I’d got to the store and they’d been on sale. It’s funny the way life works out.
I raised my right hand in a one finger salute to Cormac and kept eating. I made sure to hide the gun in the back of my shorts.
I’d been very careful that Cormac should not see me pick it up. That might have been a useless gesture, as Cormac seemed capable of knowing to the millimeter how to get to what he wanted to destroy, but on the off-chance that he couldn’t see, then I wanted it to be a surprise.
Back to Cormac, I looked down at the gun, and made sure all the chambers were loaded.
“My dad got Alzheimer’s. That’s a disease you get where you get to be rude as fuck and no one can get mad at you for it. So one day, I go into the home to visit him. Not that I did it all the time, I’m a dick, remember? But I got up there every year or so. So what do I see?
“Some fucking little redhead devil is there, lookin’ a bit like me. My dad has got him by the shirt, telling him to watch himself. Telling him that he’d wanted his mother to have the abortion, but she’d demanded they go through with it, and that they’ve both spent their whole life regretting the decision.”
I felt like I’d run out of things to say, and I couldn’t think up anything more creative than bouncing rocks off Cormac’s head. The most original thing I’d thought to think of that day was walking behind Cormac. Sometimes stopping.
That seemed to really burn his biscuit. He wanted me to kill me. Wanted to tear me apart worse than anything else on this ant-heap, and when I stopped behind him, when I made a move like I might get up and leave and never see him again, I could tell that pissed him off the most. I didn’t do it too much, because I didn’t want it to lose his effect, but I did it enough that he had to change speed.
Whatever it was they’d done to him. Whatever the terms of his punishment, changing his speed hurt Cormac. It hurt him like giving birth or being born, or who the fuck knew what.
“It was like going back in time and reading my dad’s mind when I was still a child. Can you even imagine? And there wasn’t even any cheesy Hallmark moment, where he made it clear he really loved me. Nothing but the shit.
“I figure that’s the way your parents feel about you. Except worse.”
“Ran into Bryci after all that happened. She was that goth weirdo from high school. She was a waitress. No wait, I’m sorry. A hostess. I got drunk, and we got to talking, but not about how I fucked her sister twenty years back. About her life. She got married, had a couple of kids. Still fat, but better looking. She wanted to know how life was in the big city, so I told her to come back to my room if she wanted to know.
“I’d washed out of comedy by then and I was doing insurance adjustments, but when she looked at me she saw a star. Anyhow, I fucked her. I fucked her good and hard and long, and I came right in her. Then I sent her on home to her husband and took a shower.”
I took a long swallow of water. My voice was scratchy, but I figured Cormac could suss it all out.
“Came back a couple of month’s later, on account of my dad had a stroke and was on life support. It said right in his will to pull the plug, so I did, but I also felt good about it, and I knew that wasn’t right. Fucking old man, talking about me that way.
“I went to the bar needing a fuck, found Bryci, and guess who was pregnant!?! I knew it was mine because of the way all the color ran out of her face. Wondering if I’d say something. Wondering if I’d tattle to her husband.
“So I ordered a drink. Then I took another, and next thing I know I’m shouting ‘Because your sister is fucking hotter than you!’ at the top of my lungs. Some guys took me outside and roughed me up. Small town. People have friends, and all that.
“Bryci comes out, looks at me and says ‘You’re not funny, Sean.’ Then she spits right in my face.
“So I’m laying there, blood all over my face, and I can’t quit laughing. I had a girlfriend back in the city. Well, a fuck buddy. And that’s when I realized, here I was, going to have a kid. Going to have a kid that I probably wasn’t ever going to be allowed to know, and the most significant emotional relation I’d ever had with anyone, was with a waitress whose sister I had fucked twenty years ago.
“Then I saw some piece about you on the news. Would you believe, except for things like building projects, no one ever thinks about you anymore? You’re just a consideration like earthquakes or volcanoes. No one actually cares about you. We’re not even terrified anymore. And that’s what I realized about myself. I was just someone people planned around. No one actually cared.
“So I figured I was going to have a kid, might one day find out who pops was, I might as well do something good. Went to the gym, learned to run. Made up a plan.”
I drank another deep pull.
“We’re a lot alike, Cormac. That’s why I fucking hate you so much.”
I took out all the bullets in the chambers but one, spun it faster than I could see, and with one flick of the wrist snapped the chamber back into place.
“In my plan, the big one I had for killing you, there were supposed to be news choppers here. There were supposed to be reporters, and big-titty college school girls getting wet between the legs. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to be a hero. I only wanted to get laid a couple of times before the ending.”
I was sitting on a rock, thirty or so yards ahead of Cormac, and he was aimed right at me. The hole in his head was open. Like the son of a bitch wanted to eat me.
“No one knows you’ve changed course, old buddy. No one knows your walking faster. No one even cares. Especially not your momma. I bet that time they knocked you into space, you didn’t even get something so personal as a swat to send you back. It was automated, I bet. No alarms or anything.”
I took aim at the hole in Cormac’s head and pulled the trigger. The gun fired and glanced off. Well, so much for last chances. I’d figured it wouldn’t work anyway.
“That wasn’t very dramatic.” I sighed, and loaded another bullet then repeated the process. This time I put the gun to my own temple and pulled the trigger. There was only a hollow click.
“My mother used to tell me I could frustrate someone to death.” I jumped down from the rock and shot at Cormac. There was another empty report. Three chambers left.
I stood directly in front of him and stopped. I put the gun to my temple and squeezed. Nothing.
“Do you want to kill me Cormac? Do you want to kill me so you don’t have to hear about your momma no more?”
I could feel the effort from him as he struggled to increase his speed by the smallest margins. “Yeeeeeesssssssssss….”
I walked toward Cormac and stayed a few tantalizing inches out of his reach.
“Do you want to kill me so bad you can’t think about anything else?” I asked.
I could see some sort of strange redness inside of Cormac’s mouth. I wondered if that meant he was damaging himself trying to get to me. “Diiiiiieeeeee….”
Cormac’s hand, slowly began to ascend. I leaned forward so my neck was the easiest thing to grab.
“The only relationship you have in the entire world, is with an ant.” I pulled the trigger at Cormac. Nothing. One left.
I could feel the warmth of Cormac’s blue light on my neck as his fingers prepared for a slow squeeze. I waited for the last possible moment.
“Nope, Cormac. Your mother told me last night you weren’t even good enough for this. Do the world a favor and kill yourself.”
I put the gun to my temple.
Two circles of white appeared on Cormac’s head. I supposed they were his eyes. They seemed full of horror. Of agony without end. Of denial and loss.
I smiled. Then I squeezed the trigger.
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